Make Yourself From Introvert To Extrovert

Different Folks have got different strokes. In the quest to understand more about people, one would realize there are many similar traits. Usually we have a tendency to put people in to boxes for a much easier reference. Below is a list of ten points highlighting some variance of the introverts and the extroverts? Extroversion 1. They are observers, verbalize what they judge 2. Energize by people and action 3. Get tired spending too much time alon 4. Rather Talk than listen 5. Sometimes they speak before they think 6. Preference to work in groups 7. Test ideas on others 8. Like affirmation from others 9. Talk until answers and solutions come to them 10. Some of the key words associated with extroverts are: Sociability, Interaction, External, Gregarious, External events, Extensive, Breadth, Multiple relationships and they speak then think. Introversion 1. They keep their observations and judgements to themselves 2. Energized by thoughts and ideas 3. They are drained by prolong and intense interactions with several people 4. Preference is to listen over talking 5. Often regret not having spoken up 6. Think before they talk 7. Often deferring a response 8. They get rejuvenated by spending time alone with their own thoughts. Sometimes even extensive time for they feel a need to be alone 9. Perceived to be good listeners, shy and very reserved people. 10. Some of the key words associated with introverts are: Territoriality, Internal, Concentration, Intensive, Reflective, Depth, Limited relationship, internal reactions and they think then speak. Just like the words from a wiseman, confucius, as he says that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. It is always useful in our first step to have some simple understanding of the type of people we interact with As an Introvert I've had my fair share of criticism and judgment from others - especially extroverts. It's just as hard sometimes for me to understand what feeds their soul as it is for them to understand what feeds my soul. The advantage they have is that our nation is decidedly extrovert in nature, thus those traits are revered. We introverts know better, for without us and our unique qualities where would the world be? Wouldn't it be great for every extrovert to understand and accept us for who we are and how we function best? Barring that, here are 10 things that I think every extrovert should know. As an introvert: I prefer to think before speaking...yes, sometimes longer than a pause. Don't rush on thinking I haven't heard you or that I'm not interested in the conversation. I'm processing - give me time. I do not like to talk while listening to music or watching T.V. - I can do all quite well, just not at the same time. I prefer the sweet sound of silence... A lot. I'm not depressed when I'm alone, but I will get depressed if I don't get enough alone time. I am not shy; I'm introspective and often very private. I'll enjoy you more if you quit telling me to loosen up and have fun. I'm not mad, there's nothing wrong, and I'm quite happy. You'll have to trust me on that one - now go away. My comfort zone is probably smaller than yours, but no less important. I'm not anti-social. I like people in small doses. I am not broken; I do not need to be fixed; there is nothing wrong with me. 10 Tips to Boost Your Positive Energy by Dr. Larina Kase in Self Help (submitted 2007-07-31) Wouldn't it be great to pop out of bed in the morning, have flowing energy throughout your day without any caffeine or candy bars, accomplish everything you want, and feel great? For most people this would be a dream--we could all use more energy! I'll share with you 10 simple tips to boost your energy each day. The key is consistency. You need to do these things regularly to feel the cumulative effects. 1. Plan important activities when you have the most energy. This is one of my favorite tips. Plan your schedule around your energy level. Choose activities and projects that are naturally energy producing at your low points in the day. If you drag in the morning, plan one of your more enjoyable activities first thing. It may take some time to transition your schedule but it will be worth it! 2. Do the work you love. Nothing is as energy increasing as passion and enthusiasm. If you have no interest in your work, it's unlikely that you'll ever have optimal energy. This doesn't mean that you must love everything you do but at least some of it must utilize your natural talents and interests. 3. Boost your energy by getting regular exercise. This certainly does not come as a surprise to you. You know that you exercise makes you feel good and boosts your energy. You just need to do it--regularly. 4. Know your personality style. Your personality determines what is energy draining or producing for you. If you're naturally an introvert you typically recharge by quiet time on your own. If you're naturally an extrovert, you typically gain energy by social time with others. 5. Eat right and watch your energy soar. This is another one of those tips that you already know but, if you're like most people, probably aren't doing. A diet rich in complex carbohydrates, protein, and fiber will help you sustain energy and avoid the sugar roller coaster that you get when you eat sugary snacks. 6. Keep the big picture in mind. It's easy to get caught up in the moment of stressful situations and feel exhausted. If, however, you remember the big picture including why you're motivated to achieve your goal or why the small stuff isn't that important, you'll feel energized. 7. Drink water. One of the most common causes of fatigue is dehydration. We often mistakenly assume that we're hungry but the fatigue culprit is often thirst. 8. Celebrate and reward achievements. The more you focus on your achievements, both large and small, the more success focused you will become. This will help you achieve more and all this achievement is sure to boost energy. 9. Avoid energy-vampires. You know these types of people. Just being in their presence seems to drain your energy in the blink of an eye. Use assertiveness skills and limit your time with them. 10. Take physical and mental breaks. Monotony is exhausting. Periodically give yourself a break by a few moments of mindless activity and quick stretching exercises or walking. If some of these tips stand out to you as more energizing or practical, select those and focus on implementing them consistently. You'll get and keep your energy flowing. Are you tired of being an introvert and would like to be more outgoing? Are you watching the parade go by because you feel trapped by your own personality? Yes, you can not only "be"; you can also "become". You are certainly a valuable human being. Follow these 5 simple steps and you can be a "human becoming", making many friends. Seeing/Noticing. "The eyes are the windows to the soul." Establish eye contact. It is much easier to establish rapport when your eyes connect with someone else's rather than a mere glance and turn away. This initial part of the process is the foundation of what is to follow if there is to be success. Communication from the eyes is not to be taken lightly. An entirely new world could be made from what messages the eyes convey. The contact should be comparable to the turning on of a high wattage light bulb. It should say, "I'm on" and should have the effect on your potential friend as a moth would be drawn to a flame. Verbalizing. Don't forget about the power of the tongue. Speak and with clarity. Abandon constraints such as "never speak unless first spoken to". Directly confront the fear of rejection that your goodwill might be trampled upon if first offered. Speak as though you have known this person all your life. Be creative. "Hi", "How are you," and "Hello" are still effective openers, but they don't always require much creativity. Challenge yourself to open communication by somehow connecting you and the person with the occasion, environment, or circumstances. Be sure to give a reasonable guess on what it is about the circumstances that unites your interests. For example, if you are in the express lane at Safeway and the line is slower than usual, you might say, "Are we really in the express lane?" 5 Steps to Facilitate Communication with the Dearly Departed by Christy DeArment Martin in Spirituality / Paranormal (submitted 2011-01-14) Are You interested in opening up yourself to talking to spirits. Are You willing to receive messages for yourself and others? Have You lost someone and wish to make contact? When I do a psychic reading for someone, I know I???ve reached the connection with them when I sense their guides in the room. Sometimes departed loved ones show up. Usually they are just there supporting their embodied loved one. Sometimes they give brief messages like ???I love You??? or ???everything will be alright???. Here are 5 steps to facilitate communication with departed loved ones. 1. To start talking to the disembodied you first need to release fear about speaking to spirits. It may be fear of others thinking you???re crazy talking to ghosts, fear that you???re making it up, or fear that you???ll start talking to evil entities. Archangel Michael can help You release your fears. All You need to do is just ask him, and he???ll assist You. Another way to release fear is by understanding You are just communicating or sharing information with someone who is in spirit. We are all Spirit living in physical bodies. You may also have to release fear of the word ???ghost???, which often conjures up scary images from childhood. Or just start using the word ???spirit??? instead. 2. Set your boundaries around talking to departed spirits where you???re comfortable. Just as in life you wouldn???t allow someone in your space who doesn???t respect You, so don???t allow ethereal beings to disrespect you either. For me I???m comfortable talking to spirits that I, a friend or a client had a person relationship with when they were living. If I don???t know them or You don???t know them, then I just don???t want to interact with them. I guess that reflects on my introvert personality. If You???re more on the extroverted side, You may enjoy talking to every ghost that passes you by. If a departed spirit crosses your boundary and you???re feeling uncomfortable You can call on Archangel Michael at any time to take the spirit to the Light. Or just tell them to go. I personally have only talked with loving and respectful spirits. At the first hint of a lost soul trying to make contact with me I send them to the Light. Of course, if You???re willing and the spirit is being respectful You can always ask what they want. Like I said, I???m more of an introvert and I just send them Reiki and tell them to go to the Light. 3. Sadness and grief about losing someone You love needs to be released in order to have clear communication. I???ll give you a personal example for this. I lost my Mom when I was 13. I wasn???t able to have a clear spirit conversation with her until I was 29. In that first easy communication with my Mom she told me that I had to let go my sadness around her being gone before I could hear her. My grief acted like a communication barrier. She said that my clear heart chakra, an effect of learning Reiki, was how we were able to connect so well at that point. So if You???ve lost a loved one, take heart in knowing the more You???re able to let go and release them, the easier it will be to have a spirit relationship with them. There???s no set time around this. Just allow yourself to process your grief in a way that suits You. 4. The departed spirit needs to be forgiven to be able to express information easily. A lack of forgiveness creates a communication barrier just as sadness does. Here???s another personal example. My Dad died when I was 15. He would come to me in dreams sometimes. I could also feel his energy guiding me in a very nonspecific way when I called on him for help. I have forgiven him on deeper and deeper levels over the past couple of years. He told me that the only thing that kept him from talking with me was my lack of forgiveness. Let me tell You , now he???s one of the most clear and direct spirits I talk with. Talk about specific guidance! It???s amazing. 5. Affirm that You are willing to talk with the departed. I know I used to see spirits all the time as a child. I shut the ability off because it scared me. I had to reaffirm that I am willing to talk with spirits who???ve crossed over. So have fun talking with spirits. Enjoy the broader perspective they have to offer. Take comfort in the love that???s still there. 6 Ways to Improve Your Recruiting Skills by Julie Anne Jones in Business / MLM (submitted 2010-11-10) You've started your own Direct Sales business and by all accounts your business should be busting at the seams, but for some strange reason, it's not. Like many new business owners, you may be thinking: "Recruiting? No, not that... Anything but that!" Fortunately recruiting for a direct sales business does not have to be the big, scary, hairy green monster it may appear to be. The following direct sales training tips will help you take the fear out of promoting your business. 1. Know & appreciate yourself and your company If you realize that you are one of the greatest things to come along since the invention of M&Ms or chocolate covered raisins, and you have an amazing business opportunity to offer someone, your perception changes. Get grounded in what makes you and your direct sales company special, unique, and great. 2. Learn about recruiting from a recruiting expert The easiest way to get over your fear of recruiting is to remove the confusion and common misperceptions surrounding it. As a direct sales trainer I recommend that you talk to your leader or a coach about what you are doing. I've compiled the "best of" direct sales training tips from all three of my audio cds into one downloadable program which you can find on my website. 3.Have fun Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, recruiting can actually be fun. You get to meet a lot of neat people, continually have new experiences, and learn more from every interaction. Enjoy this process, consider it part of your training and fear will be the last thing on your mind. 4. Let your creative juices flow The more creative you are in your recruiting efforts, the more fruit your efforts will reap. Put your own unique, creative twist on it. For instance, be sure you have a compelling, visual recruiting "commercial" to share at every show you do (like a "why" bag with props that share what you love about your business and what it's provided for you). 5. Be persistent and continue to follow up Through your training you have implemented some recruiting strategies and have yet to see the rewards to your efforts? That doesn't mean they don't work! A few people haven't returned your calls or acted to join your business? That doesn't mean they're not interested! It just might not be the best time for them. Be persistent and keep putting effort into your recruiting strategies and, most importantly, continue to follow up with potential leads. With continuing persistence, the results will happen. 6. Design a wonderful daily, weekly, and monthly marketing plan Great results do not happen by accident. Instead, they are the byproduct of a well thought-out, documented, logical plan. Work with a coach or your leader to design and follow such a plan. I'd love to know what your recruiting strategies are. 7 Fun Small Talk Topics to Talk About for Any Situation by Joshua Uebergang in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2010-08-25) Small talk can sometimes seem like an arduous process of merely filling the dead air with something, anything you can think of to keep the night moving forward, or to ward of the awkward, unyielding silence that seems to hover just above any human interaction. And yet, small talk is a necessary component of interpersonal communication in business and personal lives, used to "grease the wheels" of social interaction, to smooth out the inevitably rough edges of meeting people for the first time. It can be, with the right frame of mind, an enjoyable pastime all by itself. In that spirit, here are seven fun small talk topics to talk about in every situation. SPORTS Though it may not seem like it at first blush, sports are actually a great topic to discuss in small talk situations because just about everyone has an opinion about it, good or bad. Something as simple as bringing up the local team and how they're doing is usually enough to kick off a conversation even with those least interested in sports of any kind. And if you hate sports, well, feel free to talk about that to. NEWS News is a funny thing. It's always fresh, each and every single day, with plenty of ripe, juicy events and headlines leaping off the pages and into conversations all over the world. If you're looking for something to talk about, keep a keen eye out for the news of the day to help get you started. TRAVEL Travel is a great topic to talk about in business. Everybody who travels loves to talk about it, and everyone who doesn't travel also loves to talk about, because they hope to very soon be traveling. This is not only a great way to kick off a small talk conversation, but it is a great way to share tips, anecdotes and horror stories for future reference. ENTERTAINMENT This is a broad enough topic that just about everyone will be happy to discuss it and make good conversation. Bring up the jazz club that just opened or a great restaurant or the movie theater across town. Chances are most everyone would love to discuss it with you. FAMILY This is a great topic to talk about because people have fairly clear feelings about their family, for good or bad. Sharing the good stories or commiserating with the bad is a great way to fill a few minutes of small talk conversation. Introverts and extroverts are more than able to talk about their family making it a (hopefully) fun topic. WORK Talking about work can be a great way to network with colleagues or share the pain in a slumping economy. Even if the person is a workaholic, they'll love to share their struggles with someone. TELEVISION TV makes a great topic because everyone has one, and the few outliers (I've found to exist especially in business) that don't are more than happy to talk about how much they hate TV. 9 Ways to Boost Your Networking at The BST Conference by Sheila Jensen in Business / Strategic Planning (submitted 2010-12-29) The BST Conference is an ideal opportunity for networking with other safety leaders (no matter what your level) ??? but it???s easy to not take advantage of it. We asked some expert networkers from the BST Conference to share their best tips for making sure you leave with more than good memories: 1. Plan. A good networking plan is basic; it should serve as a guide for how you spend your limited time without infringing on the spontaneity of this naturally social event. Consider what you will focus on at the BST Conference, the type of solutions and groups you???re looking for, and the new ideas you???d like to walk away with. 2. Adapt. Networking comes more easily to some of us than others. Extroverts typically welcome the opportunity to meet new people while introverts often dread it ??? and end up missing out. If you???re overwhelmed by the thought of networking at the BST Conference, adapt some techniques to put networking more in your comfort zone, for example bring a list of questions you want answered to help focus your discussions (and keep it from feeling uncontained) or bring along some small token giveaways from your process, like stickers or postcards with your logo, to get things started. 3. Share. Come prepared with successes (even little ones) that others might benefit from knowing about. Don???t be afraid to share some of the challenges you???ve faced either ??? especially if you???ve discovered a solution that others would benefit from. 4. Exchange. Networking shouldn???t end when the BST Conference does. Treat each person you meet as a potential long-term networking partner. Carry and collect business cards in networking situations and encourage others to follow up with you. 5. Listen. Even if you can???t use everything you hear, you???ll nearly always find something helpful that you can adapt to your process. 6. Focus. Keep your conversation positive and focused on solutions, rather than gripes about management situations or personality problems. 7. Make good. Show your professionalism by keeping any promises you made to people you met at the BST Conference. Following through on even small things (sending that presentation or the article you mentioned) shows that you???re serious about your process. 8. Stay in Touch. Some networkers make a point of sending a note to a fellow networker after they???ve tried a new idea they got from them, usually giving feedback about the idea as well as information about anything they may have modified. 9. Lead. Don???t just rely on the annual BST Conference to sustain your networking. Establish local networking groups and meet regularly. It???s a cost-effective way to keep your process fine-tuned. Ask your consultant for contacts near your site. A Dozen Ways to Support Learning Styles by Susan Fitzell in Education (submitted 2010-07-03) Copyright (c) 2010 AIMHI Educational Programs Different learning styles require different methods of teaching. 1. For students who take in information with their senses, when presenting lessons: a. Include specifics, facts, and details, and show why it is realistic and makes sense. b. Include real life applications and examples of where this has worked before. 2. Some students must have the big picture, or an integrating framework, to understand a subject. The best way to support this type of student would be to provide an overview of the day's lesson(s) at the beginning, and put information in context. 3. Some students are decisive, planning-oriented and self regimented. They focus on completing the task, only want to know the essentials, and then take action quickly (perhaps too quickly). These students will benefit from the following: a. Split Page Color Coded Notes (They love organizational systems) b. Remind Judging types to check their answers and take a second look when solving problems. 4. Other learning styles often postpone doing an assignment until the very last minute. They seek information to the very last minute (and sometimes beyond). For these students, break down assignments and teach them to use graphic organizers. 5. Logical, justice-oriented students like a clear course and topic objectives. a. Structure the class material logically. b. Be succinct. Teachers who ramble lose thinking students. 6. Interpersonal, values-based students like working in groups, especially harmonious groups. a. To promote harmonious groups, provide students with guidelines on how to work best in a group. b. Show the interpersonal impact of what's being taught, especially its importance to the individuals involved. 7. Extroverted students learn by explaining to others. They do not know if they understand the subject until they try to explain it to themselves or others. Allow time for participation and discussion. Use Think, Pair, Share and Peer Assisted Learning. 8. Introverted students want to develop frameworks that integrate or connect the subject matter. To engage introverts: a. Provide written materials ahead, especially if you want discussion or decisions immediately. b. Pause when asking for response. Twenty seconds is effective (but hard for extroverts). 9. For Visual Spatial Learners - Make visual organizers or memory models of the material being learned. (Give copies to other students in the class). 10. For Musical Rhythmic Learners - Create "raps" (key dates, math, and poems). 11. For Naturalist Learners - Sort and classify content in relation to the natural world. 12. For Body Kinesthetic Learners - Create hands on projects and conduct hands on experiments. Step 1 Confidence. It is important to be confident when approaching people you don't know yet. The way you get confident is being true to yourself and comfortable in your own skin. Are you an introvert or extrovert? Either way there are ways to get comfortable and confident in your own skin. As you become more comfortable and confident you will be more natural when meeting a new person. Step 2 Humor. Humor is such a great way to open up conversation. By humor I don't mean being really silly. (although this works for some people) But just make a joke out of the current situation. Look for ways to find the lighter side of things when meeting someone new. Chances are the other person is probably nervous like you, and the laughter will make things feel easier and less awkward. Step 3 Be in the moment. When you are focused in the moment there is more ease because you aren't worried about about everything else that is going on in your life. When you are aware in the moment when meeting someone knew, you allow the other person to be more comfortable because you are focusing your attention on the persona and just being in the moment. ADD - How Much Happier Do You Want Your Child To Be? by Garry Macdonald in Health (submitted 2008-05-29) A major part of the solution to many medical conditions is identification and acknowledgement that the condition exists. Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) is no different. In order to treat the condition, it's critical that we identify the symptoms. This article describes the various symptoms manifested in children and highlights the differences between boys and girls. ADD can take several forms in children. It is not difficult to identify a child with ADD - their personality often reflects total chaos. In general, boys fit this category. However there are some types of ADD which go undiagnosed because their effects are far less evident. This occurs primarily in the case of girls. There are many girls who are categorized as "tomboys". They frequently exhibit some of the features of ADD, like being more involved in physical activities, but generally they are not as reckless as boys. As a result teachers and parents tend to jump to the conclusion that the child has no interest in academic pursuits and is basically disorganized, however the possibility of ADD is seldom considered. Besides the "tomboy" types, "chatty" girls could also be suffering from ADD, however they often remain undiagnosed. This is a fusion of over-activity and inattentiveness, and is usually touted as socially extrovert. These girls are extremely talkative rather than being physically active. They also have difficulty telling detailed stories and will often be distracted. Those we label "daydreamers" could also be suffering from ADD. They do not draw attention to themselves and tend to be very quite. However, being introvert and not paying attention in class can be another form of ADD. Symptoms might include anxiety and depression - particularly when given school projects plus the inability to complete school projects. This generally goes undiagnosed because the child is thought to be lazy. What is fascinating is that many girls with ADD have quite a high IQ and could be considered as "gifted". Keep in mind that ADD is not a learning disorder, and patients are not always poor performers at school. Until high school they can perform quite well but with mounting pressure and assignments, symptoms might become more and more evident. When undiagnosed, ADD might cause significant harm. Children will often be labeled as disorganized, lacking intelligence and lazy, when in fact, they might be silent sufferers of ADD. They will often have very low self-esteem and be convinced they are quitters or stupid. It is crucial that the problem is identified and treated before it becomes too pronounced and any long-term damage is done. Advice to Help You Understand Your Spouse by Emmanuel Roman in (submitted 2011-01-23) One of the greatest pieces of advice that me and my wife have ever received is to learn and to understand the four temperaments. By doing this, we have learned to understand each other better and to grow closer as a married couple. Now I understand why my wife really enjoys being the center of attention, why she is so friendly with everyone and she understands why I prefer to hide out in the corner and hope nobody notices me. At the beginning of our relationship, we had this problem where she would constantly try to include me in all her affairs and if I didn't want to, she would just think that I didn't like her or her friends, when that really wasn't the case. I would just prefer to be alone or not around a lot of people. Situations like this made us wonder if we were really compatible with each other, even though we really loved each other. Learn the four temperaments, it can be a great piece of knowledge that will strengthen your marriage and can also help you to understand and better your relationship with other people, like your parents or your children. What are the four temperaments? The four temperaments basically are the four different types of people in the world. They are the Melancholic, the Phlegmatic, the Sanguine and the Choleric. They all have different characteristic traits and explain why we are so different from each other. To explain them in simple terms would be: The Melancholic is an introvert. He usually likes to be alone or not around a lot of people and this is generally because it makes him feel uncomfortable and because he doesn't like people. He is also a pessimist and usually sees the bad in everyone. He's usually perceived as shy, quiet, mean and serious. The Phlegmatic is also an introvert and likes to be alone most of the time or around one or two people. Groups also make him uncomfortable. The difference is that he is an optimist and likes people. He is usually perceived as shy, quiet, nice and kind. The Sanguine is an extrovert. The are the life of the party. The one mostly everyone likes. The ones with a lot of friends and likes to be in groups or with somebody. They don't like to be alone. They are also great leaders, since they take charge but are also nice to people. They are perceived as outgoing, friendly and funny. The Choleric is also an extrovert but they're the ones that love to be in control of everything. Like to boss people around but without regards for how they feel. They are also leaders but are usually task oriented instead of people oriented. To them getting the job done is most important, they don't care who they have to run over. They are perceived as outgoing, bossy and even funny. An example of how they would react in a situation is, pretend that there are five people eating in the same table. Suddenly one of them gets a piece of food stuck on their teeth, which is clearly visible when they talk or smile. The Melancholic would think, "Yuk, how disgusting, doesn't he know how to eat". I hope he cleans his teeth soon. But he doesn't tell him but rather chooses not to look at him. The Phlegmatic would think, "Oh, poor guy, he has food stuck on his teeth, I hope he notices soon and cleans his teeth before he makes a fool of himself. But also doesn't tell him, since he's afraid he might embarrass him or something. The Sanguine would smile and in a friendly way say, "Hey you have something on your teeth." While the Choleric would just stand up and wipe the person's teeth himself. Telling him afterwards, " You had something on your teeth". This is just a simple example, how would you react in a situation like that? It is also necessary to know that most people have two temperaments in them, and you might say, I consider myself a Phlegmatic but I like to hang around groups from time to time. Or you might say, I am pretty bossy and consider myself outgoing but I also like to be alone. This is natural since like I said, most people have a major and a minor temperament in them. How about your spouse, how do you consider them? This is a question you can ask each other. This way you might learn to understand each other better. So if your spouse likes to be alone most of the time, maybe it's not because they don't love you or like to spend time with you but maybe because they're some type of introvert. An introvert needs this time, just as much as an extrovert needs to be around people. Learn to understand each others temperaments, learn to respect each other the way you are, but also learn to get out of your comfort zone from time to time. For example, I'm a Melancholic but through the relationship with my wife, who's a Sanguine, I have learned to loosen up a bit, to be friendlier and kinder to people, to not be so pessimistic. And she has learned to control herself a bit and to respect that I need to be alone sometimes without it meaning that I love her less. They are many books on the subject, and I can go on and on talking about the good points and the bad points that every temperament has, but my point is for you to search out on your own about this in order to be able to understand your spouse better and to strengthen your marriage. Wishing Your Marriage the Best. Assesment Tests to Expect When Applying for Banks and Big Corporations by Jingjing Fan in Careers / Recruitment (submitted 2011-02-23) Assessment tests form part of a large part of the job interview processes, especially in larger companies. Such assessments are currently used by over 80% of the Fortune 500 companies in the United States and by 75% of the top companies in the England. There are 4 major categories of assessment tests that candidates could be subject to when applying for a job. 1. Assessing skills ??? aiming to identify whether or not the candidates have the skills needed to do the job. They would use multiple choice questions or a situation simulation to evaluate the technical or professional expertise and knowledge of the candidates possess. For example, technical skills or knowledge of a foreign language. 2. Assessing personality ??? some of the most common personality assessment tests are the Myers-Briggs (determine to what degree a person is extrovert/introvert, sensitive/intuitive, rationalizing through thinking/feeling, dependent on judgment/perception) and the DISC (identify candidates as Dominant, Influencing, Steady or Compliant). Inconsistencies would rise a red flag in the recruiter???s mind and they will investigate further to determine why such differences have occurred. Although this might give an insight on the person???s work style preference it would not identify or confirm job competencies 3. Assessing cognitive abilities - testing the verbal, numeric or logical reasoning. In essence, these tests measure IQ. This would help the recruiter assess the candidates??? ability to learn. Some tests that you can check out are the Wonderlic Personnel test and Profiles XT. Recruiters would use the results of these tests to assess the candidates??? subsequent performance as well as to compare and measure between different candidates. These, together with the structured interview and some type of work sampling would give a pretty accurate idea of the potential of candidates. 4. Assessing competencies ??? this test would be trying to determine behavioral patterns with respect to qualities such as motivation, honesty, leadership, trustworthiness, reliability, and pro-social behavior, etc. The candidates would be asked direct questions requesting to quote past experiences which relate to how they approached sensitive issues, or they will be asked to talk about preferences and interests which would then be used to determine future behaviors in the areas of interest. These tests are often used to identify candidates who are likely to engage in inappropriate, dishonest, and antisocial behavior at work. Companies would usually invite the candidates to fill out a test during the second or third round of interviews. As far as banks are concerned, almost all use some sort of assessment to evaluate skills and compatibility. We strongly advise you to ask for more information about the sort of test you will need to pass before going for the assessment; this would give you time to do your research and prepare well for them. The Growinfinance.com Team Baby Name. Who Else Wants To Name Their Baby Apple? by Joanna Payge in Family (submitted 2007-02-13) Hopefully nobody, as this name unfortunately totals a number that indicates relationship problems, misfortune and bad luck. And that's not according to some new 'name meanings' list, but an Ancient Scientific Name Analysis System that has been used since ancient Egyptian times when it was used solely for the naming of the Royal Children, to ensure they had the best possible traits for their life. These days, very few people are choosing their baby names with a scientific strategy! Many will choose a name based on a name they like the sound of (which may turn out to be a good thing if you have good intuition), or after a favourite relative, or after a relative who would be upset if their name wasn't used! Or perhaps the baby name will be influenced by the latest 'popular' baby names, or you will name your baby after a singer, actor or other celebrity that you like. So, all-in-all it's a bit of a lottery as to what name your baby ends up with. Maybe you have heard that a particular name apparently means 'child of joy' or some other such phrase. That is all well and good, but it doesn't tell you anything about the personality traits of that name, or the health issues connected with the name, or whether the letters in the name are positive for your child or negative. (Every letter of a name also has a meaning). It also doesn't tell you whether the name is a good match with the surname you have, and this is vital. Here is an example of what I mean. If the first name you choose for your baby indicates a very outgoing, fun-loving personality, but your surname indicates very introvert qualities, then sooner or later your child may experience behavioural and personality problems as these two extremes create conflict and discord. You may know someone yourself who can be extrovert one minute and moody and withdrawn the next. This can obviously create relationship problems. Will their future partner fall in love with the extrovert side or the introvert side? And what happens when the other side comes out? Let's look at the letters in a name briefly. Some letters like C and G for instance are positive, while the letter H brings 8 years of stress and strain at various times throughout the life, and this can be pinpointed via the date of birth. U brings losses. F brings a tendency for concealment. What you ideally need is a name for your baby that complements the surname, totals a number that brings good personality traits and has predominantly positive letters. (I can advise on all these). To give you some food for thought about how a name can affect someone's life, here are the names of some famous, successful people who have a different name today to the one they were born with. Cilla Black, John Wayne, Bono, Elton John, Englebert Humperdink. The latter is a particularly interesting one. Englebert's former name was Jerry Dorsey, yet he had no success as a singer with that name in spite of the fact that he toured all the pubs and clubs for 16 years. It was only after he changed his name that he went on to have number one hit records, international success and wealth, and he is still releasing records today all these decades later (so his unusual new name didn't simply create a one-hit wonder). The key to his new name is the fact that, according to the system I use, it totals a number that brings success in Entertainment! (I think that was just down to luck or good intuition in this case, I'm not aware of him having had Name Analysis!) Would the other celebrities have had the same success with their former names? We will never know, but I can't imagine Elton being an International Star as a Reg Dwight! For more information about Name Analysis, it's history, what it can do for you and importantly how I can help you give your baby the best name to help them have a happy, well-balanced life, please visit my website. http://www.babynamemeaning.co.uk c:\data\pdfconvert\Ball Gown Wedding Dresses e more than pleased with the exceptional amount of options available to y by hello manty.txt ************************************************************************ [Error] - File could not be written... Bring up the introvert child by Paul Banas in Family (submitted 2007-04-24) Introversion is a common behavioral trait characterized on the far end of the spectrum by: * Constant preoccupation with one's own thoughts and feelings. * An aversion towards meeting new people, going to unfamiliar places, or doing new things. Introverted kids are perceived as hesitant or shy. If your baby is an introvert, this does not mean that your child is unsociable or abnormal. Almost all introverts, like extroverts, grow up to be successful adults--even geniuses. Like with many traits, your child probably lies in the middle of the introvert/extrovert spectrum. However, if you feel your child is extremely introverted, here are some things to know. Symptoms Highly introverted babies may exhibit one or more of the following behaviors: * Avoidance - Introverts may tend to move away from people, lights, noise, etc. Extroverts, on the other hand, enjoy being with people. Introverts are often perceived to be shy or afraid, when they are actually only hesitant of doing new things or meeting new people. * Territoriality - Introverts generally do not like people intruding into what they consider their space, which includes their bodies, toys, or their beds. * Lack of interaction - Many babies like to spend most of their time alone, and spend limited time in playing or interacting with other children and strangers. * Intense staring - Some introvert babies tend to stare intensely at unfamiliar personalities. Treatment Introversion is not a disorder, and hence there is no "treatment" for it. However, there are certain things you can do to make introvert children more comfortable with their surroundings. * Don't mend when nothing's broken: Trying to alter your child's behavior needlessly may affect the normal developmental process. Do not force any activities on your baby. * Avoid sensory overload: Your baby enjoys peace and tranquility and likes doing one thing at a time. Bright lights, commotion, noise, etc. may be exhaustive for an introvert, and should be avoided. * Respect their space: Introverts like to meet new people and face situations on their own terms. Encourage people handling your baby, such as your babysitter or your friends, to respect your child's space. Introversion is a common behavioral trait characterized on the far end of the spectrum by: a€￠ Constant preoccupation with one's own thoughts and feelings. a€￠ An aversion towards meeting new people, going to unfamiliar places, or doing new things. Introverted kids are perceived as hesitant or shy. If your baby is an introvert, this does not mean that your child is unsociable or abnormal. Almost all introverts, like extroverts, grow up to be successful adultsa€”even geniuses. Like with many traits, your child probably lies in the middle of the introvert/extrovert spectrum. However, if you feel your child is extremely introverted, here are some things to know. Symptoms Highly introverted babies may exhibit one or more of the following behaviors: Can Introverted Real Estate Agents Survive in Todays Market? by Jennifer Allan in Real Estate (submitted 2008-08-07) It is common knowledge that you have to be an extrovert to successfully sell real estate. Charismatic, charming, outgoing, a real people-person. Right? Not so, says Jennifer Allan, a real estate agent, author, trainer and proud introvert. In fact, Allan claims, introverts can sell circles around their extroverted colleagues, as long as they stay true to their personalities. How can that be? A sales career is supposed to be best suited to those with naturally salesy dispositions, who enjoy, as some might say, belly-to-belly interaction with the public, right? Yes and no, according to Allan. She explains. A true sales career, where the salesperson is actually selling a product over and over again probably requires a bit more moxie or aggressiveness than is comfortable for the typical introvert. But a career in real estate sales is much more about managing a complicated process from start to finish and keeping everyone calm and committed during that process. As real estate agents, we do not really sell anything; rather, we act as advisors or consultants to our clients. There is very little actual selling going on. What we do, Allan continues, requires skills that come much more naturally to an introvert. We research, we analyze, we listen, we advise. We organize. We identify and then solve deal-breaking problems. We interact one-on-one with clients, prospects, lenders, inspectors, appraisers and other agents. So, why are introverts typically dissuaded from a career in real estate sales? Allan explains that while introverts can certainly be exceptional real estate agents, they often fall short in their prospecting efforts, thus dooming their careers. We are not natural prospectors, in a traditional sense. We are not comfortable asking for business or taking the chance that we will annoy someone with our sales pitch. When we try to implement the prospecting methods we are taught by our real estate trainers, we fail miserably because those methods simply do not mesh with our personalities. But Allan claims that introverts can generate plenty of business for themselves without venturing out of their comfort zones. I have enjoyed a very successful career for twelve years by being exactly who I am; a reliable, organized, creative, respectful, empathetic introvert. I do very little prospecting; rather I have taught myself how to attract business to me without ever asking for it. It is a beautiful way to make a living. Allans students agree. Jennifer has a sixth sense when it comes to introverts, says Kelly McDonald, a real estate agent in LaGrange, KY. Her indirect approach to generating business has helped me feel more confident as a real estate agent. I can attract business without feeling like I am harassing anyone for it. Fiona Payne, an agent in Delano, MN adds, It is empowering to realize that you do not have to attempt a total personality overhaul to succeed in this business. Allan concurs. It is possible for introverted agents to make gobs and gobs of money selling real estate. But not if they attempt to become someone they are not. Stay true to yourself, and you can succeed, perhaps beyond your wildest dreams. For more information about Jennifer Allans philosophies or products, visit http://www.sellwithsoul.com or contact her at Jennifer@sellwithsoul.com. My pastor used a powerful metaphor in talking about Lessons We Can Learn From The Recession. Stay with me even if you dona€?t believe in God because you may find your own personal power about to be lifted. When we feel positive and confident about our lives wea€?re like a beaker totally filled with clear fluid. When you look closer, there could be sediment at the beaker bottom; like a perceived weakness. Notice when the beaker is bumped that sediment combines with the clearer water and disappears. Why would an introvert want to become more like an extrovert when all the power is already within them?Learning. Jonathan Rauch, author of the timeless Caring for Your Introvert, wrote, a€?I love long conversation and explore intimate thoughts and passionate interests.a€? Doesna€?t going deep and wide on any subject fuel our social skill and need to learn? Take breaks from study certainly; breaks recharge us. A break also has the added benefit of developing other parts of you.Peak productivity. Preferring to work by ourselves we benefit from staying focused, a key in peak performance. When ita€?s time to pull together with a team, we can do it. Yes we have to use those more extroverting social skill that we know, and that may tire us out. Stay focused: you can learn to balance the alone time with team time.Creativity. Our approach is we focus longer and think well on our own, so we have the energy to put out creatively in anything we do. Remember those long term memories we have? And a preference for quiet time to concentrate??? Bring those together for a "creative creativity" to any situation. You don't have to be an introverted CEO to be creative. You can be a CIO - Creative Introvert Officer.Introvert or extrovert, as individuals we are like the fluid and the sediment in the beaker. Why would you want to go from introvert to extrovert, or remove the sediment from the clear fluid? Some would argue, that can't be done anyway. Introverts can learn any skills they need, focus on the task and then as a high school teacher once told me, a€?be quietly effective.a€? Comparing Five-Element Horse Temperament Typing to the Parelli Horsenality Types by Dr. Madalyn Ward in Family / Pets (submitted 2009-08-01) Several people have asked me how the Five-Element horse typing system compares to the Parelli Horsenality system, so here are my thoughts. The Horsenality system is a fantastic system to identify behavior in a horse, and once the behavior has been correctly identified the best way to approach the behavior can be chosen. I believe a horse's Horsenality profile can be influenced by his environment and training. I believe the Five-Element typing system helps identify the underlying temperament of the horse and certain temperaments will have more of a tendency to exhibit one Horsenality profile over another. Here are the Horsenality profiles as described on the Parelli website. I list the general characteristics of each type (i.e., Right Brain/Extrovert), and then compare them to the Five-Element types. ++++ Horsenality Descriptions ++++ <> Horsenality - Right Brain/Extrovert <> Characteristics of a "Right Brained" (RB) Extrovert include being frantic, fearful, and may have a tendency to bolt and rear. RB Extroverts are usually held back and tied down when they are panicky (martingales, nosebands, gag bits, twisted wire, etc) but what they really need is to feel safe and develop trust. <> Horsenality - Left Brain/Extrovert <> Characteristics of a "Left Brained" (LB) Extrovert include being mischievous, energetic, willful, disobedient, domineering, and may have a tendency to be mouthy, nip and bite. LB Extroverts are easy to train unless you are boring and repetitive in which case they act up and become unruly. <> Horsenality - Left Brain/Introvert <> Characteristics of "Left Brained" (LB) Introverts include bored, disinterested, unmotivated, sulls up (stops and won't go forward in defiance), lazy and stubborn and may have a tendency to buck. LB Introverts simply win out by being non-responsive until you give up. This type horse will respond rewards for good behavior and will perform better if he sees a purpose for an activity. <> Horsenality - Right Brain/Introvert <> Characteristics of a "Right Brained" (RB) Introvert include being tense, shy, unpredictable, and may have a tendency to freeze, and then explode. RB Introverts are usually pushed to go forward when they are hesitant and unsure. Slowing down the training until the horse has confidence and understands what he is learning is the way to go with this type. Get more detailed descriptions of each type on the Parelli website: http://www.parelli.com. ++++ How Five-Element Types Compare to Horsenalities ++++ Based on my understanding of the Horsenality system, I would expect a balanced Fire horse to behave most often as a Left Brain/Extrovert. If stressed by rough handling or pain or frightened, the Fire horse could tip into the Right Brain/Extrovert profile and need his trust to be re established. The Earth horse will usually fall into the Left Brain/Extrovert profile. This type horse is very solid and will not likely shift into Right Brain behavior unless severely stressed. The Earth horse can shift to Left Brain/Introverted behavior if he is not treated with kindness and motivated to learn new things. The Metal horse will tend to behave as a Left Brain/Introvert unless he has been pushed to learn too many new things faster than he was able. In this case he can shift to Right Brain/Extrovert behavior, and his training will need to be slowed down until he regains his confidence and shifts back into a less reactive frame of mind, which will allow him to learn. The Water Horse is likely to naturally show up as a Right Brain/Extrovert and with correct handling focused on building trust he can be taught to respond rather than react. The Wood horse tends to behave from the Left Brain side with a full range of Extroverted and Introverted characteristics. If the Wood horse is kept stimulated with new activities and his energy channeled into positive work he can be a very rewarding horse to work with. I feel using these two systems together can be very powerful to not only deal with the behavior you are seeing in the moment and to look under that and see why the behavior is occurring. It the Five-Element type is identified early in the horse's life then he can be handled in such a way as to keep him solid in the positive Horsenality characteristics and less likely to develop an undesirable Horsenality. Knowing your horse's underlying Five-Element type can also help you select the correct Horsenality profile and chose the best actions to take to prevent or correct less than desirable behavior. Computers, Introverts and the Information Age by Susan Dunn in Internet (submitted 2002-06-02) Awhile ago I was researching a topic on the Internet, and found several psychologists saying that extended time spent on the Internet led to depression. Something didn't resonate with me when I read that. I spend a lot of time on the Internet and it energizes me. But then I'm more of an introvert. But I'm only more of an introvert than an extravert, as I spent years in the effervescent fields of marketing and P.R. How so? According to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (M-B), extraverts prefer to interact with people and the outside world. They tend to enjoy the high-energy, outgoing professions like sales and marketing. Introverts, on the other hand, pefer an inner world of concepts and ideas. Their energy comes from quiet thought and introspection. Typical professions for them are writers, lawyers or researchers. But these are only preferences, says Janet Thuesen, co-author of "Type Talk," a book about the M-B. Most introverts manage to act like extraverts when the occasion calls for it, just as left-handed people manage to use the numeric keypad on the computer. Jeb Livingood is a left-handed INFJ who's a full time computer programmer. He did a study of M-B types and their use of computer-mediated communication and came to the important conclusion that introverts are "connected, communicating, and comfortable in cyberspace." In fact, the computer seems almost to have been created for the peace- loving introverts who make up only 25-30% of the population. "It allows them to communicate in their preferred manner," says Livingood, "a written dialogue with time to pause for thought and analysis." It gives them a way to express themselves without what Livingood calls "the growing verbal inferno (cell phones, pagers, teleconferencing) [that] threatens to engulf the world's quieter individuals." On the Internet there are mailing lists for many of the M-B types. There are more than 5 times as many introverts on them as extraverts, Livingood found. "Computers are the friend of the introvert," says Thuesen. "Extraverts often seem too impatient for computers; they get frustrated. They would rather be out talking to someone or performing some action." E-mail allows the deliberative and quieter introvert to respond at their own pace, as they wish, and without interruption. Perhaps more importantly, the Internet allows them to find like-minded individuals across the planet, when 3 out of 4 people they meet aren't like them. Introverts may even have the advantage in today's information society. It might well be depressing to an extrovert to have to crawl inside a computer when they could be outside playing with the guys, but to most introverts, it's a close thing to heaven. Email can be edited too! Be still my beating heart. Confidence A to B! by Frank B in Self Help (submitted 2011-01-31) We all know people who are naturally confident, they are social and extroverted and they are pretty outgoing in all areas of their life. You may be more introverted and "naturally" shy. These confident people are not quite so "natural" as you would think though - you too can make changes and become like this too. Confidence is a skill that anyone can learn. The only difference between you and these "naturally confident" people is that they have learnt the skill from their childhood and received positive reinforcement, whereas perhaps you have faced rejection or criticism previously, and while they continued to be confident and outgoing and receive more positive reinforcement and grow confident you perhaps became more introverted and entered a negative spiral of sinking confidence. Confidence is all in the mind - i.e. in the way you process your thoughts, and importantly your self beliefs. Once you know how to change these patterns of thinking within your mind and re-program your self beliefs then you too will be more self confident. So Tell Me How! Subliminals will access your subconscious mind to make positive changes to these negative self beliefs and unwanted ways of thinking which are holding you back and the root cause of your confidence problems. Steadily they will replace them with positive beliefs and stimulate positive thoughts instead - basically to stop you thinking in the way that you do and to instill the types of ways of thinking shared by these naturally confident people. Can you imagine what it would feel like to not feel uncomfortable in social gatherings, to have the confidence to pursue your dreams Be more confident here - confidenceyconfidencehq.com">confidence Confidence is all in the mind - i.e. in the way you process your thoughts, and importantly your self beliefs. Once you know how to change these patterns of thinking within your mind and re-program your self beliefs then you too will be more self confident. Create A Job Search Plan To Maximize Your Success And Edge Out The Competition by Patricia Erickson in Business (submitted 2009-08-10) With the jobless rate at an all time high, job seekers will have to come up with aggressive strategies to edge out their competition. That means developing a job search plan that does more than mass distribute resumes across the internet. There are many options for job seekers who want to get in front of employers, but developing a solid job search plan is a tried and true method that works well for everyone. What works even better is customizing the job search plan to fit your personality. By that I mean if you're a computer savvy introvert, a personal networking plan probably wouldn't work well for you. A better approach for you would be to work out a strategy that allows you to use e-mail, the internet, and a direct mailing. If you're an extrovert, you might do well with a mix of networking and direct marketing along with hitting up at least fifty of your closest friends to request introductions. Here's what I mean. Check out these five high impact job search strategies: 1. Develop a multifaceted job search plan that includes reaching out to employers through some or all of the following: job boards, resume distribution, groups -news and user, newspapers, journals, business associations, networking, and direct marketing. 2. Carefully select and research your target industry. Get the names, addresses, titles and other pertinent information together and develop a contact list. Look for hiring managers about two steps above you. If you've held a job before, identify your company's chief competitors. Your library will be a great resource to you for much of the information you aren't able to find online. 3. Tailor your resume to the job, the industry, and especially to the employer's needs. If you're applying for a job as an Administrative Assistant, don't use your resume entitled Office Manager. Also, don't use a "one size fits all" type resume as there is no truly effective general resume. Be sure to create a resume that is rich with keywords that are relevant to the job. Reach even more hiring managers with a web portfolio. 4. Follow up with a telephone call a couple of days after you've sent out resumes and cover letters. Don't be afraid to ask for the interview! Have your 30 second pitch ready prior to making your calls. 5. Create a weekly activity log to document how you've done so far. Note the hiring managers you've talked with and the managers you still need to reach. Modify your search as necessary to maximize efforts and effects. Remember, your plan should include challenging expectations and time lines. If you are not working, your job is searching for a job. Right now, your search for employment is your full time job. Follow through on your job search strategy and remain diligent in your search - you'll be sure to edge out the competition! Dating Shyness - How to Overcome Your Shyness When Dating by Michael Lee in Self Help (submitted 2007-10-21) Dating shyness can be an obstacle for people who are timid or introverted. Aside from the natural "players" who circle the dating game as if it's a carnival ride, some people just aren't born lucky. Let's figure out if you have dating shyness or if you're the ultimate natural at the dating scene. Ask yourself these questions. Do you end up being your most boring self on a date? Do you get tongue-tied and out of words? Do you simply sit there and mumble your answers for fear of saying something silly? Then, congratulations! This article is undeniably the one for you. Below are tips on overcoming your dating shyness. I hope you learn enough to get past those first-dates only category. Being naturally shy isn't supposed to be your fault. If you are uncomfortable opening up or sharing too much of yourself too soon, this can work to your advantage. For the opposite sex, you can be mistaken as somebody quite "mysterious". And mystery breeds its own sort of anticipation. Instead of talking about yourself on a date, focus instead on the other person. Don't feign interest; be genuine by being eager to know more about your date. That way, you can remain your shy self, without ruining the date. Ask questions. Be nice and polite. Dating shyness can't be that bad, you don't have to be the Extrovert-of-the-Year to score points on that first date! Figure out what makes you shy. Deal with provoking situations as you would a math problem. Do it a step at a time. If you feel tense being on blind dates and having dinner with a complete stranger, then don't. Why not go into cyber romance first? Get to know somebody by emailing, chatting or even text messaging. If you feel comfortable enough, you can meet up later on, right? That way you wouldn't be too shy once you see him/her up close. So you see, being shy doesn't mean you should miss out on the dating opportunities at your feet. All you have to do is to work your way around dating shyness until it works to your advantage. It's nothing really harmful as long as it's a natural part of your personality. Besides if your date really does like you for who you are, it won't matter if you're outgoing or extremely shy. Dating Tips for Shy People: You Dona€?t Have to Change by Caterina Christakos in Self Help (submitted 2010-03-29) In the world of dating, people who are shy or very introverted often feel left out. The whole dating system is geared toward people who are bold and who seemingly don't mind making fools of themselves on a regular basis. And to make matters worse, all of the dating advice you typically see is directed at these bold and extroverted people, rather than at those of us who have trouble approaching strangers, asking people out on dates, or making compelling date conversation. When it comes to dating, it's time someone start speaking up for the shy. Sadly, the dating articles for shy people that do exist usually boil down to, "Just don't be so shy!" This is just more of our culture's anti-shy bias, and it should be stopped. If you're shy and introverted, there's nothing wrong with you. Luckily, you can date without having to change who you are. 1. Seek other shy people: You're probably not going to get far with someone whose social tendencies are the opposite of yours. There are some extroverted people who enjoy they company of introverts, but they're far more the exception than the rule. Of course, for shy people to find other shy people is the real challenge, isn't it? But it's possible if you follow the rest of these tips. 2. Be active around your interests: This can be difficult, but try to connect with other people by getting out there and doing things that you enjoy doing. For example, if you're into reading or writing, these are things that you can do at your local caf??. If you like to exercise, get out and participate in exercise-related activities like marathons or amateur sports teams, or join a fitness club. 3. Volunteer and join groups: One of the best ways to meet people who share your approach to the world is to volunteer. Particularly if what you volunteer for is related to your interests, you're likely to come across people who are into the same things as you. Or, if there are no good volunteer opportunities right now, check your local listings for groups you can join. 4. Be bold in small ways: You don't have to make big, bold gestures to impress people. Just a little bit of small talk is more than enough to get a relationship off on the right foot. Just act interested in the person. If they ask you questions, follow up with questions of your own. Yes, small talk is not always the most pleasant thing in the world, but don't be afraid to approach small talk in your own unique way. You don't have to be "normal." Just remember that there's nothing wrong with who you are, and that people want to feel that you're interested in them. 5. Let things develop: In these situations or at school or work, you don't have to force anything. If there's someone you're interested in, let your relationship with that person unfold slowly. Again, no big gestures are needed. Just let that person gradually get to know you a little better, and allow yourself to slowly become more comfortable revealing your real self to that person. For shy people, these types of situations, where you see a person over and over again, are ideal, so take advantage of it. There's no rush. There is a common belief that an introvert is a shy person who doesna€?t make friends easily and an extrovert is a person who has good social skills and is not shy. Those are NOT the deciding factors for introversion and extroversion. The core difference is that introverts make their decisions based on their own evaluation of information while extroverts are influenced by what other people say and believe. And it's not likely that one can tell that someone is an introvert or extrovert just because they're friendly or appear happy. Note that most world famous actors and actresses are introverts! There are other differences between the introvert and extrovert states. Inward ThinkingIntroverts are turned inward in their thinking processes. They evaluate what they think and feel and are not concerned with what other people think and feel about something. Extroverts are concerned about what other people think and feel and will not make a decision if it goes against the status quo. This is one of the reasons the sales pitch a€?Everybody is doing ita€? works so well when selling something to an extrovert. An introvert is more likely to say, a€?so what?a€? and evaluate whether it is good for the environment, good for the country, good for the individual. Extroverts dona€?t evaluate information for themselves. They believe the information that other people tell them. Why Extroverts Love People More!Brains of Introverts Reveal Why They Prefer Being Alone | LiveScienceA new study may help explain why extroverts are more motivated to seek the company of others than are introverts.Everybody Has Some Introversion and Some Extroversion Traits Nobody is completely introvert or completely extrovert. One can be introvert when it comes to work and extrovert when it comes to family. One can be introvert in onea€?s religious beliefs but extrovert when it comes to sports. Thata€?s why when one does tests, it will give a percentage, e.g. 54% extrovert and 46% introvert. Introvert LeadersIntroverts sometimes make far better leaders than extroverts. Thata€?s because they have a greater capacity for thinking and tend to look at the outcomes of different policies and laws. On the other hand, extroverts may pay more attention to what their constituents are saying. Introvert Social Skills and Extrovert Social Skills are the SAME! Both introverts and extroverts can have outstanding social skills and both groups love to be with a small group of friends and relate well when with close friends. When someone is unable to make friends, this has nothing to do with whether they are an introvert or an extrovert. It has more to do with shyness which can be a trait of either group. Both introverts and extroverts can be excellent public speakers. By the same token, many world famous performers are introverts. Did you know that Harrison Ford, Clint Eastwood, Meryl Streep, Meg Ryan, Julia Roberts, George Lucas, Christina Aguilera, Enya, Gwyneth Paltrow, Steve Martin, Eminem, Steven Spielberg, and Billy Joel are all introverts? In the world of the famous performer, extroverts include Eddie Murphey, Robin Williams, and Tom Hanks. What is more interesting is the fact that while there are many lists on the web that depict famous introverts, very few depict famous extroverts. There are possibly two reasons for this. The first is that not so many people search for information on extroversion because the extroverts are too busy in the company of others or, alternatively, there just arena€?t too many extrovert famous people because fame depends on a certain depth and extroverts tend to focus on breadth not depth. It might also be because introverts are more likely to be writers while extroverts are too busy talking to each other. Why Extroverts are PreferredThe Tyranny of the ExtrovertsAn essay on what extroverts are better suited to the community.Extroverts Have Many Acquaintances. Introverts have a Few Close Friends. Extroverts have many superficial friends while introverts have a few close friends. Extroverts make great sales people and extrovert consumers are easily sold to. Politicians also tend to fall more frequently into the extroversion field. Some famous extrovert politicians and business gurus include Margaret Thatcher, Sarah Palin, Phil McGraw, Anthony Robbins, and Donald Trump. On the other hand, philosophers, scientists, inventors, and those that are creative tend to be introverts. Introverts are more likely to be gifted than extroverts. Famous introverts in this category include Albert Einstein, Stephen Hawking, and Jane Goodall. And did anybody know that both Mother Teresa and Nelson Mandela are introverts? About half the population is extrovert and the other half introvert. Personality Traits and Characteristics of Introverts and ExtrovertsSo what are the characteristics of extroversion and what are the characteristics of introversion? Extroverts love being in crowds and draw their energy from other people. They are happier than introverts and research shows that their brains structure allows for more sensory input than for introverts. Their sense of smell, taste, sights, touch, and sound tends to be more intense than that of introverts. Interestingly, a recent study showed that extroverts tend to read facial expressions more readily than introverts. Extroverts socialize more and spend more money on everything. Extroverts love constant change and adventure. Introverts are creative, diligent, and guard their privacy. They have a group of close friends and draw their energy from inside. A recent study on introversion revealed that introverts have difficulty in differentiating between expressions on an inanimate object and a live human face. The study suggests that this is the reason introverts dona€?t have much of a desire for the company of others. It has nothing to do with a lack of social skills. Free Ebook! You can download my free ebook here! vote upvote downsharePrintflag Was this Hub ...? Useful (7)Funny Awesome (3)Beautiful (1)Interesting (1)Social Issues: Out of control CEO Salaries Need Formula to Establish Guidelines.Social Issues: No, It's Not Free!CommentsLoading... // dahoglund Level 7 Commenter 4 months ago No surprise to find myself an introvert. I have no desire to 100,000 friends on facebook. On these principle it makes it hard for me to categorize a lot of other folks I know. Up and useful. joyfuldesigns Level 1 Commenter 4 months ago Very interesting. I've always known I'm more of an introvert, but am not shy and enjoy people, just not too many! Nice article! Steve 4 months ago God I'm so introverted but I feel less bad about that having read that!!! MyTMidge 4 months ago For introverts, it's quality vs quantity. Vice versa for extroverts. Sophia Angelique Hub Author 4 months ago Thanks for all comments! :) divacratus Level 2 Commenter 4 months ago I'm an introvert too and I totally agree with what you have to say. We don't generally go by popular opinion and carry an intense discussion within ourselves to find out the truth to any problem. Rafini Level 2 Commenter 4 months ago Fascinating article! I had to come check it out as soon as I saw your post about it - for some reason the topic has always intrigued me. Gregoryy Level 1 Commenter 4 months ago Good points in this article!! Neil Sperling Level 6 Commenter 4 months ago this is an AWESOME informative hub. I really enjoyed it! Bookmarked and rated up! Sophia Angelique Hub Author 4 months ago Thank you everybody for your comments. Much appreciated. :) ctbrown7 Level 2 Commenter 3 months ago Good hub. I think this knowledge is important to know when meeting people. Sophia Angelique Hub Author 3 months ago ctbrown - and it's nice to know about oneself!! :) Storytellersrus Level 7 Commenter 3 months ago Reinforces that I am an introvert because I immediately began to argue with statements presented within your first paragraph, lol. I have studied this a bit myself- wrote a hub on introverts and another titled, Are all Republicans extroverts? I believe Nancy Okerlund is the best reference on the subject of introverts. You might check out her webpage at http://www.introvertenergy.com/nancyokerlund.php. Sophia Angelique Hub Author 3 months ago Storytellersrus. Of course you wanted to argue with me! Introverts are thinkers, aren't they? :) The link doesn't work by the way. MartieCoetser Level 8 Commenter 3 months ago I was categorized ages ago as an inextrovert - 50% introvert 50% extrovert - but Ia€?m sure by now I am more intro as extro. My brain had registered the main difference between the two as the introvert generates energy in solitude for others to drain, while the extrovert generates it in the midst of others to drain when s/he is alone. Sophia Angelique Hub Author 3 months ago Martie - you and me both! I actually swing from about 52% introvert through 58% extrovert to 54% extrovert and 46% introvert. I think it depends on the weather! :) Submit a CommentYou Must Sign In To Comment To comment on this Hub, you must sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages account. Extrovert horses are full of go. Introvert horses are full of whoa. Sounds simple, but it isn't. Extroverts Extrovert horses are the ones that take your eye when you observe a group of horses. It isn't about conformation or color; it is their personalities or, as the Parellis term it, their Horsenalitiesa?￠. They have charisma. They are also ambitious. Intelligent, exuberant, energetic, and all-round athletics are also terms that come readily to mind when describing these horses. These horses can scare the bejesus out of some people with their go, go, go ways. The negative aspect of this type of horse is that this is the horse that runs over you. It will push a person around, going right over top of them if the person doesn't get out of the way or do something to stop the behavior. If frightened flight is their first choice. Run now, then worry about where we are going is their motto. They are also the horses that will bite and use their fore hooves to strike when feeing threatened. The positive side of the extrovert horse is this horse is the one that you want for any sort of racing or games that involve forward movement .If you need speed, endurance, and/or forward movement for your sport you want an Extrovert. They are full of "GO". Their playful intelligence also makes them wonderful companions when they are properly handled. Introverts Do You Have to Be an Extrovert to Find Love Online? by Amy Summers in Entertainment (submitted 2009-09-30) Do You Have to Be an Extrovert to Find Love Online? Autor: janey If you're wondering "Is Internet dating only for extroverts?" wonder no more. In fact, introverts are the ones that may have the most success dating on the Internet. They can go at their own pace, be as cautious as they need to be, maintain their anonymity for as long as they want, and not have to meet anyone or even talk to anyone by phone until and if they are ready. No, Internet dating is most definitely not only for extroverts. Many millions of people use and have used Internet dating, and many thousands of these at least have found the love of their life this way. These Internet daters are both extroverts and introverts. Here are some more statistics about the folks who make a practice of Internet dating. What may surprise you is that three out of every single adult in the United States has used Internet dating at one time or another. This is often because they are introverts or because they are very busy people who don't have the time or inclination for the local bar scene. Women who try Internet dating average about five emails every day they are members of a dating site, while the men only get one or two. What this means is that many of the women on these Internet dating sites are shy and careful, not extroverts at all. Of the males who use the Internet dating sites 40 percent of them admitted to lacking confidence about their first face to face meeting. See, not extroverted at all. Other statistics about these dating sites include the fact that they're much less costly than they used to be. Probably because so many folks are using them that many others are cropping up and the competition has driven the price down. Most women who use Internet dating sites, whether extroverts or introverts, prefer men that are older than themselves. Which is good, as it turns out, because most men who use Internet dating sites are looking for women who are younger than themselves. Not that you know that Internet dating is not only for extroverts, here are some tips for giving it a try. The first thing you need to decide is what you want from Internet dating. Are you looking for a friend, occasional one night stands, a long term partner or marriage? Next find the right site or two or three. Find online reviews of the various sites and find the ones most suited for you. There are sites that are specific to age, religion, geographic region, body size, political views, sports choices and so forth. Choose a site based on what you can afford as well. Assume that it might take you six months to find the right person, especially if you're not an extrovert. Two Internet dating sites are better than just one. It won't cost you more if it takes you half the time by joining two. Even if you are not an extrovert, you can generally meet a few nice people, and perhaps the love of your life, through Internet dating. Do You Have to Be an Extrovert to Find Love Online? by Jane Saeman in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2007-02-12) If you're wondering "Is Internet dating only for extroverts?" wonder no more. In fact, introverts are the ones that may have the most success dating on the Internet. They can go at their own pace, be as cautious as they need to be, maintain their anonymity for as long as they want, and not have to meet anyone or even talk to anyone by phone until and if they are ready. No, Internet dating is most definitely not only for extroverts. Many millions of people use and have used Internet dating, and many thousands of these at least have found the love of their life this way. These Internet daters are both extroverts and introverts. Here are some more statistics about the folks who make a practice of Internet dating. What may surprise you is that three out of every single adult in the United States has used Internet dating at one time or another. This is often because they are introverts or because they are very busy people who don't have the time or inclination for the local bar scene. Women who try Internet dating average about five emails every day they are members of a dating site, while the men only get one or two. What this means is that many of the women on these Internet dating sites are shy and careful, not extroverts at all. Of the males who use the Internet dating sites 40 percent of them admitted to lacking confidence about their first face to face meeting. See, not extroverted at all. Other statistics about these dating sites include the fact that they're much less costly than they used to be. Probably because so many folks are using them that many others are cropping up and the competition has driven the price down. Most women who use Internet dating sites, whether extroverts or introverts, prefer men that are older than themselves. Which is good, as it turns out, because most men who use Internet dating sites are looking for women who are younger than themselves. Not that you know that Internet dating is not only for extroverts, here are some tips for giving it a try. The first thing you need to decide is what you want from Internet dating. Are you looking for a friend, occasional one night stands, a long term partner or marriage? Next find the right site or two or three. Find online reviews of the various sites and find the ones most suited for you. There are sites that are specific to age, religion, geographic region, body size, political views, sports choices and so forth. Choose a site based on what you can afford as well. Assume that it might take you six months to find the right person, especially if you're not an extrovert. Two Internet dating sites are better than just one. It won't cost you more if it takes you half the time by joining two. Even if you are not an extrovert, you can generally meet a few nice people, and perhaps the love of your life, through Internet dating. Don't Be Left Out - The Introvert's Guide To Network Marketing Success by Cameron Outridge in Business / Networking (submitted 2008-12-04) If you consider yourself to be an introvert, you might believe that???by definition???there are some lines of work for which you are simply not suited. One of the most obvious of course would be sales, or anything related to it. If you believe this to be true, you might be precluding yourself from what is arguably the most lucrative business opportunity available today???network marketing. In fact, network marketing is the ultimate business opportunity for introverted people. If you think you???re too shy, or haven???t got what it takes, you???re wrong. There are marketing systems available that will leverage the quiet achievers??? strengths while negating the need to be an in-your-face, over-the-top bore. The network marketing opportunity of today is nothing like Multi Level Marketing (MLM) from 10 or 20 years ago. If you are seeking a legitimate home based business, here is advice for reserved networkers???think about the perfect business opportunity for quiet achievers. Think about network marketing. People all over the world are applying quiet leadership principles to turnkey online marketing systems, and making millions of dollars in the process. Many network marketing opportunities are perfect for the more introverted entrepreneur because they are essentially turnkey, automated marketing systems that allow the quiet leader to get on with building business rather than wasting time telling, selling, sifting and sorting over the phone. You only deal with people once they are hot prospects, and you don???t have to put up with outdated strategies like party plans, door-to-door, cold calling, three-foot rules, badges or rah-rah meetings. Prospecting is completely automated, and you spend your workday in the comfort of your own home, working over the internet. Quite frankly, being an extrovert is over-rated. In his outstanding book on management, Good To Great, author Jim Collins, identifies the greatest companies on Earth. The leaders of these companies combined professional will with personal humility. Top tier direct sales opportunities in particular offer an attractive marketing alternative for people who are less outgoing. That???s because top tier sales commissions are high and a good income model does not require building a huge downline. Everybody knows that pushy salespeople turn people off. The best salespeople are often those whose calm demeanors attract rather than repel prospects. Introverts and extroverts alike need to be prepared for the increasingly hostile economic conditions we are all facing. Today, the shy and quiet leader has a viable alternative to creating bountiful wealth and long-term financial security. Simply find a system that is right for you. The internet makes it possible and your system will make it happen. Lately I've been thinking a lot about the frustration associated with being an introvert. Over the last couple months I've heard from many introverted people who are intelligent, articulate, funny, and very self-aware. Each and every one has demonstrated some level of frustration with the complications that come with being introverted. And that frustrates me. I've been an introvert since the very beginning of my life - ask my mom. Some introverts I know feel that they became introverted over time. One says that he's introverted because of the way he was treated as a child by his father. Some say introverts are born, some say introverts are made, and I'm not here to help anyone decide either way. I've heard some say that in some societies there are no introverts. None. I wholeheartedly disagree with that. Some societies, families, cultures make it nearly impossible for a person to own their introversion because it is so frowned upon. That's truly a pity. I've had people ask me if I feel bad that I'm introverted, as if I am defective. One acquaintance, when I told her that I am an introvert, replied, "Well, at least you're a fun introvert". What the heck was that supposed to mean? I tried to start a dialogue with her about this, but she, being an extrovert, had already gone in a completely different direction with her conversation. I stewed about that comment for a couple days. Some of us end up feeling apologetic for being introverted. What's that about? And there are those introverts that are absolutely mortified at what they are! I'm not sure I understand that. How does a person reach the conclusion that being an introvert is so bad that they feel like it's an affliction or something that they have to change in order to accept themselves or be accepted? Lousy self esteem doesn't go hand in hand with introversion anymore than it goes with extroversion, so I tend to think that those that feel so bad about being introverted probably feel bad that they have brown hair or a pot belly or small feet or blue eyes too. We're all made with differences. Why, in the 21st Century, would any of us feel so desperate to fit in that we feel the need to change our basic being? Let's have a discussion about self-esteem and introversion then. I know lots and lots of extroverts with very low self-esteem, and I know a lot of introverts with low self-esteem. Since I am an introvert, and I care deeply about helping all people have a better understanding of introversion, I will address self-esteem issues that are more associated with introversion. First off, there are more extroverts in the world than introverts. The world is more geared towards extroverts. The world also tends to view anything different as suspicious. Out of lack of information on the part of some extroverts, introverts are often viewed as shy, less intelligent, loners, no fun, plotting, secretive, cold, harsh, aloof. Considering that introverts are a minority, these unflattering labels can be rather difficult to shake. But what's really sorry is when an introvert for some reason, actually buys into these assumptions and labels and begins to think they have some sort of problem! I would assert that introverts should be countering those incorrect notions by correcting them. As a group, we are no more or less shy, intelligent, fun, plotting, harsh or cold than extroverts. None of these characteristics can be associated exclusively with either group. What about aloofness, being a loner and secretiveness? Because introverts live more in an "inner" world - thinking, analyzing, planning, wondering, listening, and extroverts live more in an "outer" world - talking, moving, being more spontaneous, introverts do often come off as aloof and secretive. And since introverts are very comfortable alone, we can also seem to be loners. We tend to talk less and listen more. Just a normal variation of how we express ourselves, nothing negative there. If you're feeling bad about yourself because you're an introvert, I would invite you to learn more about what introversion is and is not and honor your uniqueness. Introverts are deep-thinkers, sensitive, and self-directed. When we're at our best, we are creative, practical, intuitive, intelligent, compassionate and kind. We are also decisive and quietly assertive. Our unembellished speech can lead to clear, concise communication with others, and our analytical ability helps us make sound decisions. It's true that if we gave in to the temptation to hide ourselves away for a bit of solitude that we can get caught in that and never come out of our "cave". And that's no more healthy than an extrovert never, ever learning to enjoy peace and quiet and their own company. Each side of the spectrum needs to have balance in order for emotional health. Here are some characteristics that are common to introverts, and are completely acceptable and normal ways of being: Introverts recharge themselves with peace and quiet. Too much social activity, noise, partying, or visits from the neighbors exhaust us and will send us looking for alone time. Introverts tend not to talk a lot in social situations or business meetings and the like. We like to have time to think about what's being discussed before we jump in. Often when we do speak up, our thoughts are presented in compact sentences - we like to get to the point. It's hard for us to follow conversations that ramble and jump - our brains work differently than an extrovert's - the chemicals that aid in thought processes literally take a different path. Introverts tend to be quite sensitive to outside stimuli such as noise and activity. Introverts spend lots of time in introspection and quiet contemplation - we are generally a very insightful, sensitive bunch of people. Introverts also tend to have a very large "personal space". We usually need to know someone pretty well before voluntarily giving them a hug. It's true that society seems to value people who are very outgoing and gregarious more so than us quiet, mysterious types. But it's up to us to help educate ourselves and others about introversion and to accept ourselves as a different, yet valuable minority that offers another facet to the gem of humanity. Let's celebrate ourselves, whether introverted or extroverted, and let's celebrate all our wonderful differences! Emphasize Your Uniqueness To Boost Your Results! by Martina Srblin in Business / Entrepreneurship (submitted 2010-01-13) Being a multi-passionate entrepreneur may leave you in a pretty confused spot sometimes - it happens when you're trying to do a zillion things at the same, struggling to find a business/private life balance, even engaging in new activities, because you're so wonderfully passionate about so many things... So sometimes, being so busy and dividing your attention among so many attention-grabbers, you lose a realistic notion of yourself and your uniqueness. That needs to change! By embracing your uniqueness and focusing on who you are instead of who you are not, or at least not yet, you'll be more effective, more magnetic, more - you, the happiest, most inspiring and empowered you. You only need to take 3 easy steps and you'll be on your way to an incredible results boost! Know yourself inside out Do you know yourself? Really know yourself? For example, can you list your top 10 values? Are you aware of your mindset? In depth? Being an expert on yourself builds the foundation for effective and efficient marketing, genuine and fulfilling relationships, a flourishing business, the desired lifestyle - it's the starting line for pretty much everything you do. So ask yourself: Which experiences molded you into who you are now? What are your most characteristic personality traits? Are you an introvert or an extrovert? What are you looking for in a business partner, coach, client? What kind of legacy would you like to leave behind? What's your bigger purpose in life? There are countless questions, but there really is one answer to each one of them that is unique to you. Find it. Love it. Use it. Make sure everything you do is in alignment with who you are Even if this means undergoing major shifts in your business and in your life, don't settle for living in disharmony with the true you. Being happy is all about being in alignment with who you are deep inside. Check out if your business(es) reflect(s) you and everything you discovered by taking Step 1. How do your values manifest themselves in different aspects of your life? Are there parts of it that undermine those values, go against your deepest rooted personality features, or hinder the realization of your life mission? Be crudely sincere. It's scary, but it's worth it. Market smarter, not (just) harder The third step in celebrating your being special involves marketing. Gift yourself with a home-made marketing makeover by getting crystal clear about your target market (it should be well defined and starving for your services/products), your core message (which problems do you solve and what kind of solution/transformation you offer), and your signature system (the one you take your clients/customers through to experience the transformation they've paid for). Base everything on your unique set of skills, passions, communication style, character, beliefs, etc. In short, start speaking your voice and living your truth. Your marketing will ???smarten up??? in the process, you'll get more results with less effort, and you'll attract your ideal clients. The clients that love and appreciate your uniqueness. As much as now, hopefully, you do, too. "Ways to Help Your Child Be More Social"; while some parents might consider this important or even critical information, I must confess that this topic actually fills me with a sense of dread. Why? Because I would characterize myself as an introvert and can vividly recall the painful process my parents subjected me to as a child all in the name of "drawing me out." No doubt my parents had the best of intentions, but what bothers me about the whole crusade to designed to "help" an introverted child to be more social is that it seems to start with the premise that introversion is somehow abnormal. I actually believe that the opposite is true; attempting to push, prod or force a naturally introverted individual to "get out there and be social" can do way more harm than good. Neuroscience researcher and author Marti Olsen Laney has written a number of books on the subject including, "The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child" and "The Introvert Advantage." It is interesting to note that her research has uncovered the fact that while introverts are a distinct minority in the general population (around 30%) they make up about 60% of the gifted population. She also offers a number of useful tips to parents on the most positive ways to foster appropriate social skills in more introverted children. EXTRAVERTS HAVE all the luck. For us Introverts, it can be a painful experience. The last of the guests of my grandson's second birthday party just left and I am exhausted!! And, I hardly did any of the work in preparing for the party or, in conducting the party. My wife and step-daughter, the mother, prepared most of the food and the father did the heavy duty meat BBQing; I did some minor site-prep and chores in the morning then retreated to work and got out of the way. The pool was opened and festivities started at 2 PM, with family and friends showing up then and later; childern and adults; around 30 to 35. Dinner was at 4 PM and it was all over by about 8 PM; it is now about 8:47 PM. I am just now recovering. All of the people there are familiar to my wife and step-kids, I am the outsider, although I now have had three years to get acquainted; my fault, an occupational hazard of an introvert. Myers-Briggs has a good write-up on what extroverts and introverts are all about but one rule-of-thumb is that extraverts draw energy from people and introverts spend energy on dealing with people; I spend a lot of energy dealing with people when the count goes over two; there were over 30 there, OMG! To aviod seeming like too much of a stick-in-the-mud, I tried to pace myself and went outside to visit, as was expected of me, but, not in my nature. Periodically, I would retreat inside when my power levels ran to recharge. I took a long dip in the pool, which was safe because I just float around and just watch what was going on without having to interact to much. At one point, I disappeared into the bedroom for about 10 minutes to get far away, so to speak. At one point, I was standing inside, looking outside at all of those extroverts interacting,having a good time. Well, not everyone was. There were some other obvious introverts sitting around watching, but not many; besides not being party-people we are a minority in America as well. Anyway, they were obviously having a good time, and I found myself thinking that I was envious at how much they were enjoying themselves while I was inside trying to replace the energy I once had which they now possessed. It is no joke that, for introverts, functions like this can suck the life right out of you; this is an idea that is totally incomprehensible to an extrovert; they have no baseline to understand this, at least in terms of people. For you extroverts (except ENTPs though, you already understand us INTPs) reading this, try contemplating being entertained spending five hours in solitary confinement with a book you think you would like, exciting, eh? Well, that is how introverts see parties. But, time out with a good book, for an introvert, is not necessarily a bad deal. To a lot of introverts, this alienation from parties is not fun; it is not a good thing; in fact, it is often downright depressing, which might explain why we might seem "unfun". The reason we might seem this way is because we aren't "happy" due to the very fact that we can't "naturally" have fun in these situations. We spend so much of our energy mingling, trying for make-up things to talk about, in general, socializing and trying to look like we are having a ball, all those things extroverts are sooo damned good at.at it that, we Introverts become totally exhausted from the effort! Then, to add salt to the wounds while we are attempting to do the above, "center-of-the-party" Sally comes over to a clearly distressed Mark and drags us over to some of her friends, ones we don't know (fortunately, I knew almost everybody at our party). This gesture actually can be helpful, if Sally knew what our problem is and understands it. Introverts survive much better at parties, or at least I do, when guided through them or put with people they know well and/or have similar interests. But, in this case, Sally doesn't. She soon flits to the next group, as extroverts do, leaving us to fend for ourselves with strangers who care less about what we care about; disaster; depression; all we want is to go home; ahhhh, the life of an introvert. Extroverts simply do not understand that introverts have absolutely no control over this personality characteristic; we are left-handed in a right-handed world and there is no changing that, period, so you learn to cope; I retreat, before entering the fray again to do my host's duty. I hope you enjoyed this little stream of conscience while I had the idea. It was a wonderful party; my wife, step-daughter, and step-son did a fantastic job putting it together and putting it on for their grandson and son, respectively. It was wonderful seeing how many of the family and friends (even a few of the men) that attended pitch-in and help with party chores during the term of the activities and how much work they did; it really took a load off my immediately family. NY Times #1 Best Selling Book. Also See Clark on CNN HLN (I have personally saved more than the purchase price using his tips.)Clark Howard's Living Large in Lean Times: 250+ Ways to Buy Smarter, Spend Smarter, and Save MoneyAmazon Price: $10.19 List Price: $18.00Related HubsA Failure to Communicate - Myers-Briggs MBTI to the ...FOR those of you expectantly waiting on the edge of your seat for another hard-hitting, fact-laden, logically indestrutable diatribe against some new or old Conservative assault on us poor Progressives this writer is famous for (if you haven't read..How to Develop Your Own Personality? Understand Your...It seems to me that before you can hope to My Son-In-Laws Birthday PartyIt's our turn to arrive, My wife and I To feast and celebrate another fine year gone by - We carry the cake, carrot cake, his favorite into the house The gin and mixer we had was for the ladies - I wandered outside to see the...vote upvote downsharePrintflag Was this Hub ...? Useful (1)Funny Awesome (1)Beautiful (2)Interesting (2)Social Issues: Drug Testing Welfare Recipients in Florida, Fair or Not?Social Issues: How to Develop Your Own Personality? Understand Yourself First Using Myers-Briggs MTBI [8]CommentsLoading... // My Esoteric Hub Author 4 days ago Thanks for reading and commenting WBA. What is even worse, we are a distinct minority to boot. BTW, I am barely a T, but am firewalled on the other three. wba108@yahoo.com Level 6 Commenter 4 days ago This is exactly like I feel at a party, it sucks the life out of me and I can't wait to leave most of the time. I'm an introvert in a family of extroverts and they always think I have a problem because I tend to keep to myself. I'm close to your personality except I tested as an INFP.-WBA My Esoteric Hub Author 4 weeks ago Oh boy, can I relate, thank you, Anaya. Anaya M. Baker Level 4 Commenter 4 weeks ago Ah, the woes of introversion! Over the years I've gotten better at the functions thing, but still tend to avoid them at all costs. While I always enjoy a small lighthearted gathering, maybe with close friends and bottles of wine, the whole small talk, meet and greet makes me want to lobotomize myself. I've found having a buddy seems to help--someone that you can run off to whenever I'm totally overwhelmed. I usually interrupt the current, generally completely uninteresting conversation of party-buddy, and make them go outside and hide behind a tree with me. Then I chain smoke cigarettes like I'm in high school, then worry that everyone can smell it, then ask how soon we can leave. There's my rant, haha! Submit a Comment // 0) { ele.value = ele.value.replace(/^(h*t+p\/*(:|;)\/*)(w*\.*h*t*p*\/*(:|;)\/*)?/i, "http://"); if (ele.value.match(/^[A-Za-z0-9\.-]{1,}\.[A-Za-z]{1}/)) { ele.value = "http://" + ele.value; } } com.testForError((ele.value && ele.value.length 0 && !ele.value.match(/^((http|https|ftp):\/\/)*[A-Za-z0-9\.-]{1,}\.[A-Za-z0-9]{1}/i)), ele, 'You have entered an invalid URL.'); } }); com.errorHeader = ''; com.submitUri = '/xml/comment.php'; com.nextUri = null; // save a reference to original com to support multiple // comment modules on a page com_15774908 = com; // ]] Members and Guests Sign in or sign up and post using a hubpages account. Name: Comment: jQuery(function(){jQuery("#comment_submit_15774908").attr("disabled","");});No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinkedComments are not for promoting your Hubs or other sitescom.observe(); jq(document).ready(function() { jq('#comment_submit_15774908').click(function() { var btn = this; btn.disabled = true; setTimeout(function() {btn.disabled = false;}, 1500); com_15774908.save(); return false; }); }); In contemporary psychological terms, "extrovert" is used to describe individuals whose temperament type or preference directs and receives their energy from external sources. In the practical sense, they are action people who plug into others for their juice. They're not generally drawn to reflection, they are "doers." Talking things out is an extrovert's way of understanding, solving problems, reducing stress, sharing, and communicating. I am less likely to say to myself, "what are they really thinking?" when working with an extrovert. These individuals prefer, and work well in, group projects. They can be visible leaders because they easily tolerate, in fact often enjoy, attention. They represent between 60 -70% of the population, though they are more prevalent in certain professions such as sales, teaching, and corporate middle management. Some famous extroverts are Bill Clinton (Hillary is an introvert), Ronald Regan (Nancy is an introvert), Steve Martin (no idea who his partner is), and Mark Twain (ditto), Sam Walton was an extrovert, and Warren Buffet is an introvert. You get the picture. In the workplace, extroverted bosses will pull together their staff for group meetings, advocate for a bullpen office layout, place their desks in the center, or face their workstation looking out at "the troops." Talking to all levels will get them the energy and information they need. Employees will generally know where they stand with an extroverted leader, though they may not always be thrilled with the directness and sometimes see their manager as aggressive or gruff. An extroverted boss will be quick to initiate change, want action "now," and ask you to plunge into the work, especially if he/she senses demands from outside their area. "Keep me posted," "Let's talk it out," "Take a big picture view of it," will be expressions of the need for the individual as much as the requirements of the work. Isolate and the extrovert will think something is wrong. They will attempt to pull you out or distract you. "The silent treatment" can be torture for an extrovert and a devise that should be used sparingly by those who want their way. If you have extroverts working for you, you'll see them more often than your introverts. They'll "stop by" and "check-in" sometimes just to draw a bit of energy from you. Input and weigh-in are important to extroverts, so it's essential you ask them their take; outside opinions are generally sought and welcomed. When conflict arises, an extroverted employee will want to address it immediately, openly, and prefer face-to-face over the written word. They will press you to state your position, even if you admit you need to "think it over." You'll know more personal information about your extroverted employee. They're more likely to socialize with people in the workplace and expect you to do so as well. Extroverts run the risk of speaking before thinking. The talk, think, talk syndrome can get them in trouble when they blurt out a reaction or are too quick with a reply. Encouraging an extrovert to silently play through their response can be an enormous buffer to their natural inclination. Teams that have a mix of introverts and extroverts do best, provided the extroverts allow the introverts time to think before they speak and the introverts don't dismiss extrovert comments and calls for action as bravado or stealing the limelight. In my corporate experience, it was easiest to identify the extroverts when we had our annual sales meeting. To begin with, most of the attendees were line managers who dealt with the public and large staffs all day, every day. They talked, directed, cajoled, and paroled their entire workday. The sales floor was their stage; ideal for most extroverts. Gather hundreds of them in a ballroom and you'd have a deafening noise level, people standing on chairs yelling with an enthusiasm that only escalated as the program progressed. The biggest agenda mistake anyone could make was to have a financial update (on a long PowerPoint deck, no less) or some other form of operations mandate, midday. Listening was not this group's forte and when they were revved, they didn't want to give it up. I could always spot the introverts. They often sat in the back of the room, generally with the other introverts, many of whom were top management, IT people, and the accountants. When the noise level rose, they covered their ears or took copious notes for distraction. They would sneak out to the restroom for a reprieve. Not that they weren't interested or excited it was the others' expression of it that was literally wearing them out. At the end of the day's program there would be a break before dinner (another wild celebration). The extroverts would travel to the bar or lobby and with great animation, and much debate, talk the day's events out. The introverts ran to their rooms for cover and to recover. Both groups were then refreshed for the next segment of the evening. Extroverts appear to rule the world (they are the majority) and play an important role in any organization. They're often misunderstood by those less extroverted or by introverts. Allowed to express and draw energy can have a very positive effect on the workplace. Misplaced or misused, they can use their outward focus for negativity and sabotage. That's a quick overview and generalization of the extroverted type. Now here's your challenge. Knowing what you have taken from this article and the one on introverts: How would you type yourself? Your Boss? Your employees and coworkers? What would be the best role for the extroverts on your team? In times of change or stress, who should do what, when? If you are picking your "Dream Team," who would be the extrovert you would draft, and what role would he or she play? Knowing temperament type is a powerful tool. Extroversion and introversion are but two of the components that make up the profile. (c) Jane Cranston. Face To Face Negotiation by James Luis in Health (submitted 2011-06-17) In our age of ever-increasing communication prospects, researchers have been drawn to answer the query of which communication mode is most certainly to lend itself to successful negotiation. Though the reply is undetermined, Face-to-face communication has been proven to have a higher possibility of assuaging miscommunication. If you're in particular person, you are more apt to pick up all the nuances of the exchange. That way, you will be higher capable of gauge what the other celebration is considering and to find out the direction during which the negotiating is headed. For a similar reasons, it is usually easier to create and maintain rapport. If there's already a good quantity of stress in the air, nonetheless, negotiating by telephone can take the sting off, can provide respiration room and might decrease the effectiveness of any strain tactics which will have been employed. E-mail's principal advantage is that both parties have control over saying exactly what they wish to say and the way they wish to say it. Since there isn't an ebb and move to stay conversation, the concerned parties can preserve the ground as long as they want. On the flip side, e-mailing can are inclined to make the negotiating parties less restrained and extra impulsive of their communication. This rashness isn't all the time a bad factor, however it positively will be if tensions exist. One research found that abrupt and unmannerly exchanges occurred 102 occasions when negotiating via e-mail as opposed to solely 12 times when negotiating face-to-face. Understanding Character Directions A character path is the way during which we lean more often than not by way of the way in which we act and react to most stimuli. We hate to be boxed in and categorized, however the reality is, more often than not we're predictable. Certain, folks aren't going to be one hundred pc predictable all the time, however the extra discerning you turn into, the extra you will note how predictable individuals actually are. If you analyze persona instructions, ask your self the next questions: I. Is your audience principally logical or emotional? A. Logical individuals: 1. Think with their heads 2. Go with what makes sense 3. Are persuaded by information, figures and statistics 4. Depend on previous historical past 5. Use their five senses B. Emotional individuals: 1. Think with their hearts 2. Go along with what feels proper 3. Are persuaded by feelings 4. Rely on instinct 5. Use their "sixth sense" II. Is your viewers introverted or extroverted? A. Extroverted folks: 1. Love to speak 2. Are talkative 3. Contain others 4. Are usually public people 5. Want face-to-face contact B. Introverted folks: 1. Preserve their feelings inside 2. Hear more than they discuss 3. Like to work solo 4. Are typically private 5. Use memos and e-mails over face-to-face communication III. Is your viewers motivated extra by inspiration or desperation? A. Desperation-motivated individuals: 1. Try to get away from the issue 2. Are stuck previously, are afraid of repeating mistakes 3. Avoid pain 4. Want to get away from one thing B. Inspiration-motivated folks: 1. Work towards a solution 2. See a better future 3. Are motivated by pleasure 4. Wish to transfer forward, have vision IV. Are your viewers members or prospects assertive or amiable? A. Assertive people: 1. Think about outcomes more vital than relationships 2. Make choices rapidly 3. Wish to be in management 4. Are activity-oriented 5. Do not waste time 6. Are impartial B. Amiable people: 1. Take into account relationships extra important than outcomes 2. Are pleasant and dependable 3. Like to construct relationships 4. Are great listeners 5. Avoid competition 6. Are nonassertive and agreeable The extra you understand persona instructions, the better you will be able to customise your negotiation tactics. Every particular person's persona direction will dictate how you customise your message. We all know there are two personality styles that are polar opposites of each others, right? I wish it were that simple. Introversion and extroversion are on a line, a continuum. Sometimes people will be strongly to one side or the other on that continuum, but often people exhibit mixed tendencies, especially in a group setting where there is rapport and trust. For example, an introvert might be shy around new people, but very gregarious around his mastermind group where he's been brainstorming for six months. So let's define what we mean by these terms: An introvert gets energy by being alone, and expends energy when in a group setting, like a mastermind group. Being an introvert doesn't mean a person is shy; it means he needs quiet time alone to process the outcome of the mastermind group meetings and recharge his batteries before he wants to get back into the group mode again. An extrovert gains energy when she is out in the world, especially brainstorming with a group of people. She's excited to share ideas and to process her thoughts verbally in the group. Sometimes she gets her best ideas and come up with her own solutions while talking through a problem with other people. How do you facilitate a mastermind group that includes both types? An introvert needs quiet time, even a minute or two, to collect his thoughts and reactions to a given problem or situation. Giving the entire group a few minutes to write down their ideas on their own, before sharing, can give the introvert the space he needs to process. On the other hand, the extrovert needs time to talk out loud, to process her thoughts while she's actively communicating with others. Knowing this, you can allow the extrovert a few minutes more during her Hot Seat to explain her situation: she just might find clarity or even solve her problem herself, simply by talking openly about it. Between meetings, give each of these types a way to communicate with the entire group, possibly through an online message forum. The extrovert will appreciate the ongoing connection to the group and the introvert can take his time to process internally, then communicate at his leisure. How can you tell if a mastermind group member is an introvert or an extrovert? It's not possible to pigeon-hole someone and label them as "all introvert" or "all extrovert," but there are tendencies to one side or the other that you can (and should) pay attention to: an introvert makes more and sustained eye contact an extrovert will appear energized by being in the group situation an introvert will appear to think before they speak an extrovert jumps right into the conversation and thinks while they speak an introvert may disappear during coffee breaks, or talk deeply with one person an extrovert will enjoy talking to 3 or 4 people in a group during coffee breaks an introvert may seem shy around the group in the beginning, until he gets to know everyone better an extrovert will interact with everyone in the group, even in the beginning, because she loves to meet new people As a mastermind group facilitator, being aware of these two personality types and giving each what they need will foster a tight, powerful group. Find Out Why You Need LSD To Learn Fluent Spanish by Paul W. Brown in Education (submitted 2008-04-17) Everyone wants to learn Spanish the easy way, but we have to be realistic and not delude ourselves to think that motivation and desire are not needed, they are the two things that will keep your discipline and perseverance in check. But the 3 often-overlooked activities of students are that you need to Listen, Speak and Do. LISTEN - Silence Is Golden If you want to learn to speak fluent Spanish, you have to be able to come in direct contact with Spanish in effective and practical ways such as listening to Spanish and or Latin music. How often do we find ourselves singing along to our favorite songs because we know the words? We are able to remember the lyrics to our favorite songs without memorizing because we hear them over and over again. The same principle of repetition should be applied to Spanish music CDs in order for you to learn Spanish rapidly. There is a lot of excellent Spanish music available--you simply need to choose you favorite Latin, Spanish CD and play it often. Overtime you will be singing along in Spanish. By listening to these CDs you will be able to consciously and subconsciously process Spanish in a way that can contribute to your learning of Spanish. This way is effective because it beats sitting in a boring classroom and you can choose your medium (films, television, music) in which to listen to Spanish. It is practical because we all enjoy music of some kind and even though Spanish music may not be your thing, with your CD player, mp3 or iPod you can listen anytime, anyplace, anywhere. SPEAK - Hear Me Roar We all need to express ourselves. Studies show that introverted students, who would avoid interaction with the native speakers, have difficulty in language acquisition and proficiency in comparison to the extroverted students who would take advantage of any opportunity to speak the language. If you are the introvert, then I highly recommend, it is high time for you to blossom. Just the lack of practice will make introverts less likely to fully acquire Spanish. The more often you try to speak Spanish, you will be forcing your brain to process your learning of syntax, semantics, pronunciation, grammar, etc. and to put that information to practical use. So be brave like a lion and go out there and speak Spanish as often as you can because as Hermann Hesse says "everything becomes a little different as soon as it is spoken out loud." DO - God Helps Those Who Helps Themselves You must have or find an excellent Spanish course. You need to have a good foundation in order to build on that. You could sign up for one of the many language schools that use the traditional language-teaching techniques, which research has indicated are extremely inefficient, to learn Spanish. Or you could hire a private tutor or learn how to speak Spanish online. Whatever your option, the resources are there for you to choose the right method of learning. Keep in mind that learning Spanish online can be more effective, practical, convenient and affordable than your typical language school and less expensive and resource-rich than a private tutor. But you have to do the lessons, the speaking, the listening, and things to keep you motivated. If you do you will succeed in increasing your Spanish vocabulary and use of words in new contexts, which stimulate a deeper understanding of their meaning. Finally, if you are given effective learning tools, resources and instruction from your Spanish course and you remember your L.S.D., you will be able to more learn Spanish easily, effectively and practically. You will eventually reach your goal and be able to speak Spanish fluently. First Date Conversation for Introverts by Caterina Christakos in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2010-03-18) Some people are comfortable in any social situation. To them, the idea of planning date conversation in advance may seem ridiculous. These lucky people are somehow able to go with the flow, come up with funny jokes on the spot, and are never at a loss for things to talk about. Don't you hate these people? Why does everything have to be so easy for them? Okay, let's set our feelings of resentment aside for a minute. Some people are extroverted, and some people are introverted. Everyone knows that, and there's no shame in being either one. But, for introverts, things like dating can be torture. As bad as rejection is, there's an almost equally upsetting feeling of dread that sets in as soon as our date invitation is accepted. Speaking as an introvert myself, I know that some of us are capable of turning perfectly normal situations into scenes of awkwardness for everyone involved. It's sort of a special talent. So we enter situations like this with fear. But on a date, the last thing we want is to have another one of those awkward scenes that most introverts are accustomed to. We want a date to be different. Without compromising who we are, we want a date to be fun, free, and light, and we also want to make a good impression. Try to keep these things in mind, and you'll be on your way to a good start. 1. Mental preparation: Make a list of things to talk about, and memorize it. Don't be ashamed to use internet research to find topics, but also be sure to keep in mind anything you know about your date, and tailor your conversation topics to him/her. Just by doing this little bit of preparation, you'll enter the situation with more confidence. 2. Avoid the usual topics: Sure, questions such as "How do you like your job?" or "What did you study in school?" are fine to have as standbys, but they're a little too commonplace. A good rule of thumb is to avoid asking questions that your grandma would ask. Stick with things that are more interesting and open-ended. 3. Improvise: Improvisation can be difficult for introverts, but it's a good idea to listen closely to the things your date has to say for any opportunity take the conversation in unexpected directions. If s/he says something that surprises you, ask follow-up questions. Without being creepy or invasive, try to come out of the experience feeling like you know a few interesting and meaningful things about your date. 4. Don't just ask questions: Also, look for opportunities to talk about yourself. You don't want your date to think that you're hiding anything. If it helps, as part of your mental preparation, make a list of things that are interesting about you, and subtly play up those qualities. 5. Believe in yourself: Dating experts always say to be confident, but that's easier said than done. The more important point is just to trust who you are. You don't have to try to make yourself more interesting. This person is on a date with you because s/he sees something in you, so don't ruin it by pretending to be someone else. 6. Drink up, but not too much: Everyone knows that alcohol can be a great social lubricant, but be careful: It can also make you look like a fool. First Week at Campus and What to Expect by Alfred in Education / College and University (submitted 2010-03-26) You have enrolled in a university. Be it a campus, or a college. It is tertiary education. Time to be really independent. Although many of you in high school had already decide many things on their own already. In fact, campus is like a 'training place' for oneself. It is said that the journey towards oneself is the furthest. True. This is often the criteria talked about by successful people in life. Observing yourself and really knowing your strengths and weaknesses is one of the things you conceive. Subconsciously or not. Take socializing, for example. The extrovert will find it a joy to be in new environments, especially one like a campus. Novelty of things, people, and many other life aspects is such a turn on. On the other hand, the introverts will most likely find campus to be another alien space. With the bound to succeed or fail mindset, some quiet ones do blossom into decent talkers. Note that I am just making a generalization here. Almost everyone will be nervous up to some level. Feeling insecure is the norm. Being away from home miles away is one thing, while being alone in a new territory is another. Alliances are formed usually. Groups with similar interests or people having good rapport. By the way, rapport is always the key to starting anything at campus. Need a help? You have to know this person. Want to ask something? You have to be 'close' to some amount to be asking him or her. A simple hi and how are you doing is reliable to break the ice. Most cases, everyone is also nervous themselves. Other than these being said, first week of campus life is truly exciting. At least, for an introvert like me, 5 years back. What I can say about varsity life is this. It is like a journey. A journey towards what you want. Sometimes, I did not know what I had wanted. Sometimes, goals differ from periods of time. You know what? These uncertainties, these doubts, these mistakes and social goofs, will bring you forward towards a better you. There is no turning back. Life can only get better. Trust on this principle and you will do fine. Flirting Tips for Shy Girls - How to Flirt No Matter How Shy You Are by Michael Lee in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2008-06-09) In this article, you'll discover some great flirting tips for shy girls. But first, imagine this scenario. A cute guy is drinking all by himself at the bar. You're alone and spot him giving you a little smile. A moment later, he turns his head to look at you again with inviting eyes. He's obviously flirting with you. Will you: a. Smile back at him and raise your drink in a private toast b. Cross your legs and tuck a few strands of hair behind your ear c. Look away and keep your eyes on your drink the whole time If you answered a or b, I assume you've done this whole routine before. If you're among the lot who answered c, either there's a dancing man in your glass or you're one shy girl. If it's the latter, then you are in desperate need of help. "Flirting tips for shy girls? Is there such a thing?" you might ask. "Is that even an option?" Yes, there is such a thing as flirting tips for shy girls. You won't find them easily in the library though. First of all, you have to erase the idea that shy girls can't flirt. They say flirting is an art. And like art, flirting cannot be boxed into a single style. Be yourself. You don't have to wear a plunging neckline to be sexy. Remember the quote: "Different strokes for different folks." Besides, do you really want to be like all the other girls? Don't be too tense. Calm yourself down before making any move; or else, you risk making awkward smiles and stiff hand movements. Relax for a minute and enjoy your drink. Guys are always on the lookout for girls who are comfortable with themselves. Practice smiling in front of the mirror. Shy girls tend to make small smiles, which go almost unnoticed. This flirting tip for shy girls works wonders. Once a guy spots you with a great smile, he will automatically feel more confident to approach you. Don't be afraid to start a conversation. When he finally approaches you, talk as if you're with a friend. Once you're in the zone, sliding into flirting territory will feel more natural. You may find it hard to believe, but these flirting tips for shy girls are easy and simple to apply. You should be able to enjoy the moment and the teasing conversation. Believe that you're a great woman inside out. Honestly, these flirting tips for shy girls aren't that much different from other seduction methods. Whether you're an introvert or extrovert, you can apply these seduction techniques so other people will see how fabulous you are! From Introvert To Extrovert In 4 Easy Steps by Michael Lee in Self Help (submitted 2011-05-26) Why would you want to change from introvert to extrovert? Obviously, it's tough being an introvert. You'll feel shy and awkward. You'll find it hard to approach strangers and introduce yourself. You'll feel awkward in social situations. Being an introvert sure can complicate your life. Your performance in school, your job and career, your relationship with friends and co-workers - these can all suffer. Transformation, though, is easier than it sounds. Here are four easy steps to change from introvert to extrovert. Step 1: Realize That You Can Change. Being an introvert is a learned behavior, a process, a habit. But it's not a life sentence. It???s not genetic, but a result of faulty programming as you were growing up. To change from introvert to extrovert, the first thing you have to do is to acknowledge the fact that you are an introvert; then recognize that you can change to an extrovert with the right attitude and determination. Step 2: Find Out The Cause. Again, emphasis on the fact that no one is born shy. There???s usually a pattern that leads to your introvert behavior. What triggers it? Is it a thing, a person, or situation? What makes you uncomfortable? Whatever makes you lose your confidence, it???s important that you know it so you can beat it. Step 3: Prepare And Practice. On your own, simulate a situation that you find awkward, then think of how you can walk yourself through it. Think of different scenarios and then make strategies on how you can deal with them. Practicing helps prepare you and builds your self-esteem little by little. Even when you fake it at first, eventually you will make it. Step 4: Believe Anyone who believes he or she is an introvert will really become one. Thinking that way won???t help you at all. Instead, believe that you can change from introvert to extrovert. Our beliefs make up our reality - what we believe becomes so. Remember, you are in control. You can be a confident, self-assured and charming person - you just have to believe it! Sometimes, being an introvert can be a crutch. Being too quiet and shy stops you from doing the things you want. It stunts your emotional and social development. Don???t restrict yourself to your comfort zone; help yourself grow. Making the change from introvert to extrovert will be one of the best things you can do for yourself. Why would you want to change from introvert to extrovert? Obviously, it's tough being an introvert. You'll feel shy and awkward. You'll find it hard to approach strangers and introduce yourself. You'll feel awkward in social situations. Being an introvert sure can complicate your life. Your performance in school, your job and career, your relationship with friends and co-workers - these can all suffer. Transformation, though, is easier than it sounds. Here are four easy steps to change from introvert to extrovert. Step 1: Realize That You Can Change. Being an introvert is a learned behavior, a process, a habit. But it's not a life sentence. It's not genetic, but a result of faulty programming as you were growing up. To change from introvert to extrovert, the first thing you have to do is to acknowledge the fact that you are an introvert; then recognize that you can change to an extrovert with the right attitude and determination. Step 2: Find Out The Cause. Again, emphasis on the fact that no one is born shy. There's usually a pattern that leads to your introvert behavior. What triggers it? Is it a thing, a person, or situation? What makes you uncomfortable? Whatever makes you lose your confidence, it's important that you know it so you can beat it. Step 3: Prepare And Practice. On your own, simulate a situation that you find awkward, then think of how you can walk yourself through it. Think of different scenarios and then make strategies on how you can deal with them. Practicing helps prepare you and builds your self-esteem little by little. Even when you fake it at first, eventually you will make it. Step 4: Believe Anyone who believes he or she is an introvert will really become one. Thinking that way won't help you at all. Instead, believe that you can change from introvert to extrovert. Our beliefs make up our reality - what we believe becomes so. Remember, you are in control. You can be a confident, self-assured and charming person - you just have to believe it! Sometimes, being an introvert can be a crutch. Being too quiet and shy stops you from doing the things you want. It stunts your emotional and social development. Don't restrict yourself to your comfort zone; help yourself grow. Making the change from introvert to extrovert will be one of the best things you can do for yourself. Got Your Speech, Know How to Present, Ready to Go, Right? Wrong! by Susan Dunn, Professional Internet Marketing Coach in Business (submitted 2002-11-02) For most people, public speaking is a challenge, but even once you've mastered the techniques, and the part about just getting up there, you're work isn't done. The most common mistake I find in clients I coach about presenting is failing to grasp this concept: When you're giving a presentation, you're not talking about XYZ, you're communicating to a group of individuals. Arrive early before your presentation and visit with the individuals as they arrive. You'll find out all sorts of things you need to know that can help you stand out among presenters. Everyone knows their topic -- or should, and know how to give a presentation (or should), but it's knowing how to work the particular and unique group in front of you that gets you asked back, gets you business, and builds your reputation. The 15 minutes you spend mingling, make the difference! (And BTW, don't rely on what you were told about this group. It's rarely reliable, and it isn't specific to your needs. Find our for yourself.) 1. Find out why they came. Ask questions such as "What brings you here?" WHY questions are never good to ask. People don't know, and/or it raises defenses. Any other personal information you can gather will make your speech more effective, and also gives you hints as to which of your services and products (you do have the "table in the back" set up, don't you?) they'd be most likely to need and to buy. 2. Find out what they expect you to talk about. You'll be surprised! 3. Get first and last names to use later in your presentation, and occupations if you can. You'll be able to work this into allusions and metaphors. For instance, I often talk about optimism and I give examples about how to attribute negative events. With information, I can give examples particularly relating to their fields of work. 4. Ask questions about their organization or group. Later you can work this into your talk and it will help build relationship. 5. Find out who the officers are in the group. Mentioning their name later on will bring cohesiveness to your talk and involve your audience. 6. Find out where they heard or read about the presentation. You need this for marketing. 7. Step back and tune into your instincts to get the 'feel' of the group. Are they introspective, annoyed about a common issue, friendly with one another? Is it high energy or low energy? You can adjust your presentation accordingly - wake them up if they're asleep, soothe them if they're agitated. 8. Watch to see who the real leaders are. They're often not the official leaders. They are the "influencers" who will get you invited back or not. 9. Check out the introversion/extroversion scale. This will tell you how to manage interactive exercises. Introverts are less likely to want to participate, likely to prefer the partner they came with, less eager to respond to questions out loud, and dislike stating the obvious. Extroverts will participate more eagerly, but may be harder to manage and keep on-task. 10. Listen for clues as to who's good at what, and what fields they're in. You may need help with the projector. You may have to manage the person who has a Ph.D. in the field you're talking about. You may pinpoint the extrovert who'll be enthusiastic about answering a question or when you need a volunteer. 11. Get the local newspaper and check on what's going on in their location. Better yet, talk to your cab driver on your way from the airport. I once arrived to give a talk in Seattle right after a number of firefighters had lost their lives which had stunned the community. The cab driver told me all about it, and I was able to, (1) resonate with the audience, and (2) work many examples into my talk. Know your subject, know how to present, and most of all, know your particular audience. Involving Your Teen in Travel Plans When planning for your travels always consider having your teenager involve in the planning of the trip. The best place to discuss the trip is around the dinner table, and having a good planned family meeting helps get your teen talking about what to bring for the trip, and discussing other issues that may relate to the vacation. This is the time to have your teen involve on shaping the trip around their needs and comfort; this means they are responsible for speaking up and putting it on the table what they want and need. Teens Love Food of Their Choice Every teenager's eating habit is not the same, but whether your teenager is an introvert or extrovert, allowing teenagers to pick their choice of food for the trip makes a happy teen. Additionally, parents must understand their young adults, being half a kid and an adult need that time to be cooperative, responsible, and independent. In doing this, before and during your trip you will build a strong, positive relationship with your teenager; In fact, teenagers having money in their possession makes them happy to buy food and other stuff like adults. Teen vs. Money During the planning stages of the trip with your teens, you can include an allowance system in place for your teenager. This allowance system will be established for the use of allowing your teen to experience the empowerment of money, and help them make choices in the use of their money with the results of unwise or wise decisions that determines if they become broke or not on a family travels. A teen with money is a happy teen; at the same time, a teen making unwise choices with money makes an unhappy one and how they spend their allowance are often best left up to teens. Teen Loved to Be Entertained How introverts can win at networking events. by Mark Edward Lewis in Marketing (submitted 2008-05-23) I, Mark Edward Lewis, hate parties, don't you? Especially those thrown in Burbank, or the West Side, or worse yet: Hollywood. Why do we have to go then? If you're under 25 years old, the answer is quite a bit different than for a 32 year old film director like myself. For those of us not bopping around in search of club-fulfillment, the answer is simple: networking. It's the synergy that makes the film industry go 'round. That's fine...if you like chatting up people you don't know, laughing at stupid jokes by self-absorbed morons, and screaming at the top of your lungs because of Richter scale rated music. No thanks. I'm an introvert, and so are you. We hate nothing more than getting our charisma and good looks trumped by the clique club suit. But, the successful are reported to attend these debaucheries of biceps, alcohol, cleavage, and fathom deep fa???ades, and we must attend in kind. The problem: your provocative dress or exceptional posture won't get a second glance from the clump of chit-chatting partiers you want to meet. The answer? Simple, slick, effective. Get them a refill. Yes, a drink refill. Procedures: first, don't bother with parties that make you pay for drinks. There's nobody important at those parties anyway. Second, saddle up to some people you want to start a conversation with, and immediately ask the loudest member of the group if they would like a refill on their drink. Have no shame introvert, interrupt their conversation! Third, whisk yourself off to the bar before they ask you who you are. Mystery piques the imagination, and they'll be thinking about you every second you're gone. Don't rush. Take your time and saunter back. Let them acknowledge you. They'll interrupt themselves this time. Present your drink, and then introduce yourself and what you do. Of course, they'll know they've been had, but they won't care. They'll even give you the time you need for your turbo-charged charisma and wit to reach 2500 rpm. Get the business cards of everyone in the clump, but don't get drinks for everyone else. It will make the person with the new drink feel more important than those around them, and they'll remember you for that feeling. Finish the conversation early. Just get the business information and the verbal promise of a meeting and move to the next clump of people (preferably in the next room) and repeat. Why does this work? Because for the last 6000 years, every guru of every religion says the same thing: serving others will get you everything you want. They're right. It's the opposite of what Hollywood says, "when you're served, you get it all." Hogwash. It's all a deception to keep the introverts out of what is primarily an extrovert club. Don't be discouraged. Trump their nepotism with the service heart suit. It's an age old paradigm that works...even in Hollywood networking. There is nothing inherently bad about being introverted. In fact, introverts possess desirable qualities like being more introspective, intelligent, refined and self-aware than the extrovert. However, the problem is that if one desires to increase personal power in the important dimensions of social or collective identity, introverted "behaviors" can be a liability. Introverts may tell you they are happy with themselves; but intuitively, it seems doubtful that introverts get what they want in the social world. In empowerment theory, collective identity is one of six critical components of personal power.My experience suggests that introverts, while rich in some compartments of their lives, often have serious regrets and yearnings for more in the world of relationships as well as for a richer ability to assert themselves in a variety of different situations. What this translates into - for many of these individuals - is a sense of powerlessness,, at least in the realm of social identity. But here is some positive news: you can actually learn to act extroverted, thereby enhancing your participation in a more expanded social world, while at the same time, retaining the god-given aspects of introversion that you likely can't change anyway. This seems to be the best of both worlds. Just so we're on the same page, let's look at whom we are typically describing when we use the label "introvert". Maybe most striking is that this person needs hours alone every day and generally loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas. They can give an informative presentation to a big audience, but seem awkward in groups and are clueless with small talk. They often must be dragged to parties and then need the rest of the day to recuperate. They will sometimes respond in inappropriate ways to those who try to engage them casually. Introverts are not necessarily shy; shy people may exhibit a true social phobia and are quite anxious in interpersonal and group settings. Not so with introverts; they may actually like people but find them tiring in intense or extended doses. Extroverts love the company of others, not so much out of love of them but as a mirror for their own thoughts and ideas, which seem somehow empty when they are alone. They often seem bored by themselves and may even be somewhat depressed by the experience. However an extrovert won't typically endure being alone very long; they tend to seek out more human contact rather quickly. In contrast, after an hour or two of being socially "on," introverts need to turn off and recharge. For introverts, to be alone with their thoughts is a necessary restorative, like sleeping and eating. Why is this important to us? If introversion is our natural way, why upset the applecart? There are several reasons; first, with their tendency toward talk and attention, extroverts dominate social life, so they tend to set expectations of desirable behavior. In our extrovertist society, being outgoing is considered normal and positive, a standard of happiness, confidence and leadership. Extroverts are seen as bighearted, vibrant, warm, empathic and. "people persons", all widely considered compliments. Introverts are described with words like "guarded," "loner," "reserved," "taciturn," "self-contained," "private", even "arrogant"-- words less than complimentary. But these are misperceptions as well of course, though your public persona suffers from it. The lack of small talk by introverts can often be mistaken for disdain, when in fact it's simply avoidance. These features sometimes make introverts social pariahs and can impede their acquisition of personal power. It is desirable to be aware of these common misperceptions and do what we can to remedy them. So, you may ask, is it inauthentic or phony to want to act more introverted? Maybe, but I prefer look at it differently. Learning these behaviors is just another set of skills we may need to acquire in an effort to become empowered. It is actually a rather value-neutral choice, like say, learning a new computer application. Don't use the "phoniness" argument as an excuse not to move out of your comfort zone and mix it up socially. The terms "introvert" and "extrovert" hail from the world of psychobabble and the formulations of personality developed by Carl Jung. They have found their way into the linguistic mainstream as monikers used to typify and label individuals. I'm sure you've heard them around, and if you fit these classic types, have had the labels directed at you on occasion. "Extrovert" is valued, "introvert" tends not to be. Not to despair, this doesn't mean introverts can't reap the fruits of power that extroverts seem to have cornered the market on. Much of what extroverts do is mindless babble as they explore the world through social intercourse and discourse. Introverts explore their world through self-reflection and spending time exploring their inner world. However, what extroverts also do is make contacts and forge relationships that help them meet their goals as well, although this isn't always their objective. Sometimes they talk just to hear their own head rattle. But their style tends to put them at the cutting edge of change, power and prosperity and these are the elements of interest to those of us feeling some lack in these areas. However, even if you are primarily introverted, you can focus your social agenda on those aspects of "extroversion" that you find useful, meaningful and empowering. In fact, failure to do this may mean missing out on the benefits of the social identity necessary to participate fully in the world as an empowered individual. Unfortunately, introverts seem to shy away from just this sort of encounter, for a variety of reasons. One, it doesn't seem compelling and important and doesn't hold their interest for long; secondly, they feel devoid of the skills to do this; and three, they may think "what's the point"? These are legitimate concerns; however, they will likely be addressed if one commits to undergo the transformation into an "introverted extrovert". The following guidelines may help you move a bit closer to a sense of social identity founded on an "extrovert" style: 1) Introverted people may find they have difficulty retrieving words under pressure so have some opening lines ready for any social encounter. The old "at a loss for words" seems to be one of the most crippling social aspects for introverted types, hence, you should have a ready script for most social situations. None of this "nice weather" crap either. Something that draws the other out and can draw you in is much preferable; try, "what are you hoping to learn at this conference", or "how will this help you in your professional life"? If at a social gathering, you can use any number of engaging intros: "I haven't seen you around before, are you from out of town?', "tell me how you met our host". You get the idea, make up your own as you go and try them on. You'll be amazed how little it takes to engage someone in a conversation that can be both interesting and enjoyable. Once you feel engaged, turn the conversation toward those topics and subjects of interest to you. This is how social intercourse begins. A key aspect of collective identity is finding common ground within groups and associations that will then assume increasing importance and value in your life. 2) Work on your social engagement skills: handshakes, eye contact, posture and expressions. This may sound trite, but these are the skills that define who we are and are usually critical in impression formation on the part of those we meet. These elements may seem to come naturally to the extrovert but introverts have to develop and polish them somewhat since their natural tendency is to shun the "close encounter". You can benefit greatly by practicing these skills with someone you trust or a coach or trainer that specializes in helping people refine the social amenities. 3) While it's fine to go to a social event for no reason, introverts typically need some motivation for this type of thing - so pick events that have meaning or a "payoff" for you. If you want to become a better writer, go to a writer's group, if you are having a painful breakup; find some groups of singles with some shared interests. I'm not suggesting going to the bar scene or mindless activity just to hang out. There wouldn't be much of value or enjoyment there for the introvert. Put yourself in a collective or group experience that you will feel benefited, regardless of the social dynamics at play. These efforts will be difficult at first so you may want to enlist the help of your trusted friend or coach again to provide some companionship, support and accountability as you get started. 4) Give yourself plenty of time to prepare for a social event and lots of time to "recover" afterwards. It would be too far our of your comfort zone, and entirely unnecessary, to be "on" all the time. Small doses of social experiences are plenty for the introvert and you will generally accomplish in a short time what extroverts take much longer to do since they actually thrive on the contact. To get yourself "in the mood" beforehand, it can helpful to listen to or watch comedy videos and get in a more humorous relaxed space before you go out. Remember, the goal here is to find value and overall life satisfaction from your new social identity, so approach it with a receptive attitude and it will work for you much better. While you'll probably never become an extrovert, you can participate more broadly on the social front, make contacts that allow you to pursue new opportunities and even derive satisfaction and pleasure from your expanded social roles. Unfortunately, you will still need to be dragged to some of these social outings to get started. Hopefully, in time you'll learn to drag yourself - you'll be better for it and may actually find you enjoy your life more. How To Avoid Conflict In a Relationship by Zarelsie Van Der Merwe in Relationships (submitted 2011-05-30) Are you and your partner constantly fighting? Is your relationship unpleasant because of your constant disagreements and distrust? Any relationship goes through some level of turmoil sometimes, but constant conflict in a relationship is a sign that something is seriously wrong. Usually, this means that the couple will split and the relationship will have to end, but it does not have to be this way if partners in a relationship dig a little deeper and address the root cause of the relationship conflict. Here are some steps you can take to search for the cause and solve the conflict: 1. Are your personalities clashing? If they are, do not despair. Believe it or not, subconsciously people are usually attracted to a person with opposite personality traits because they see in the other person the traits which are lacking in themselves. Although this may initially cause interpersonal conflict which translates into relationship problems, it is not a lost cause. If your partner is the collected and introverted type, you might subconsciously be attracted to his/her calmness of character if you are an extroverted, party animal. This might also be the cause of the friction in your relationship. People with different personalities like different things and you may not always agree. A solution may be to find some common ground and still give your partner enough space to live according to his/her personality type and grow as an individual. 2. Do your value blueprints differ? Of course it does! Value blueprints refer to the value system we are brought up in as children and which is cemented into our psyche as a child and becomes the values we live by as adults. Therefore all of our value blueprints are different if we were brought up in a different family and society. How do you handle alcohol, money, how important is a good education, where do you perceive your status in society? Those are all aspects of our value blueprint. People are brought up in different value systems and with the world now becoming a global village, chances are good that your value blueprint will differ from your partner's. You then need to sit down and discuss and create a new value system for your relationship and your life together. It will mean that both partners will have to give and take a little, but where there is true love, it will overcome differences. 3. How do you handle stress? When people are stressed, it brings out a set of behaviour which involves taking things it out on other people for no reason. And we cannot help it, to vent our feelings of anger and frustration caused by stress is a natural reaction. As partners in a relationship you will have to understand that this is an inevitable part of a modern relationship. Your partner will vent his/her anger, stress and frustrations easier to you than to the person that he/she is angry or frustrated with, for instance his/her boss. You are the closest to your partner and he/she is going to take it out on you. As partners you will firstly have to acknowledge the fact that this behaviour exists, how to recognise it and then make a plan to deal with it. Get help if you need to or find a common way of venting your stress, like exercising, instead of taking it all out on your partner. Modern relationships are facing a great deal of stress and demands not known in earlier years. Relationship conflict is a symptom that something is wrong in a relationship. By investigating the above three aspects of relationships, it can be possible to identify the root cause of the relationship conflict and find a solution, instead of ending the relationship. How To Avoid Hiring The Wrong Grass Cutting Business Employee by Daniel Pepper in Business (submitted 2007-12-09) Your grass cutting business employees will make or break you. Hiring the wrong employee is setting yourself up for a major tailspin you may not come out of. The hiring process is a "very" big deal. Think about it for a second. You'll be increasing the size of your lawn care business and delegating important responsibilities. Someone else will be representing you to your customers and the world. Whatever level of importance you have put the hiring process at, increase it a notch. Adding an employee is going to change the dynamics of your business in small and large ways as well as those that are unforeseen. So begin the hiring process by giving extra special attention to the type of person you would like to work with. Do you want to work with and an introvert or an extrovert? Do you want to work with a potential leader or someone who will follow? These are all question you want to ask yourself. Ultimately, you'll want a person who will follow your lawn care business vision. Someone who will work with you and not against you. Hiring an employee is a big, big deal and a learned skill. Here are some other questions you need to answer when considering hiring a helping hand: 1. Where Do They Fit? What will be this new person's job? The trick is to give them enough responsibility but not too much. Make sure to balance out what they do and what you do. List out what you want them to do for you. 2. What Is Their Pay Rate? What will you pay this new employee and how many hours will they work? Are there any benefits you will be providing for them? Drop by http://www.salary.com to see what the going rate is. In the end you will have a job description that you hope will attract the attention of the "right" employee. 3. Where Will You Find Them? There are numerous means of letting people know your lawn care business is hiring. The most popular are classified newspaper ads. You can also try employment agencies, online job postings (Monster.com), job fairs, word-of-mouth, etc. With the right job description in place, you will soon find yourself getting inquiries regarding the postion. Look over the resumes. Call the ones that stand out. 4. What Will The Interview Consist Of? A lot of grass cutting business owners are scared of the interview process. Don't be. By this point you should clearly know who you are looking for and where they will fit. Have a list of questions (straight forward and unexpected) ready in advance. Take as much time as you need to get a feel for each person. After all, they'll be representing you and depending on the size of your lawn business, may be working alongside you. 5. Have You Checked Out Their Past? When you find the interviewees that stand out, do your due diligence. Follow their references. When the "right" one appears on top, make an offer in writing to keep things clear and on the table. Hiring a lawn care business employee is truly exciting. Even better is when you see your business go to the next level with this individual as part of your team. Here's to your success. How to be a friend of yourself by needgucci in Investment / 401k (submitted 2010-11-15) Friendship with oneself is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world.- Eleanor Roosevelt coach handbags We often focus on building relationships with others that we forget the essential first step: being friends of ourselves. That is the crucial first step if we are to have good relationships with others. How can we have good relationships with others if we don't even have good relationship with ourselves? The problem might be worse than we expect. Maybe we don't like ourselves without realizing it. Here is a simple checklist; is there anything you don't like about yourself from these list? Your past Maybe you have made mistakes in the past which you feel bad about. You might be disappointed with yourself on why you could make such mistakes. Even if that happened in distant past, your subconscious mind still has a reason not to like yourself. Your background You might wish that you were born in different family, or that you have different background. Maybe you could not accept the fact that you are not as lucky as others, who seem to get whatever they want effortlessly because of their background. Your personality traits You might have some personality traits that you don't like. For example, you may be an introvert and you don't like it; you wish you are an extrovert. Your achievements relative to others Others might have better achievements than you, and no matter how hard you tried, it might seem impossible for you to match them. You might then think that it's because you are not smart enough or don't have enough talents. Is there anything that resonate with you? All these give reasons to you not to like yourself. That in turn makes it difficult for you to be a good friend to yourself. Fortunately, there are always things you can do to fix the situation. Here are some tips: 1. Forgive yourself You may have made those mistakes in the past, but is there anything you can do about them? I don't think so, except learning from them. It's true that you are not perfect, but neither is everybody else. It's normal to make mistakes, so do yourself a favor by giving yourself forgiveness. 2. Accept things you can't change There are some things you cannot change, such as your background and your past. So learn to accept them. You will feel much relieved if you treat things you can't change the way they deserve: just accept them, smile, and move on. 3. Focus on your strengths Instead of focusing on your weaknesses, focus on your strengths. You always have some strengths which give you a unique combination nobody else have. Recognize your strengths and build your life around them. Health Top Tips Nutrition Lifestyle 4. Write your success stories One reason we may not like ourselves is we are too focused on what we don't have that we forget about what we have. So make a list of your achievements; write your success stories. They do not have to be big things; there are a lot of small but important achievements in our life. For example, if you have some good friends, that's already an achievement. If you have a good family, that is also an achievement. 5. Stop comparing yourself with others You are unique. You can never be like other people, and neither can other people be like you. The way you measure your success is not determined by other people and what they achieve. Instead, it is determined by your own life purpose. You have everything you need to achieve your life purpose, so it's useless to compare yourself with others. 6. Always be true to yourself You don't like other people lying to you, right? Similarly, you won't like yourself if you know that you lie to yourself. Whether you realize it or not, that gives your mind a reason not to like yourself. That's why it's important to always be true to yourself. In whatever you do, be honest and follow your conscience. Remember this quote by Abraham Lincoln: coach purses I desire so to conduct the affairs of this administration that if at the end... I have lost every other friend on earth, I shall at least have one friend left, and that friend shall be down inside of me. How To Become A Community Leader by Nichasinshanle in Real Estate (submitted 2011-03-28) Becoming a community leader is one of the most fulfilling roles you may ever undertake. Are you a citizen who wants to bring about change to your community? Do you look around your town and see things that need improvement? Perhaps you believe: A crime-watch organization would benefit your area? You can contribute to your school system???s quality? A food pantry should be set up in your community? A stop sign needs to be placed at a busy intersection? Whatever your concerns, you can develop the leadership skills that will bring about real change in your community. Get involved in your neighborhood Though you may not think of yourself as a natural-born leader, it???s possible to develop strong and credible leadership skills. Both extroverted and introverted people can be excellent leaders???it???s all about the passion. ???Even people who don???t think of themselves as leaders can get involved,??? says Chevy Chase, Maryland, resident Barry Hager, president of Hager Associates, a Washington, D.C.-based legal and consulting firm. Hager was appointed by the town???s mayor to head a committee to address zoning issues. ???Even if you weren???t a leader in high school, you can do what needs to be done,??? adds Hager, who, along with others in his town, successfully limited some of the residential over-building in his community. Listen to others If you wish to be a vital leader in your community, it???s important to listen closely to what others have to say. Value others??? opinions. Other people will become more involved if they know their opinions are important. ???You really have to be willing to spend the time listening to other people because people don???t want to hear a speech, they want to have a conversation,??? Hager says. ???You have to be willing to listen to your neighbors, talk through issues, develop a consensus, and take the time to do this.??? Improve your public speaking skills Another part of being a good community leader is the ability to speak in front of people, whether it???s just a few individuals, or a crowd of people. That???s a skill that not all people have, but one that can be developed over time. ???Good public speakers are confident, prepared, and knowledgeable, and they have subject matter expertise,??? says Daniel Rex, executive director of Toastmasters International. ???In addition, they need to have thought in advance about what they want to say, and how they are going to support what they are going to say,??? he says. ???Are they going to use a microphone, walk around the room or use a whiteboard???? Practice makes perfect No matter how you address your audience, there???s no doubt that the more you practice getting up in front of a group to deliver your message, the more proficient you will become as a public speaker. ???Confidence comes from practice, and getting in front of an audience as often as you can,??? Rex says. The rewards are great Serving as a community leader certainly has its rewards, Hager says. ???You do get to bring about change, and make new and stronger friendships,??? he says. How to Become An Extrovert by John Bino in Self Help / Motivational (submitted 2010-08-03) I was staring down at a post-it note with a phone number of a potential client on it. My mind was racing about how to start the conversation so that I can get an appointment with him. My palms were sweaty and my breath short. I was thinking to myself, "John, this is the 3rd freakin' day that you have been staring down that note and have not mustered the courage to pick up the phone and talk! Enough is Enough! Do it now! Do it now!" I picked up the phone and dialed the number and to my pleasant surprise the gentleman at the other end turned out to be, well, a 'gentleman'. I got the appointment and also felt so much lighter and bolder. Then I asked myself as to what stalled me for 3 full days to get such a small job done? The answer that came up is an ingredient of success that probably is as important as salt to food. And that is 'Being Comfortable with People'. And most people are not. Whatever area of expertise you may be in, whatever industry you may be serving, you may have noticed that to climb up the ladder of success it is imperative that you learn how to be comfortable being around other people. That further leads to communication and later on leads to sales. I don't mean selling of a product or a service, but selling of your thoughts, emotions and ideas. That's what true selling is about. Introverts, in almost all cases, don't make it to the top simply because he/she can't gather other people around them to support a common cause. Don't get me wrong, they can be a genius and achieve great things on their own. However, in order to leverage other people's time and energy one needs to be an extrovert. So why do most people keep to themselves? What are they uncomfortable expressing their views? The answer lies within the person. This is because they feel a lack of self-worth. And one feels a lack of self-worth when they feel that they don't have anything valuable to contribute or share in that particular situation. And instead of working on correcting the problem, they sulk and take a back seat. And an introvert is born! An introvert can become an extrovert. It's simple and easy. Nobody can tell me that it doesn't happen because I am a living proof. I used to hide from anything that moves. But today I sit and address audiences of hundreds. How did I do it? This is how. There are only two ways to an introvert can convert to being an extrovert. 1. Have more knowledge about the subject being discussed 2. Be in a situation about which you have more knowledge about Yeah, it's that simple! Before we explore each a little further, I would like to highlight that being an extrovert doesn't mean that you have to be bursting with active enthusiasm and energy. Henry Ford was one such example. When Napoleon Hill, Author or Think and Grow Rich, went to interview Henry Ford, he appeared so cold and uninterested that Napoleon Hill thought to himself, "how can this guy Ford amount to anything? His handshake is weak, his voice is low, he doesn't smile and he is working around in dirty overalls. How can this guy ever accomplish anything of importance?" Now how wrong could that be, huh? So, coming back to the first way on how to be an extrovert - Have more knowledge about the subject being discussed. One can achieve this is by learning more either through books or signing up for some courses. For example: When I started selling timeshare, I had no clue about what's the meaning of timeshare. So, as to be expected, I was not comfortable picking up the phone and talking to people. What would I talk about? Correct? That's when I started learning more about travel and the features and benefits of timeshare. Once I gained this knowledge, I was much more comfortable sharing this information with others. Second way - Be in a situation about which you have more knowledge about. This is where the vast majority fall short. They are interested in basketball but hang around people who are interested in baseball. They are interested in fashion but hang with computer nerds. Isn't the mismatch obvious? In my case, I was interested in 'Financial Education' and I was selling timeshare! Where is the link?! You get me around people who are interested in improving their personal finances, and then you will have a hard time keeping my mouth shut. As far as I am concerned, these above two are the only ways an Introvert can be converted to an Extrovert. Try them out and see the difference for yourself. God Bless. How to Become an Extrovert? Be Gregarious by Vik Frisky in Self Help / Motivational (submitted 2010-10-08) Are you having trouble speaking out in front of your boss? Are you too shy to ask the person you like out on a date? Do you always sit in a quiet corner of a room when a party is at full swing? Do you wish you change all this? Do you wish to become more of an extrovert? Well, if you read the following article you might just learn how to remove the barrier that you have created around you and you will become naturally more talkative and assertive. Just because someone is out spoken or likes being the center of attention doesn't necessary mean they are an extrovert. The same goes true for introverts, people who are generally quiet doesn't mean they are hermits or recluses. Some people have a very wrong idea about introverts. They seem to forget that there are two types of personalities, extroverts and introverts. Nobody can judge which one is better. However, in today's world where communicating and interacting with people is a must, many people are trying to become more and more extrovert in nature. Now the root of the problem does not lie in the present. It is actually what you are. Being an introvert is not something you can help. It is a core element of your personality, one which you cannot change. However, what you can change is your outer personality. You can act more like an extrovert. You can try being more enthusiastic and gregarious, try learning how to be more assertive and also try learning on how to improve your communication skills. The first thing to do when trying to become an extrovert is to do something you would normally never do. Now I don't mean that you commit a crime or something but the main thing what I am trying to say is that you break out of your comfort zone. You find yourself much more comfortable being an introvert and that is why your personality has molded that way. Next, you can start talking to more people. I know it sounds a bit weird talking to new people just to modify your personality but you need to expand your social circle. Do not think about what the other person might be thinking about you. You want this change in yourself and you should be the judge of what you are doing. Do not let the fear of what people might think turn you down from accomplish your mission. Another thing that you can do is if you find talking to someone outright uncomfortable, is observing how others interact and learn from them. That way when you start your own socializing you will know the dos and don'ts! Plus, you need to find people with your same interest or something similar with you. That way it would be much easier for you. Also, try to remember the names of the people you get to know. It would not look attractive if you forget who you are talking to! How to Choose the Most Ideal Women's Watches by Brianwishbest in Shopping / Fashion Style (submitted 2010-12-20) Do you want to purchase a women's watch for your friend? Do you want your friend to remind of you with the each second passing by? That sounds a good idea for the coming Christmas. Your friend will feel appreciated and think it is really an unforgettable Christmas. Maybe you do not know which kind is the best. Many ladies really like watches, but selecting suitable watches seems to be not easy. Here are some tips for you to make decisions. You will not feel puzzled after seeing these tips. First, try to know what is your personality and then you may have a general idea of which kind of female's watch to buy. Are you an extrovert girl or an introvert girl? Which style do you like most? Second, try to know your own taste and what kind of clothes do you usually wear. Will the watch you are going to buy suit your clothes? These will give you some information. Third, try to think about what you do. Are you a student, an office lady or a housewife? Will the watch that you are going to buy match your position? Notice what you have already had will assist you to find an ideal watch which you have dreamed about for a long time. Do not buy a sport watch if you are an office lady. The watch is an individual belonging that represents the taste and the style of a person. It will be easy for you if you have already known about yourself well. However, just because there are many fake women's watches in the market or online stores, so you should look it over thoroughly before making up a decision to buy the watch or check the reviews about the watch as well as the features and specifications when you are shopping online. At last, we bet you can find the ideal women's watches for the women in you life as long as you do research correctly. How To Conquer The 3 Most Common Networking Concerns -Pushy, Perfection, Possibly NO by Barb Girson in Business / Networking (submitted 2010-05-15) The weather is beautiful. It's time to get out, 'network' and meet new people. Yet three common networking concerns surface and might hold us back. The most common networking concerns that I hear are what I call the sales plagues of the P: 1. Fear of Being PUSHY 2. Plagued by Perfection 3. The Pessimism of Possibly Hearing NO Here are some ways to reframe and conquer these these fears: Fear of being PUSHY - This concern is real because some people assign direct sellers the reputation of being PUSHY and some direct sellers are PUSHY. The issue is sometimes due to faulty perception or preconceived notions and other times is due to ineffective actions. This reaction is warranted when people pitch their business too soon, and act like their business opportunity, product or service is the cure all for everyone. Even though it is important to be enthusiastic and enthusiasm is an attractive quality, it can be misconstrued. These actions may be a deterrent, unless the other person is receptive to listen and ready to buy. Other guaranteed repellents to avoid while pursuing prospects include: pity, desperation, and (worth repeating)...diving into the pursuit of business before discovering the motivational need or desire for a product or service. To conquer the fears of PUSHY calibrate your volume control. Are you an introvert or extravert? As an introvert, you may have the desire to speak to the bank teller or the person at a luncheon; however by the time you work up the courage to assert yourself, and figure out what to say...the opportunity is gone. To increase your effectiveness, turn up the volume and be ready to converse. Shift your focus toward building new relationships instead of focusing on finding immediate new business. With practice and encouragement, this action will grow to be routine and sincere. As an extrovert, you may drive people away with your strong conviction, enthusiasm and zeal. In order to increase your effectiveness, turn down the volume to connect with others. With patience and objectivity, the prospects will blossom accordingly. I spoke at an organization meeting recently about the benefit of being an entrepreneur. Bob walked in and at the end of meeting out of the blue; he said something similar to this: "Hey everyone I have a fantastic new opportunity that my millionaire friend and I are bringing to this town. She has made gazillions from this industry and now is your chance to jump on board... If you are interested you can just listen to this CD and come to the meeting. The key word here is "WELL-NESS". A heavy cloud dropped over the room as he plowed forward and made his announcement. Eyes rolled, faces scrunched and immediately after the small group of people looked down so as not to make eye contact. The response reflected the aftermath of PUSHY. To increase effectiveness, focus on noticing the impact you are having on others. Find ways to meet their needs and build rapport before blurting out business bids. Look for signals of interest, curiosity and permission to proceed. Plagued by Perfection - Release yourself from the idea that your delivery needs to be perfect or that each encounter needs to be a hit. By focusing on practice and progress, you will develop a personal style. If all you walk away with is practice, you still benefit in the end. Stay in a learning mode, allow yourself to make mistakes and improve as you figure out how to effectively manage your volume control. The Pessimism of Possibly Hearing NO - Be mindful of the fact that receiving a 'no' is not a personal rejection or personal attack. When new contacts sense that you have let go of the outcome, conversation flows easier and the context is more comfortable. When they sense that a no will be difficult for you to hear or accept, the conversation tends to get awkward or indirect. You never really know where you stand. A 'no' provides additional opportunities for reflection, and sometimes correction. No may mean 'not now' versus 'never'. When you do get a no, ask if it is OK to check back at a later date. When you reconnect your contact may be willing to reconsider. Most professional relationships form after six communications. Fostering the connections during future meetings will often help build the relationship, generate referrals and give you better results. When you find your optimal volume control and networking style, your potential to bring in new business is limitless. Each interaction bears a different set of circumstances, with a different outcome. With an understanding for the importance of networking, your sales will increase, and your businesses will simply grow. Conquer the 3 most common networking concerns and turn these 3 "P" sales plagues into unlimited possibility. ??? 2010 All Rights Reserved. Barb Girson Original Work If you are attempting to date a loner and are a social butterfly yourself, the road ahead can be a bumpy one. According to the article "Field Guide to the Loner: The Real Insiders" found on the Psychology Today website, "While outgoing people savor the nuances of social interaction, loners tend to focus more on their own ideas-and on stimuli that don't register in the minds of others. Social engagement drains them, while quiet time gives them an energy boost." A relationship between an extrovert and an introvert requires a lot of compromise and patience . Tip 1 Don't look on his socializing choices as a disease that needs to be fixed. According to Jonathan Cheek, a psychologist at Wellesley College, "Contrary to popular belief, not all loners have a pathological fear of social contact. ... Some people simply have a low need for affiliation." Tip 2 Plan to spend the majority of date nights at home. The bonus to this is that you will have plenty of quality couple time with your partner, along with deep emotional interaction. Tip 3 Offer to do things with him that will not shove him into socializing at first in the relationship if you need to, like volunteering at your favorite charity. According to the article "The Loner: At Home in the World" found on Psychology Today "Many loners report that worrying about what others think of them is among their biggest social bugaboos. Coming to someone's aid is the best tonic." I've compiled the extroversion and introversion traits, and what you can do with these different types of personality types in your life. Let's start with the extroverts.. An extrovert is someone who: - Tends to make friends easily, and needs those friends as much as the need to make more friends. - Seeks a career which offers more personal interaction, than behind-the-desk work. - Loves to travel a lot, and more frequently as possible. - Prefers to work late into the night, party harder, and most probably rise late in the mornings. So what can you do with an extrovert? - Select this person for aggressive projects where top-notch people skills (or soft skills) are required. - Deal with trouble extroverts by placing them into appropriate activities to suit their temperaments. - Hire outgoing extroverts for jobs where frequent traveling is a must. - Adjust your timetable to enjoy a better relationship with your extrovert partner, or spouse. Now onto the introverts.. An introvert is someone who: - Prefers to be alone or in small groups. - Doesn't like traveling, or particularly comfortable in group situations. - Prefers early mornings, rather than staying up late at night. - Tends to be more cautious, and restrained in most aspects of life. And here's what you can do with an introvert: - An introvert person tends to be more focused, so assign projects which demand more concentration and persistence, rather than aggression. - Since group situations can be faltering, adjust your lifestyle to include more one-to-one quality time with your introvert partner, or spouse. - Early risers can meet deadlines more easily, so keep in mind to include at least one introvert person on high-profile tasks. - Seek assistance in financial management, or even marketing strategies, to achieve better results. These were some of my suggestions on how to use the extroversion or introversion nature of anybody you know at work, or outside work. Do remember, there are still many people out there who exhibit both extrovert and introvert nature in different settings, depending on the levels of confidence they might feel in these different scenarios. For instance, a person who's outgoing nature makes her the limelight of any party, can be actually an introvert at work if she's not really satisfied with (or even qualified for) her job. Love indeed is a mystery. It's the awesome chemistry that bonds two people together and keeps them together for a lifetime despite all odds. I say it keeps them together because several examples abound of couples who have had a very fulfilling lifelong love life. You can be sure that they had their fair share of love travails, but they made it. They have a scientific, tangible proof that love is real and it works! For those who have had the unfortunate experience of a broken relationship or a divorce, there are really two possibilities: The first is that they didn't actually find their soul mate. It was a surface thing that was mistaken for true love. When the storms of life pounded on their love - as it does for every pair of lovebirds, it broke because it wasn't an irreversible bond. The second is much more unfortunate. Here, the soul mates actually found each other, but because divorce is such an easy option and there is so much flak flying around that once it isn't working then you're not meant or each other and you should quit, they don't spend enough time to exhaust all reconciliatory options and therefore shortchange themselves by taking the supposedly easy way out. Either situation could have been avoided if you take the following absolutely foolproof steps when the love vibes start knocking on your heart: First, get to know your basic temperamental leanings. At least you should be able to tell if you are a core introvert or an extrovert. If you would rather watch a movie or read some literature than go out with friends, then you are a core introvert. How To Find The Best Franchise Opportunity Right For You by Candice Clem in Business / Franchising (submitted 2009-02-11) Online cookbooks are one of my favorite ancillary benefits of today???s current technology. I???ve never been great in the kitchen, but once I found that I could find step-by-step instructions for making all kinds of food, I no longer had to worry about my own pitiful culinary sense, because someone had already done the hard work for me, and all I had to do was follow their lead. If everything in life were like that, this would be such an easier place to live, unfortunately, not everything in life is so easy. And though I???m sorry to say it, one of the most dauntingly non-recipe things in life is career: no one can tell you exactly what career is right for you and what steps you???ll have to go through to get there. And franchise opportunities aren???t any different; there are so many variables to every individual person that no one is capable of detailing the best experience for everyone beforehand. What I can offer, however, are some tips for helping you figure it out for yourself. One of the most important things to take into consideration when piecing together your personal franchise plan is who you are. And because a full analysis of that will take us each a lifetime, let???s start broad. Aside from gender, one of the broadest personality classifications is the difference between introvert and extrovert, the first being people who are fueled by being with others, and the second being those of us who are energized by being alone. What you naturally are will help determine exactly what kind of business opportunity you should be looking for. For example, knowing where you get your energy will help determine whether a home-based business or a franchise with a public storefront and a host of other employees will be a better environment for you. The difference, in this way, between a HomeVestors work-at-home operation and a Maui Wowi Hawaiian Coffees & Smoothies shop is huge. At the one, you will spend hours upon hours by yourself, in your home, making phone calls, studying housing market trends, shopping for real-estate, posting advertisements, and potentially not seeing another human being for days on end, which, for some of us, sounds like the ultimate vacation. At the other business, every day will be out of the house, dealing with a handful of employees in close proximity and line after line of guests looking for a tasty treat and personal service. If you???re like most people, one of these prospects will be very appealing and the other may sound like a nightmare. Let???s try another angle: the difference between hands-on work with the public and the administration of people who do that frontline work. A franchisee with 1-800-905-GEEK has a completely different business role than an owner of a One Hour Parties small business, mainly because the 1-800-905-GEEK owner is primarily responsible for maintaining operations and receiving calls from clients, whom his employees then go out to help. In contrast, the One Hour Parties owner is actually the person at the client???s office, arranging the event and schmoozing with partygoers. Both are serving the public and corporate world, but their positions in doing so are utterly different, requiring two separate kinds of people for optimum success. There???s one more way to look at this to help pick out whether you???re suited for a more introvert- or extrovert-ready business opportunity. Are you a bigger fan of people or projects? A Snap-On Tools franchisee is responsible for one thing: selling tools, which requires a high degree of interpersonal contact and an outgoing spirit, generally traits of an extrovert. Not that introverts are naturally mean or unlikable, quite the contrary, but after hours and days of sales, some get worn down. In contrast to this business model, whose success is built on personal interaction, the model of a franchise like Sure Step involves communication with the client, but the majority of the actual work revolves around physical labor. Some franchisees would much rather work on getting a task done than working directly with clients all day. What about you? In the end, most of us are neither wholly introvert nor wholly extrovert, and the franchise business right you, whether work-from-home, project-based, or otherwise, is going to reflect a very specific combination of human relations and independence natural to your personality. Sit and spend some time thinking all these options through and then investigate in detail the franchises that sound best for you. How to Find the Entrepreneurial Lifestyle That Will Fulfill Your Dreams by Joshua Black in Business / Entrepreneurship (submitted 2009-10-13) People that have entrepreneurial dreams sometimes get lost along the way. As an entrepreneur you need to get ready to push yourself beyond your limits and to lift yourself up when you are down. Read on to find out how you can make it through to the other end of the life of an entrepreneur with a bag of success in your hand. Read on to find out how. First, you need to find an entrepreneurial venture that fits your lifestyle. Are you an extrovert or an introvert? Do you like travel? Do you like to be hands on or hands off. Just because an entrepreneurial venture sounds like it's an amazing opportunity or it might impress your friends, you need to make sure that it will fit into your lifestyle. You will have to answer all of those personal questions first. Next, you need to decide if you have the guts to push yourself forward when the times get a little rough... and they will. If you are the type of person that needs a lot of people to keep cheering you along and has a hard time pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, then entrepreneurship may not be the ticket for you. You need to be your own coach. You need to be your own adviser sometimes, and you definitely need to be your own believer. You must go into your goal knowing that you will finish it. If you, the entrepreneur, has any doubts about your goal, then you probably won't make it. You have to see the goal and be willing to do anything in your power to get there. If you can have that attitude and you can see your vision, knowing that you won't fail, then you may have what it takes to be an entrepreneur. Remember that your entrepreneurial vision will be a huge part of your life. Your project must fit in with your lifestyle and your dreams. How To Get A Girlfriend - An Easy 3-Step Plan by James Rigby in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2011-03-10) How to get a girlfriend must be one of the most sought-after yet lacking skills among young men. It's time an easy step-by-step plan was put together. The key points of such a plan are very simple - figure out what kind of person you are establish what kind of girl would be most attracted to you and then give her the best reason in the world to like you. Let's take these three points one at a time. 1. What kind of person are you? Are you extrovert, always with your friends, the life and soul of the party? Or are you introvert, happiest when you're alone or with just one or two friends in quiet surroundings? Or maybe you're somewhere in between, like most people. Gauge whereabouts you are on the scale. Do you have any special qualities? Everyone has at least one or two. Are you kind? Do you have a sharp wit or great sense of humour? Are you good with people? Are you devoted to a particular sport or hobby? Assess your strong points and your weak points, good things about you and not so good things. All the things in life you love, and all the things you hate. Take your time over this because it's golden. Even write it all down if it helps. It really does work. When you've written all you can, put the paper away and retrieve it the next day or the day after. You'll be surprised at how many changes you make to it after your sub-conscious has had time to ponder it all. The more you do this the better the picture you'll have of yourself - and the truer. So let's move on to the next stage. 2. What kind of girl would be most attracted to a person like you? You shouldn't go looking for a girl that's a carbon copy of you, nor the complete opposite. That's not how to get a girlfriend. Look at all the characteristics that you've written down and establish in your mind in relation to each one what kind of qualities should be present in your ideal girlfriend. If you're totally outgoing and liable to do some wacky things sometimes, you may prefer a girlfriend who can "rein you in" now and then. If you're rather quiet and introverted you need a girlfriend who can bring you out and make you blossom. You see? It doesn't really matter if she's blonde or brunette, petite or well rounded. What matters most is how the two of you can blend together to form a mutually satisfying and workable partnership. That's how to get girlfriends. 3. How do you give her a solid reason to like you? You have to make her feel good about herself. And you do this not by trying to impress her with how wonderful you are, but by how wonderful she is. By focusing the conversation on her, taking her side in every problem she has, and giving her true appreciation for what she is. Apart from smiling and laughing with her, you should show her at every opportunity that you think she's special - better than any other girl. If you do this with sincerity then soon she'll not be able to get enough of it. And she'll be proud to call herself your girlfriend. So now you know much more about how to get a girlfriend. One of the greatest tools that a person can have is the ability to network. Networking is fundamental to successful businesses and lifelong friendships. Owning a business and failing to network will result in failure. You will have a poor customer base and you will have very few referrals. All the brains in the world will get you nowhere unless you have the ability to effectively create relationships with people. Networking can be a daunting task for individuals who are shy or feel they don't have "social skills." I am an introvert by nature. I struggle to make small talk, and have a hard time initially getting to know people. For the longest time I just accepted the fact that I did not have "social skills," and did nothing to change it. A very wise gentleman once pointed out that it was impossible for me not to have social skills. Humans are social by nature, and whether I liked it or not I was perfectly capable of developing professional relationships. He told me that I was making the choice and that it was not a part of my genetic makeup. As I took a step back and looked at myself, I realized how stupid I had been and how much it was really a matter of choice and not a genetic trait. I have since learned the importance of networking. The relationships that I have built over the years have been extremely instrumental in my success. I have discovered that like anything else, networking is all about practice. It is not something that falls in your lap that you are automatically going to be good at. Networking and social skills are most definitely talents, not traits that an individual inherits. Do not let anyone persuade you otherwise. How To Get Your Ex Back by Ngui Seng Wee in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2009-11-04) Heart-broken, loss, aimless, don't know what to do, find that your life has lost all of its meaning. Sounds familiar? That is what everyone whom experiences a break-up faces. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way, and it's totally natural. However, that is how you feel, and has it ever occurred to you that your ex might feel the same way? Research shows that 90% of the break-ups, both parties still love each other! Meaning that you have 90% chance to get your ex back. Does he/she.. Tries to "indirectly" start a conversation with you? After a break-up, does your ex tries to indirectly speak to you by doing something like sms-ing something totally random to you and say he/she sent wrongly? Most of the time the person didn't send the message wrongly. They just want to start a conversation with you but don't know how. Example if you receive a message suddenly saying "Argh, my leg hurts like hell." Don't go "Huh? Why so random?" It's a total turn off. Still keep the gifts you gave them? If your answer is yes, congratulations! Your chance of getting your ex back has just spiked up! The fact that your ex still keeps those gifts is because they don't want to lose those memories they had with you! It can be from a ring to necklace to soft toys. Behaves in an "extra-happy" manner in front of you? For example, your ex is more of an introvert then an extrovert. After your break-up, he/she suddenly becomes an extrovert and seem unusually outgoing. If that's the case, your ex is trying to put a facade in front of you He/she is trying to act as if they are fine without you, but they actually are not. If they are fine, why do they need to put on a facade? If your answer is yes for all 3 questions, you have almost no problem getting your ex back, as they still have feelings for you and are not willing to let go off you. So after knowing that your ex still loves you and has feelings for you, you must want to know how to get back your ex, and be the same loving couple as before right? Don't stop here! You need to continue your journey on getting your ex back, and try your ever best. If you stop halfway, you have not only failed yourself, but you have also disappoint your ex-but-soon-to-be-again partner! Learn How To Get Your Ex Back Right Now! There is no better time to do this, and you will never regret. http://ezinearticles.com/?Want-to-Get-Your-Ex-Back?---Read-These-3-Simple-Signs-to-See-If-He-Or-She-Still-Loves-You!&id=3188678 As a child I was very introverted, often spending my time on the computer, reading, playing video games, or pursuing other solo hobbies. I'd spend time outdoors biking, exploring the nearby fields and hills (which today are filled with houses), or shooting hoops, but I'd usually favor doing these things alone or with people I knew very well. I never felt too comfortable around strangers, and I never cared for big family events. Psychological tests like the Myers-Briggs pegged me squarely as an introvert. Anyone who knew me would have described me as an introvert without a second thought. Like many introverts I was pressured by others to socialize more. But I largely resisted this pressure, partly because I enjoyed being an introvert. I often viewed extroverts as lacking in intelligence and depth, and I can't say I wanted to count myself among them. However, over a long period of time, I eventually found myself becoming more and more extroverted. I embraced spending time with other people, went out of my way to meet new people, could comfortably introduce myself to strangers, and actually enjoyed it. The Myers-Briggs test now labels me an extrovert. To the people who know me today, this wouldn't be surprising. I'm not the kind of extrovert I envisioned as a child though. I feel I've done a good job balancing the introvert and extrovert parts of myself, such that I enjoy both types of activities equally. I feel just as comfortable staying at home reading a book as I do going to a new social event and introducing myself to people I've never met. I enjoy both group and solo activities, each for different reasons. Some weeks I'm far more introverted and mostly stay home with my family. Other weeks I have a full social calendar with an event almost every night. I enjoy both just as much. In order to become an extrovert, I found that I had to overcome several blocks to being more extroverted. Chances are that if you're in the same boat, you have some of these blocks as well. Blocks to becoming an extrovert * Undervaluing extroversion. Spending time alone and with people are equally important. If you're very introverted, you may undervalue the positive role people can play in your life, such as knowledge, friendship, growth, laughter, and so on. The optimal outcome is to strike a balance between the two. You don't have to give up the introvert activities you enjoy. In fact, when you balance them with more social activities, you'll probably find them even more satisfying. After several nights of being around people, I really look forward to a night by myself to read, meditate, write, etc. And after lots of time alone or with my family, I'm itching to go out and be around other people. * Underdeveloped social skills. Social skills can be learned like any other skill set. One reason introverts shy away from social activities is that they don't feel comfortable because they don't know what to do, especially if the unexpected were to occur. Being able to start up a conversation with a stranger AND feel completely comfortable doing it is a learnable skill. The more you do it, the better you get at it. Embrace the fact that you're a beginner, and don't compare yourself to others. * Envisioning yourself as the wrong kind of extrovert. If you find the extroverted people around you shallow and perhaps even annoying, why would you want to be more like them? You wouldn't. When I was a kid, I really didn't want to be more like the extroverts I knew. Even as an adult, my vision of an extrovert was an in-your-face salesperson who only wanted to build a shallow relationship with you so they could sell you something. It seemed very fake and phony to me. And of course that vision prevented me from ever wanting to be like that. But you needn't choose such a limited vision for yourself -- you're free to form your own vision of a positive way to be more extroverted. * Hanging out with the wrong people. Why would you want to spend more time with people you don't like? If becoming more extroverted means spending more time with people you'd rather avoid, you'll have no motivation to do it. Again, you're free to break this pattern and form a social group that you'd love to be a part of. * Overvaluing online socializing. Online socializing has its place in your life, but it's a pale shadow compared to face-to-face, belly-to-belly communication. Voice and body language can communicate a lot more than text, and emotional bonds are easier and faster to establish in person. I feel much closer to the local friends I've known for only a few months than I do to the people I've known online for years but never met in person. It's just not as fun going out to dinner with a laptop. You don't have to do away with online socializing, but don't allow it to crowd out meeting people locally. If you do that, you'll only cause your interpersonal skills to lag further behind. If you have some of these blocks and want to get past them, the first step is to acknowledge them and consider how they're holding you back. Then begin to work on them just as you would any other challenge in your life. Focus your intentions, set goals, make plans, and start taking action. It may be awkward and clumsy at first, but just accept that, and get moving anyway. Suggestions for becoming more extroverted Here are some additional suggestions for how to become more extroverted: * Envision the type of extrovert you'd like to be. What's your ideal outcome? If you feel too introverted and want to be more extroverted, start by working on your vision of your outcome. Chances are that if you've been making little progress in this area, you have a somewhat negative vision of extroverts. When I formed a positive vision of being an extrovert that included building genuine relationships with intelligent people I respect (as opposed to random, shallow socializing), I soon began attracting those relationships. Being a "dumb jock" kind of extrovert still has no appeal to me. * Think of relationships in terms of what you can give, not in terms of what you can get. If you seek to build new relationships based on mutual giving and receiving, you'll have no shortage of friends. Identify people with whom you'd like to build a relationship, and start by giving. I've found that my geeky knowledge is actually a tremendous strength when it comes to socializing because there are an awful lot of non-geeks who'd like to understand geeky stuff better, and I can explain it to them in ways they'll understand. For example, I've been teaching some local speaker friends about blogging and web marketing, and in return I'm learning a lot from them about speaking, humor, etc. There are many intelligent people out there who'd love to have a geek as a friend. What can you bring to a relationship that will be of benefit to someone else? When you figure out what that is (and it's probably many different things), you'll have an easier time attracting new friends into your life. * Find the right social group for you. Consciously consider the types of people you'd want to have as friends. There's no rule that says this has to be your peers or co-workers. I actually find myself more interested in making friends with people who are much older than me as opposed to people my own age or slightly younger. People around my age (34) tend to be very career- and family-oriented, but often in a somewhat mindless, socially conditioned way that isn't centered around any consciously chosen life purpose or belief system. And people in their 20s, while often highly energetic, tend to be largely unfocused... or focused on trivial pursuits that just aren't that important. So it's been difficult for me to find people near my age where we have enough in common for a long-term friendship. I seem to have an easier time making friends with people in their 40s, 50, and older. They typically have greater knowledge and experience, more fascinating stories to share, more resources (information and ideas, financial resources, contacts), and a better sense of who they are and what they want to do with their lives. Often I find myself attending social events where I'm the youngest person in the room, but that feels very comfortable and normal for me. Don't be afraid to stretch beyond the most obvious peer group and hang out with people from different ages, neighborhoods, cultures, countries, etc. You might find the variety to be a lot of fun. * Play from your strengths. It's interesting that many introverts have no trouble socializing online. In that environment they're able to play from their strengths. But you can also use your strengths consciously as leverage to branch out into more face-to-face socializing. For example, after I graduated college, I met a woman on a local BBS (before there was much of a World Wide Web). We got to chatting online over a period of weeks. Eventually we met in person and became friends, and I soon fell into her pre-existing social group through osmosis. My social calendar went from empty to full almost overnight. That woman, by the way, has been my wife for the past 7.5 years. If you socialize online, see if you can't use that strength to build new local relationships. While people have done this in global forums like online games, I think it's easier to try it in local forums. For instance, there are message boards for people who've recently moved to Las Vegas. * Join a club. It's old advice, but it still works. The advantage is that you'll find people who share similar interests, which makes it easier to build new relationships. One good club can fill your social calendar. For example, through my membership in Toastmasters, I get invitations to lots of other local social events. I don't go to everything, but it's nice to get those invites. Plus belonging to an international organization with 200,000 members worldwide creates social inroads around the planet. If you join a club and find that it's not right for you, quit and join something else. My wife and I have both been through a number of local social groups that just didn't resonate with us (too boring, too slow, too disorganized, too many alcoholics). But one good group is all you need. * Develop your social skills consciously. You can learn to become better at building rapport, introducing yourself, keeping a conversation going, asking someone out on a date, feeling socially comfortable instead of nervous, and so on. You don't need to be shallow and manipulative about it, but genuinely build these skills because it will greatly enhance your life. One approach I find extremely effective is to ask the other person how s/he got started in his/her current line of work. 80-90% of the time the person will say something like, "Well, that's an interesting story...." And I genuinely like hearing these stories. A small basic set of social skills can go a long way because you'll get to reuse them every time you meet someone. Whatever skill you'd like to develop, try doing a Google or Amazon search on it, and you'll probably find plenty of articles and books. Realize that when you hold yourself back from socializing, you're not only depriving yourself -- you're also depriving other people of the chance to get to know you. How much longer do you want your future spouse or best friend to remain alone? Here are some follow-up posts that further explore this topic: 1. Improving Social Skills 2. A Question for Introverts 3. Risk vs. Reward in Human Relationships How to Improve Communication between Extraverts and Introverts using Myers Briggs by Liz Cassidy in Business (submitted 2009-12-03) Communicating with Other Personalities can be a fun and rewarding experience or it can be an exercise in frustration and futility creating conflict and havoc. Using the Myers Briggs Type Indicator can make communicating with other personalities a lot simpler and creates a map forward out of potential confusion. The Myers Briggs Personality Test uses 4 easy to understand scales creating a 4 letter type. The first scale concerns where we get our energy; from the outer or "Extra" world or from the inner or "Intro" world. Some people have a preference for Extraversion and some have a preference for Introversion. Extraverts tend to have a preference for; action, multiples, many, conversation and having lots of things happening. The typical extrovert is at home in a group where there is lots happening. The typical Extravert also has a Do-Think-Do approach. On the other hand, Introverts tend to prefer; few, quiet, focus, concentration and thinking... The typical extra introvert is at home in an intimate peaceful setting. The typical Introvert also has a Think-Do-Think approach. Thus communicating with Introverts involves giving them space to think; speak and concentrate on their message. When extraverts and introverts work together the possibility exists for an Extravert to crowd or talk over an Introvert without realising what he is doing. This can lead Introverts to be quite annoyed and in some cases fell under valued as people. Equally when Introverts do not say what they are thinking the Extraverts may be misled into thinking that the introverts are cold and aloof when in fact the Introverts simply do not feel like talking. During target="target""communicating with different personalities" workshops I frequently get asked by Introverts why the Extraverts are so confident. This question shocks the Extraverts in the room as they are as insecure or as confident in themselves as Introverts. There is no difference in confidence levels between the two types. The introverts in this case assume that the Extraverts propensity to act first and think later is the same as acting with Confidence. And so the misunderstandings between Extraverts and Introverts are easily explained with some simple conversations. How To Know Whether Or Not A Man Is Emotionally Available by Aaron Adams in Other (submitted 2008-03-14) Imagine two needles. One of them is lost in a stack of needles, and the other one is lost in a seemingly endless haystack. The former compares to how normal women perceive an unavailable man. The latter vies to how wise women, in their sophisticated way of thinking, perceives an unavailable man; hard to identify, but once recognized, stands out so well that he actually pulls all eyes towards him. However, that kind of standing out requires so much attention to detail that it would be hard to do without some guidelines. So here are some ideas to find that needle in a haystack. Emotionally unavailable men are not outright introverts, but not all-out extroverts either. They are magnet-like, pulling people towards them. Their qualities make them the master of many relationships. But since they have the typical introverted quality, the stability of these relationships are often dependent on the balance of emotions. And even though an unavailable man may show pure commitment, when the balance tips the emotions over, these relationships become meaningless, and consequently short-lived. Be wary when he says "I just want to keep my options open," it just means that he does not want to be exclusively tied to one person. The next fact that you would want to look for is the truth that emotionally unavailable men are more volatile than most women - they just don't know what they want, even if the options were staring them in the face. If you would dig every one of the relationships he had in the past few months, it would be like looking at a montage of Hollywood celebrities - these girls look different and have very different personalities. No, he doesn't lack his standards of taste. He just doesn't know which taste exactly arouses his emotions. Finally, when women do find them, and do date them, practically beating the odds of nature, there's one more thing they ought to know: never ever, under any sane circumstance, try to change them. It's a common mistake, and by far, is the best way to cause a relationship to self-destruct. Okay, let's face the inevitable truth that women always want to become "the one" for a guy they like. In this case, were talking of the emotionally unavailable guy who apparently isn't so sure how to look for the "one." When a woman forces him to a stalemate of commitment, where neither side will have any options of looking away, he tends to feel the burden of emotional effort he has to invest. And believe me, that really won't make him happy, or even feel at ease. So ladies, don't try to put chains around his neck just so he'd bequeath a hundred percent of his commitment to you - that would just break his neck. Instead, do it with fine subtlety. If you're the "one", then you're the "one". He wouldn't feel the pressure if that was the case, making the relationship feel more "meant to be" that "made to be". But even though dating emotionally unavailable men seems to be more of a risk than a stroll in the park, there are actually hints for women to pick up early in the game. Most of them are logically easy to spot, while others are like jigsaw puzzles that need analysis. Spotting them could mean the difference to a relationship's success, or its downfall. And since we're talking of a relationship that normally puts emotions on the line, women are better off not risking anything when it looks like everything's not going to be smooth. Looking at him from perspective, the emotionally unavailable man is definitely not playing the commitment game, although he doesn't shun it out completely to the point that he doesn't consider anything out of it. The fact remains that he just plays his cards well - sometimes on the safe side, at other times bluffing to the point that he may not even know what he exactly is doing. If you're a woman who's stuck to this type of guy, find time to observe him with depth. Try to read his game if you can; identification is the best weapon the arsenal of the getting to know you game. If you do well, then you might just win a wonderful relationship. Otherwise, if it involves you risking everything for an unsure outcome, fold the cards. Rinse and repeat; try not to lose in the middle of the game. Introverts make up - at the most - 25% of the world's population. This means that introverts have to live and function in a world that was made by and for extroverts. Much of the time, they are dealing with extroverts who go about things in completely different ways than they do, and these extroverts are probably used to dealing with other extroverts like them. Because of this, extroverts often don't understand why introverts are the way they are, and, unfortunately, make ignorant conclusions about the introvert's character and about what's going on inside their heads. If you're an extrovert, read through this list and count up how many of these things you've done in dealing with introverts, and then try to understand our point of view when these things happen. Otherwise, you're probably going to lose a lot of great friendships and work opportunities with introverts and have no idea why. 1. Force them into public settings or large groups because they "need to get out more." Allow introverts to join to group on their own. Invite them in '" introverts often don't like to be the initiator in public settings '" but don't pressure them when they refuse. This is the main difference between introverts and extroverts: Extroverts build up energy from being around other people, while introverts drain energy interacting with others. This doesn't mean they don't enjoy being around people, they just can't handle it for as long and need time alone to recharge. Learning how to make friends is a lonely undertaking that might leave you feeling awkward and tongue-tied. Exploring how to make friends when you're an adult introvert is even worse. Even so, friendship is just three steps away. Examine Your Need for Friendship: Why Do You Want To Learn How To Make Friends? As an introvert adult, you enjoy solitary activities by choice. Nevertheless, friendship is a desirable element in your social makeup. Discern if you are looking for a best friend, with whom you share a large number of common interests and - in due time - a strong bond; conversely, do you miss having more lighthearted interactions that do not have the same intensity of close friendships? Examples would be the coworker with whom you enjoy afternoon lunch, the neighbor whose backyard barbeque invites you occasionally accept or the deli clerk with her quirky stories of "the old country." The desired intensity of the friendship determines where to start when learning how to make friends as an adult introvert. For example, a deep, intense friendship may be easiest to find when joining a spiritual community. Conversely, an acquaintance or pal is someone you can find just by attending lectures or events in your neighborhood. Advertising Your Need: The Mortifying Part of Learning How to Make Friends In her book entitled "The Friendship Crisis," author Marla Paul points out that loneliness is far more widespread than you might want to imagine. For every person you see paired with a buddy or enjoying a lunch with a group, there are countless others you do not see, in part, because they are alone and see no reason to leave the home because of their loneliness. How to Memorize Using the Grouping Technique by Mark Pennington in Education (submitted 2008-11-23) The grouping technique can be an effective tool to help you memorize items that can be placed into categories. We know from recent hemispheric brain research that our brains act as computer file folders, slotting newly learned information in the same file as already-learned information that fits within that same file. If we take the time to organize new information in same way that our brains do, we can enhance our retention of that information. The categories we develop to remember similar items don't have to be organized by content. Any similarities can be used to classify items as a group. For example, a group of people could be classified according to sex, body size, color of skin, eye or hair color, introverted-extroverted-the possibilities are endless. Let's learn how to use the Grouping Technique to remember a list of nine items. You are driving into work and your friend phones to tell you that you've been invited to go on a backpacking trip next weekend. "Sure, I'll remember what to bring," you respond to your friend. The equipment list includes the following: tent, flashlight, stove, matches, sleeping bag, fuel, utensils, ground cloth, food At first glance, the equipment items might appear to be quite random and you may be thinking that you will have to sacrifice your pride and call your friend back later to remind you of some of the items the backpacking list. After all, if you are responsible for bringing the food, you don't want to forget that item! But, instead, you take a few moments to apply the Grouping Technique and you have the list memorized perfectly. You simply categorize the items into these groups: Sleeping -sleeping bag -tent -ground cloth Light/Fire -matches -stove -flashlight -fuel Eating -food -utensils Works, doesn't it? Notice that the categories do not have to contain equal numbers of the similar items. Also, a few exceptions would certainly be easier to remember than memorizing the entire list of information as random, un-related items. For abstract concepts, try substituting them with concrete objects to place them within your groups. For example, it is easier to substitute and place the Liberty Bell into a category than the concept of "freedom." Memorizing using the Grouping Technique will enable you to retain the memory of many seemingly unrelated items. Frequent rehearsal of the categories and their items will place the information into your long-term memory. Useful for upcoming tests, speeches, lectures, conversations, party planning, shopping lists? I should say so. How To Seduce Women by Little J in Relationships / Sexuality (submitted 2007-09-04) The biggest mistake most men make is assuming women think like them. You see women have a Big Project that looms over everything they do; they can bear children. Pick the right man, and they'll have healthy, happy, successful, loving children. Pick the wrong one, and they might not even get to have any at all. There's not a woman alive that doesn't occasionally look wistfully at little children, and wonders what might be, or what might have have been. So while it's perfectly acceptable for a man to be Jack The Lad, with a girl in every port, any woman who behaves that way is seen to be a tart. Not only could she get pregnant, but as a woman she is more susceptible to sexually transmitted disease, and will suffer more if she gets one. So, you'll have to excuse women if they seem unreasonable; they're playing for far higher stakes. To find and keep the love of your life, you have to have a chat with yourself: what kind of woman do you truly like? Now, I know any half-naked hussy can get the ol' motor revving. But, if you examine your responses objectively, you'll find that a type emerges: slim or rounded, dark or blond, extroverted or introverted. There's a film star that you can't help but gawp at when she's on the screen. There's a type of girl that causes your head to swivel when you're walking down the street. That's the type you should go for; the one that excites an automatic, positive response. You'll find it easier to talk to this type of girl. If you have found your 'true love' she'll feel the same way about you. You have genes that'll help her make a better baby; she does the same for you. So how to seduce such a woman? Well, it's not hard. When you first make eye contact, smile. If she smiles back, you're in. Then go up, and say hello. After that, take your cue from her. She likes you, so you don't have to jabber. You can say the most banal things; it's your appearance, and the sound of your voice, that're doing most of the work. If you're nervous, just tell yourself: "plenty more fish in the sea(!)". You'll have a lot more confidence if you've got some money in the bank, an apartment and a car of your own; these should be a priority. You should also dress well. Dressing well means your appearance exudes power: you're in control of your destiny. Women like to be taken care of; project that you can do that, and you're half-way home. Your personal circumstances also affect how you behave: a man who is well-off will project that unconsciously, and be more successful with women. Hello I thought I give you folks some reading material. Great stuff and things to learn it has helped out thousands. Turned novice lovers into expert, check it out! If you can't get laid after following some of these tactics then you need to become a priest because having sex is just not for you even with proven skills that never fail! How To Stave Off The Crazy-Making Isolation That Comes With Working From Home by Cari Vollmer in Business / Small Business (submitted 2011-06-23) How do you manage the aloneness that comes along with being a solo-entrepreneur? It???s a situation many solo-entrepreneurs find themselves in and even though you???re living your dream, too much alone time gets old really fast! So what???s an entrepreneur to do? Whether you???re an introvert or extrovert and whether you???ve just started your business or been at it awhile these tips will help you stave off an entrepreneur???s worst enemy: crazy-making isolation! Balance work with pleasure You know that question, what are you doing when you lose all track of time? A passionate entrepreneur knows their exact answer to that question because this is a passionate entrepreneur???s life ??? doing work they love! I know it???s hard to pull yourself away from work you love doing but if you???ve been sitting behind that desk for too many hours one day you???ll look up and you???ll have totally forgotten what you used to do for fun, you???ll suddenly feel isolated, and the joy will start seeping away. So do this: be sure to schedule good old fashioned fun and games into your calendar so you do get a break. Not only will it keep your life balanced, taking a break has other benefits: it will actually make you MORE creative and MORE productive. Don???t be afraid of cutting loose. Schedule time out of your office Is there a colleague you can meet with every week for coffee and a mini-brainstorming session? Do you need to jumpstart your exercise routine? Have you been getting the nudge to volunteer your time to a good cause? Scheduling time out of the office, especially when it allows you to shake up your routine is a very good thing! Just like balancing work with pleasure opens up your creative channels, so will scheduling regular time away from your office. Do this: right now open your calendar, pick something you???d like to do and get it scheduled in your calendar. Put it down, in black and white, and then stick with it. Attend local and out of state events Networking is an important part of every business owner???s growth strategy. What clubs, organizations or other events can you attend? Doing so is smart because it will get you in front of others, including key influencers in your industry and potential clients. Do not stay at home if you want to grow your business. You???ve got to get out there so pick a couple of events that really speak to you, register and go! Join communities, including masterminds Make good use of your time out of the office by associating with other like-minded people that support you and your growth. Consider joining online communities where a lot of your types of people gather! Also, if you want to seriously give your business a boost consider joining a specialized mastermind program. Mastermind programs are a great way to surround yourself with the support of other like-minded people that are as committed to their growth as you are. Schedule regular calls with key colleagues and partners Having people in your corner is vital to your success therefore schedule regular calls with key colleagues and partners. Support and encourage each other, as well as help each other fill in missing pieces. This is another great way to get support and it???s also an amazing way to GIVE support to others you want to see succeed. The key: be deliberate about how you choose to spend your time. Be purposeful in what you choose to do with your time by making sure it supports the life you want to create. Your Assignment: Make a list of things that DON???T support the life you???re creating AND a list of things that do. Start removing those that don???t and adding those that do! This may take a little time to accomplish but OVER TIME you???ll see a marked improvement. It???s all up to you. Give it everything you???ve got! How To Treat Your Shy Children by J.P. Morton in Family / Parenting (submitted 2010-03-17) In this article I'd like to discuss several tips, tricks, and tactics that you can use to help deal with your shy child. Let me begin by saying right off the bat that I don't think there's anything particularly wrong with being shy. Some people are born introverts and some people are born extroverts and there is nothing inherently good or bad about either of those. Psychologically it's simply a matter of our brains being able to process multiple signals at once versus only a few at a time. Those that process many signals tend to be extroverted and those the process few tend to be introverted. It has nothing to do with intelligence or anything like that, it's a simple mechanical process akin to multitasking. That being said there are several things you can do to help your shy child become more outgoing and I think we can all agree that this sort of thing should be beneficial to your child . First of all give your child the time that they need to become comfortable with a thing. Many times children aren't shy, they're just a little nervous or scared and they need more time to get used to a thing than you might expect. Patience goes a long way here and letting them know that they have all the time they need can be important. Next let your child know that their participation in a particular activity has to be partly their decision. It's incredibly important to give your child a choice when it comes to things like this. Making them feel like they have some control of the situation can work wonders and can also help them build confidence and allow them to venture forth into new things later on. Criticizing your kids shyness does not help in any way, shape, or form and can particularly damage them in a number of ways such as undermining their self-confidence and making them less likely to try new things in the future. That leads us into my next tip which is to not label your child as introverted or shy. If a kid always hears his parents calling him shy to himself or to others he or she will start to believe it even if they aren't actually shy. It's often easy for parents, especially when talking to other parents to say something like "oh he's the shy one in the family" or something like that but you really want to stop yourself from saying things like that because it can have a massive negative effect on your child- especially over time as they continue to hear these things day after day and year after year. So there you have several tips and tricks is you can use to handle the behavior of your shy child. Some of these tips will help push your child into more outgoing territory but remember, at the end of the day that some of the most famous people in history of the world were brutally shy... just something to keep in mind! How to Unleash Your Inner Comedian by Doug Stevenson in Business (submitted 2006-12-05) Where did we learn that we have to be serious all the time to be taken seriously? In my experience, it's just not true. When people laugh, they learn. With this in mind, let's explore how you can be funnier when you give a speech or presentation. I've coached thousands of speakers and have come to one simple conclusion: everybody is funny. But most of us have spent years trying not to be funny in professional situations in an attempt to be taken seriously. As a result most people don't have a clue what their funny looks, sounds and feels like. The challenge of humor is to be as funny when you are in front of an audience as you are with colleagues and friends at work or at a cocktail party. You must be able to witness your naturally funny behavior in order to bring that "funny" to the platform. That behavior includes vocal rhythms and volume, physical gestures and mannerisms and a sense of joy and playfulness. Let's focus on three elements that will make you funnier: comedy writing, exaggeration and playfulness. Comedy Writing: Comedy is structure combined with delivery. While delivery is essential, structure is equally important. In fact, when the structure is excellent, almost anyone can deliver the same material and it will get the laugh. Let's look at a technique called a "triple". In this example, I use a triple to illustrate the difference in personality styles between myself and my teenage son. "My son Bennett and I couldn't be more different. I'm an extrovert - he's an introvert. I'm creative - he's linear. I'm verbal - he's (hold for two beats) an engineer." In a "triple", rather than using one or two examples to explain something, use three instead. The first two set a pattern and the third breaks the pattern with a humorous twist. Triples get a laugh because of structure. In the example used above, I always get a good laugh on the word, engineer. Why? Let's break it down. First of all, I'm playing off of common knowledge of personality descriptions. Everyone is aware of the personality categories of introverts and extroverts. That example lays the foundation for the "triple." Introverts and extroverts set up the pattern of opposites. "Creative" and "linear" continues the pattern because creative people are known to be non-linear thinkers. To aid in this second example I use a gesture with my hands to indicate the difference between creative and linear. On the word "creative" my hands fly all over the place. On the word "linear" I hold my hands in front of me with the palms facing each other about three inches apart. I then move them from right to left as if organizing my socks by the day of the week. In the third example, when I say the word "verbal", the logical progression of opposites would be "non-verbal." By substituting the word "engineer" I have used the ultimate weapon of comedy structure, surprise. It is an illogical, logical substitution. Engineers are non-verbal. Since there are engineers in most business audiences, and since engineers are known be be more cerebral than verbal, the device works. Where does this kind of structure evolve? In the writing. It happens when you are writing your script and rehearsing their delivery. You may get lucky and discover something funny spontaneously on the platform every once in awhile, but if you want results that you can count on day in and day out, write your comedy. Exaggeration: Exaggeration in comedy simply means that you take something to the extremes. Take your idea, gesture or situation and keep going, broaden it - blow it all out of proportion. There are three forms of exaggeration: Exaggerating the facts: I tell all my students, "Don't let the facts get in the way of a good story." What I mean is that embellishment is the backbone of comedy. When you want a laugh, stretch the truth. Here's an example. Truth: I fell down a couple of stairs and skinned my knee. Exaggeration: I was walking down a flight of steps and I tripped and went flying through the air. I grabbed for the railing and it came off in my hand. As I was falling forward, a nine foot railing in my hand, I swung around and let go of the railing. It went sailing through the air and crashed through the windshield of my boss's car. Luckily for me, I only scraped my knee. Exaggerating vocally: Emphasize emotional states with vocal exaggeration such as volume. Get loud for panic or if something is ridiculous. Exaggerating physically: I have yet to work with anyone, including high level executives and accountants, who wasn't able to get a laugh simply by exaggerating a physical or facial reaction. Physical comedy is non-verbal. It takes place in reaction to an inner or outer stimulus. Physical comedy, whether it's a gesture, a melodramatic freeze or a facial expression, takes time. You have to deliver a sentence, take the time to fill the next moment with a reaction, and then go on. Without completing the reaction, the bit won't work. It always takes longer than most non-comedians think - so triple the length of the reaction. If you observe yourself closely, you may discover that you are more animated off the platform than on it. In other words, you exaggerate naturally, and then tone it down for performance. That's backwards. Exaggerate and you will get laughs. Playfulness: Playfulness is a quality, but also is an ingredient in comedic performance. Funny people have fun while they perform. This attitude of playfulness occurs on two levels. The first level is with myself. The second level is with my audience. When you are playful with your own personality, material and style, it gives the audience permission to laugh along with you. We know this as self-deprecating humor. I call it self-loving humor. Without loving yourself, it is hard to make fun of yourself in a way that creates connection and safety with the audience. Having created a level of safety with your audience, they will allow you to be playful with them, as well. In conclusion, it's not true that you have to be serious all the time to be taken seriously. So loosen up and get playful! You'll be laughing all the way to the bank. How to Use 'Personality-Based Marketing' to Build Your Business by Dr. Larina Kase in Marketing (submitted 2009-03-02) As you know, marketing is all about psychology. Most people think of the psychology of their prospects because we must direct our efforts towards our prospects??? needs and wants. While this is certainly important and I teach these ideas as well, equally important is the psychology of YOU. I discuss talent-based marketing and personality-based marketing to remind you to keep yourself in the equation. You will be the one creating and follow-through with your marketing strategy so it must reflect you enough to keep you motivated and focused. When you understand and use strategies that are the right fit for your personality, you can do them with much less time, energy, money, and effort. That???s always the goal, right? Two aspects of personality that I???ll discuss here are introversion/extroversion and sensation-seeking. I chose these two dimensions because they are some of the more heritable (or biologically-driven) personality traits. Introverts tend to gain energy from introspection and time to reflect whereas extroverts refuel and recharge by time with others. While it???s best to have a mix of marketing activities, introverts may need more introspective activities such as writing, and extroverts may need more interactive activities. I, for example, as an extrovert do great with joint venture projects in which my partners and I discuss marketing activities and analyze the results out loud. I???ve had a couple extreme-extrovert clients hire me just to listen so they can think out loud (of course I can???t help but add my 2 cents). Sensation-seeking is how much you have a need for novelty and adventure. If you are high on this trait you need a mix of marketing activities so that you don???t get bored. You will do great with organizing high-exposure publicity stunts. If you???re low on this dimension, you will do well with a slow and steady wins the race approach. Take some time to think about your personality and how it impacts your marketing. If you???ve taken the Myers Briggs Type Indicator test, consider those dimensions. Then revise your marketing plan so it best matches your personality. Watch your energy, persistence, action, and results soar! How-To Cut Leads Qualifying Time: Recruiting Tips by Abby Lawal in Business / ECommerce (submitted 2008-07-21) Copyright (c) 2008 Abby Lawal Recruiting is the most challenging aspect of network marketing business - since your ability to grow your down-line or get commission basically depends on how many people you are able to bring into the company, makes the word R-E-C-R-U-I-T-I-N-G to be one of the most important phrases among network marketers. How-To Automate Your Recruiting Process The old school of prospecting include bugging your family and friends, holding hotel meetings and anyone within 3 feet to you is your prospect (the good old 3 foot rule) - the problem with these methods is the fact that it doesn't seem to turn out exactly as it was presented to you during the sales meeting. The other part of it is the fact that some extroverts may get some trill using these methods because they love socializing anyway, yet it is not as if they go too far with it either but at least they are able to present their opportunity. Lets take the fact that the old school techniques does not produce the expected result out of the way and examine the people who are naturally introvert and are not comfortable with meeting new people or talking to strangers - does it mean they should keep away from network marketing business? If your answer to above question is, NO. That is what I thought also. I think either you are an extrovert or introvert, you should have the opportunity to present your opportunity and succeed in network marketing. The question is - how do you attain network marketing recruiting success without going too far from your comfort zone and attain great result? This is where recruiting tips and technique comes in; the use of automation to pre-qualify your leads is one of the most important steps. It does not just cut your processing time, it allows you to talk to people who are genuinely interested in what you do, have an idea of what you going to talk about and the most important part is, who is also expecting and excited about your call. I know that the use of online lead generation and viral marketing to build down-line may sound like a foreign language to some network markers, yet it may well be the breakthrough key for network marketers who are shy to meet with new people or don't like to talk for too long on the phone or who simply doesn't have much time to devote on their business need to succeed online - it has worked for many gurus both in the network marketing and other online businesses, so it is save to say it is a proven method. Automation Benefits The primary benefit for online lead generation is the fact that it already help pre-qualify and sort your leads - you only talk to the people who are interested and ready to hear more about your opportunity. Extroversion and Introversion Extroversion and introversion are very popular terms and are widely used in personality tests. People often regard themselves as being either an extrovert or an introvert. Below I have outlined what each type is as well as their strengths. Extroversion What is an extrovert? Extroverts are interested in the external world. Their focus is on people and objects. They enjoy being with others and like group activities. As such, they like to be noticed. Extroverts find it difficult being alone and feel lonely if they are not with other people. Possessions and success are valued by an extrovert. It is estimated that extroverts outrank introverts 3 to 1. Research carried out by Twenge (2001) found that extroversion appeared to have become more prevalent in the US over the years. This may not mean that there are more extroverts out there - rather it could be that extroversion has become a more acceptable personality trait than it was decades ago. What are the strengths of an extrovert? Extroverts like to focus on concrete reality and as such are practical and have common sense. They make decisions easily and quickly take action. Extroverts are sociable, enthusiastic and eager to try new things. They can live in the present, without worrying about the future. Their desire for success means they relish achievements. Introversion What is an introvert? Introverts are concerned with their own thoughts and feelings. They are quieter than extroverts and prefer to be removed from the social world. As such they are happy being alone. Introverts do socialise but it will be with a few close friends rather than large groups of people. They will probably feel lonelier in a crowd than on their own. Introverts prefer to plan and analyse things and are careful in their decision making. What are the strengths of an introvert? Introverts are capable of introspection and self-knowledge. They value their own standards and principles and as such are independent minded. Other people are not needed for their entertainment or stimulation. Introverts are interested in what is going on underneath rather than being concerned with trivial matters. An introvert will be imaginative and intuitive. Assumptions made about introverts There is often a tendency to see introversion as a problem that needs to be corrected. This is not the case. Introversion is not about being shy, depressed or lacking confidence. It is not about having bad social skills either. They just do not need the external world as much as an extrovert for their happiness. Introverts are happy as they are and do not need to be taken out of themselves. Introverts may not give much away about themselves. It is therefore important to not make assumptions about what is going on for them or what they really want. Ambiverts Remember, we are all unique and have our own set of characteristics. It is unlikely that a person is totally extrovert or totally introvert. In fact most people are probably ambiverts - sometimes concerned with their environment, sometimes with themselves. This idea is important as it can help you see that you are not all or nothing. It is also an idea to reflect on when you hear someone refer to themselves or another as extrovert or introvert. Reference Twenge, J.M. (2001) Birth cohort changes in extroversion: a cross-temporal meta-analysis, 1966-1993. Personality and Individual Differences, 30, 735-748 Introvert is like a Cinderella hanging around to be noticed by ESTERI MAINA in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2008-10-17) Introvert is like a Cinderella hanging around to be noticed Between the two genders of humanity, women are the ones who become introverted starting from when they are little girls. Most of the time, the mothers of such girls with low self-esteem suffers from the same but do seem desperate to instill in their daughters all the confidence and morale they lack themselves. A mother plays a huge role in a child???s perception of herself in that, how those little girls??? feels inside is influenced by them. This has mostly to do with the physical part of it. If a mum hates her body or parts of it, then she does not feel beautiful enough even in front of her husband. So coveted is a super- flat bellied, fair skinned woman that every one want to be her. Such are the wives who feel insecure when their husbands come home late or spend time clubbing because they fear they could be cheating on them. They might therefore think that they are raising an extrovert but the truth is, the little girl becomes a perfect introvert as she grows up. This is because she copies her mother and she can tell when she is not happy about her self image and if she is not corrected at this point she will surely resemble her mother, who could have been raised by such a mother too. As children One may think that dating starts when one becomes a teenager but this is not so. Just take time to listen to the kids and you might notice that they keep special relationships too. Their story might not be wide like that of adults because one only needs to make friends, who they can play, do school assignments, and go to Sunday school with. But the fact that madness of today???s world have corrupted the minds of the little angles of God also can not be underrated, some even know about pornography and get girlfriends to try what they watch or see on magazines. An introverted kid does not have any poor upbringing in terms of conduct; they are most obedient kids you can get. They become quiet because in their young brains, they have myriad of questions that they believe even their mothers do not have the answers to. They are isolated by others during various childhood games, they are often taken advantage of by their own peers and if you evaluated them closely, they are discontented kids. Parents who raise this breed of introvert are keen on whipping them or even calling them names when they go wrong, not being conscious of the damage this has on their self worth. Calling them words like ???you fool, you are such a looser??? for instance, when they are unable to comprehend something registers this way in their brains. They may be overachievers in school or underachievers??? sneaking in between class lessons depending on whose teacher is their favorite. At adolescence The bleeding wounds from the past hurt and traumas of the childhood can become pronounced at this stage. It is at this stage that the work of hormones materializes bringing yet a bunch of mysteries the introvert may not be able handle. I remember when I was a teenage myself, I felt shy when my body started becoming different, and those of my friends remained the same. In others words, an introvert girl child may withdraw from all friends and everything because the feelings of not being worthy of being loved only increases. read more information from the site link below The introvert myth continues to perpetuate possibly because of the use of the word almost exclusively as a noun, not a verb. Let's first look at how we commonly use the word as a noun to label people and then on to why it is a myth. Did you know that introvert and extrovert, the words, are actually verbs too? Yes; we introvert and extrovert, all day long. That being the case, neither is better than the other. It's simply action. At work or in your life at times we find ourselves - researching, planning, writing, editing - all introverting actions. At other times we will be - making a presentation, attending a business event, entertaining friends at home, speaking to a group - all extroverting actions. The list can go on: introverting includes reading, gardening, thinking, listening; extroverting includes sports games, traveling with others, group discussions. Introvert actions are usually done by oneself while extroverting includes others. We have a preference along the continuum that is occurring all day long. We have that preference because it is an innate brain preference which directs where on the continuum of these actions we will have the most energy and stamina in those actions. Consider the brainstorming perspective. "Brainstorming or bouncing ideas around aloud excite me," is an extraverting way of solving a problem. The out loud sharing process energizes an extrovert. Given a choice, the introvert would prefer to use analysis and thinking to come up with solutions. The next time someone passes on the first round of brainstorming, they may be more introverted. But after some internal think time, the introvert is ready to contribute. It's an introvert and extrovert approach to the same activity. Does this make sense? Where is your preference on the continuum? If you know with certainty, because of your energy sensitivity or an assessment test, then while you may say, "I am an introvert," you say it because you know where you prefer to be on the behaving continuum. Introvert or Extrovert - Be Daring to Look Within, Looking Outside of Self Will Never Satisfy You by Pamela Skuse in Self Help / Coaching (submitted 2009-08-17) What story character are you acting out in this lifetime? Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Have a look at your experiences, the kind of relationships you have with others. Your friends may have similar interests and desires, but does your family unit have different characters or personalities? Are you an introvert and they are an extrovert or vice versa? What is the balance, the mid-way point between the two dual polarities? To address your issues, problems and challenges can be broken down into 3 main categories. 1. Timid, Shy, Introvert 2. Bold, Brave, Extrovert 3. Say Yes, for Balance - Be Daring 4. Looking Outside of Self Will Never Satisfy You Let's take a look at each individual category: 1. Timid, Shy Introvert - Are you quiet, timid and shy if so why? Are you an introvert and withdrawn? Are you nervous, fearful, hesitant, coy, apprehensive and faint-hearted? Are you bashful, modest or just a non-assertive person? Do you demonstrate a lack of courage or self-assurance? Are you easily frightened? Are you unwilling to trust or put confidence in somebody or something? Are you reluctant and fearful of making a commitment? Do you shy away, to move suddenly in fright or alarm? Do you stay away, to avoid or evade something? Are you a reserved person, a shy person who tends not to socialize? Do you focus on yourself - are your feelings and thoughts directed inward? Can you turn within, to direct or turn something inward or to go within to self-examine or dwell on personal thoughts, feelings and motives? 2. Bold, Brave, Extrovert - Are you bold, daring and courageous? Are you an outgoing live-wire that's assertive and confident? Does your assertiveness go a step too far to turn into aggression? Are you a sociable, cheeky and a friendly extrovert? Are you fearless and adventurous? Are you willing and eager to face danger or an adventure with a sense of confidence and fearlessness? Do you require or show fearlessness and daringness? Are you original in what you do? Are you impudent or presumptuous, to lack modesty or impolitely assertive? Are you clear and conspicuous, to stand out and therefore easily noticed, to always be in the limelight? Do you have or show courage, especially when facing danger, difficulty, or pain? Are you an outgoing person - somebody who is sociable and self-confident? Do you have an interest outside self - somebody whose interests are directed outside the self? Can you direct your interest inward, to look within self? 3. Say Yes, for Balance - Be Daring - There is no right or wrong with being an introvert or an extrovert. However, both parties can have a facet that is imbalanced or a limitation to achieve something grander than what they can presently perceive. Due to a timid and shy nature, an introvert maybe non-assertive and can often attract others who suppress, control and disempower them. Because they can be subservient they do have a deeper motive to get out of the victim mentally to gain more master-ship over their life. Because they are shy and reserved on the outer and appear to others as being weak they can develop greater courage on the inner. A disempowered person is more likely to resort to their shadow potential of being bold, fearless and brave, to begin to act out their hidden extrovert qualities, because they have nothing to lose. When they allow themselves to be disempowered, everything that they look at in the outer world is filled with controls, limitations and manipulations. They have no where to go but to begin to look within self, to discover their inner strength by becoming awakened and aware of the conflicts within themselves. When they do this, they can obtain more strength, assertiveness and confidence on the outside, because energy is reflected from the inner to the outer. 4. Looking Outside of Self Will Never Satisfy You - On the other hand, an extrovert is perceived to be bold, brave or a free-spirit on the outer. This is can be a fa???ade in order to act out their assertion, strength, control, aggression and force to cover up a hidden fear or weakness within. They gain their external power through control and dominance and whilst they keep acquiring their exterior status they won't have the desire to ever want to look within, to discover their own hidden weaknesses. Focusing on the outer distracts them from looking within. Why would they want to change their life when they can get what they want from others? When they are being outwardly fulfilled financially, materially, socially, physically or sexually, they keep their focus on the outer physical-material world and they have no real need to ever want to become awakened to look within, because they can keep trying to fulfil their needs from others - to feed off others, to disempower others. The more they get, the more they want and their desires and needs are never satisfied and their soul can never be fulfilled because they lack the motivation to seek inner growth that will inspire and expand their consciousness. Blaming others for their adversity experiences can be a crippling factor for both parties if they are unaware of taking responsibility and looking within to discover their fears and inner conflicts. Unfortunately, it is often a crisis of some kind that will force them to ever have a desire to question their reality and to begin to look within. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert or an extrovert as long as they can find the mid line balance between the two extremes. It is to be willing to take their focus off the outside world, accept responsibility for their experiences without blaming others and say yes, for balance, to be bold, brave and daring to look within to discover hidden fears and conflicts. When they are brave and fearless on the inside they can reflect that energy on the outside - it won't have an attachment to the ego's fa???ade or a dependency pay-off. What story character are you acting out in this lifetime? Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Have a look at your experiences, the kind of relationships you have with others. Your friends may have similar interests and desires, but does your family unit have different characters or personalities? Are you an introvert and they are an extrovert or vice versa? What is the balance, the mid-way point between the two dual polarities? To address your issues, problems and challenges can be broken down into 3 main categories. 1. Timid, Shy, Introvert 2. Bold, Brave, Extrovert 3. Say Yes, for Balance - Be Daring 4. Looking Outside of Self Will Never Satisfy You Let's take a look at each individual category: 1. Timid, Shy Introvert - Are you quiet, timid and shy if so why? Are you an introvert and withdrawn? Are you nervous, fearful, hesitant, coy, apprehensive and faint-hearted? Are you bashful, modest or just a non-assertive person? Do you demonstrate a lack of courage or self-assurance? Are you easily frightened? Are you unwilling to trust or put confidence in somebody or something? Are you reluctant and fearful of making a commitment? Do you shy away, to move suddenly in fright or alarm? Do you stay away, to avoid or evade something? Are you a reserved person, a shy person who tends not to socialize? Do you focus on yourself - are your feelings and thoughts directed inward? Can you turn within, to direct or turn something inward or to go within to self-examine or dwell on personal thoughts, feelings and motives? 2. Bold, Brave, Extrovert - Are you bold, daring and courageous? Are you an outgoing live-wire that's assertive and confident? Does your assertiveness go a step too far to turn into aggression? Are you a sociable, cheeky and a friendly extrovert? Are you fearless and adventurous? Are you willing and eager to face danger or an adventure with a sense of confidence and fearlessness? Do you require or show fearlessness and daringness? Are you original in what you do? Are you impudent or presumptuous, to lack modesty or impolitely assertive? Are you clear and conspicuous, to stand out and therefore easily noticed, to always be in the limelight? Do you have or show courage, especially when facing danger, difficulty, or pain? Are you an outgoing person - somebody who is sociable and self-confident? Do you have an interest outside self - somebody whose interests are directed outside the self? Can you direct your interest inward, to look within self? 3. Say Yes, for Balance - Be Daring - There is no right or wrong with being an introvert or an extrovert. However, both parties can have a facet that is imbalanced or a limitation to achieve something grander than what they can presently perceive. Due to a timid and shy nature, an introvert maybe non-assertive and can often attract others who suppress, control and disempower them. Because they can be subservient they do have a deeper motive to get out of the victim mentally to gain more master-ship over their life. Because they are shy and reserved on the outer and appear to others as being weak they can develop greater courage on the inner. A disempowered person is more likely to resort to their shadow potential of being bold, fearless and brave, to begin to act out their hidden extrovert qualities, because they have nothing to lose. When they allow themselves to be disempowered, everything that they look at in the outer world is filled with controls, limitations and manipulations. They have no where to go but to begin to look within self, to discover their inner strength by becoming awakened and aware of the conflicts within themselves. When they do this, they can obtain more strength, assertiveness and confidence on the outside, because energy is reflected from the inner to the outer. 4. Looking Outside of Self Will Never Satisfy You - On the other hand, an extrovert is perceived to be bold, brave or a free-spirit on the outer. This is can be a facade in order to act out their assertion, strength, control, aggression and force to cover up a hidden fear or weakness within. They gain their external power through control and dominance and whilst they keep acquiring their exterior status they won't have the desire to ever want to look within, to discover their own hidden weaknesses. Focusing on the outer distracts them from looking within. Why would they want to change their life when they can get what they want from others? When they are being outwardly fulfilled financially, materially, socially, physically or sexually, they keep their focus on the outer physical-material world and they have no real need to ever want to become awakened to look within, because they can keep trying to fulfill their needs from others - to feed off others, to disempower others. The more they get, the more they want and their desires and needs are never satisfied and their soul can never be fulfilled because they lack the motivation to seek inner growth that will inspire and expand their consciousness. Blaming others for their adversity experiences can be a crippling factor for both parties if they are unaware of taking responsibility and looking within to discover their fears and inner conflicts. Unfortunately, it is often a crisis of some kind that will force them to ever have a desire to question their reality and to begin to look within. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert or an extrovert as long as they can find the mid line balance between the two extremes. It is to be willing to take their focus off the outside world, accept responsibility for their experiences without blaming others and say yes, for balance, to be bold, brave and daring to look within to discover hidden fears and conflicts. When they are brave and fearless on the inside they can reflect that energy on the outside - it won't have an attachment to the ego's façade or a dependency pay-off. Introvert Or Extrovert, Does It Matter In A Marriage? by Chris Snow in Relationships / Marriage (submitted 2006-10-04) It takes all kinds of people to make this world. It is a natural human tendency to categorize people into various "pigeonholes" of definition. Happy, sad, arrogant, rude, smart, lazy, etc. are just some of the adjectives used to describe people. The list is endless and actual fact may surprise more than one. A person perceived as happy may in actual fact be quite unhappy and so on. Two more broad arenas of people types are the introvert and the extrovert. A large majority of people can be broadly classified into these two categories. An introvert is a person who prefers his own company. As a child, he enjoys his own company and does not show much inclination to join the others. He may have one or two friends who he is close to but on the whole prefers to be by himself. At the school level too he would be quiet and go about his work without a song and dance. As an adult, an introvert would prefer to stay at home and read rather than go out. Introverts find pleasure in doing things by themselves and will generally avoid going out to parties or social gatherings as far as is possible. It does not mean they do not like people or are unfriendly. It only means that they pick their friends carefully and are particular about when they want company. On the other hand, extroverts are very outgoing by nature. For them life is a party, and they are always ready to go out, go exploring or have impromptu get-togethers. They need people around them and love to be in the company of friends and family. These people may have a lot of friends but may not have any small select group of friends. They can be relied upon to bring life into any party or get-together by their very infectious joie-de-vivre and happy-go-lucky attitude. Of course, some people force themselves to be the extrovert kind when it goes against their basic mental make-up and this makes them seem loud and brash. Many a time there is a serious underlying psychological reason for an extrovert being too brash and loud and an introvert being badly adjusted. The extrovert may in reality be asking for assurance and the introvert may have deep seated fears that he is not able to sort out. It is said that opposites attract and this is true in the case of most married couples. Invariably you will find that people who are extroverts find life partners who are the very opposite and who have a calming influence on their lives. Similarly, introverts tend to look for partners who can bring some life into their rather quiet lives. The problem arises if the extrovert is not able to handle the introvert's quiet moments and cannot fathom why he wants to stay in when she wants to go out or vice versa. The whole idea behind finding a mate whose nature is opposite is then negated if the two are not able to reach a compromise wherein going out and staying in is balanced in such a way that neither feels tied down. Introvert or extrovert the commonality for us is both have a brain. If it's true about introverts brains being different than extrovert brains then what about our brains make the distinctions in preferences more understandable? The eyes and the brain. Your eyes use 65% of your brainpower, the most out of any body part. So then next to the brain, your eyes are the most powerful body part. This explains why introverts at a networking can unknowingly be sucked up into an energy vacuum. Have you ever noticed how many people are darting their eyes around the room? Then, as an introvert we dart around with our eyes trying to find some friendly faces or a haven to take a break. The darting of eyes, if it's an extrovert, must mean getting fully charged: extroverts go outside of themselves for energy. Is it possible with our eyes that just taking in the surroundings and people in it, our energy goes in full throttle? The mouth and the brain. Marti Olsen Laney's "The Introvert Advantage" cites studies that show introverts have a longer pathway in the brain to access memories or information. The extroverts brain path is shorter and accesses more sensory information. Have you ever been in a brainstorming session and find you want to "pass" on the first round of ideas? If you did, you could be an introvert and need that extra thinking time. If you are ready to open your mouth and jump in with an idea, you could be an extrovert. The front and back of the brain. A study in 2005 stated that PET scans of introverts showed more activity in the brain frontal lobes. This is the area activated for remembering, problem solving and planning. Extroverts show more activity in the brain anterior lobes which involves in-the-moment or recent external stimulated sensory processing like hearing, watching or driving. One person responding to my online survey about sales reluctance said they have a negative stereotype about sales and salespeople -- specifically they are insincere, pushy and don't listen. If such behavior is brain related then it may be because of more access to the back of the brain. After all who would want to have people think of them as insincere, pushy and not listening? Not being a neuroscientist some scientific data isn't easy to understand. What the data does understandably communicate is it is our brains to a good extent that make introverts who they are and extroverts who they are and it's all quite a perfect balance. Not everyone is an introvert by choice. There are many who want to mix about and make new friends, but they find it extremely hard to do so. In this article we will discuss how you can change yourself from bring an introvert to an extrovert. Introversion is a state when you are too shy to speak your mind off, to almost anyone new. You tend to find it difficult speaking to new people at work and it becomes tougher when it comes to making new friends. And it ??becomes almost impossible, when it comes to hitting on this cutie who has been checking you out for a while. Sometimes it is good to be quite, but over a period of times it tends to get frustrating. For such people, life becomes like a compromise that they have to take each time they feel like opening up themselves in public. Often people tend to take introverts for granted, assuming that they're too innocent to react. Sometimes introverts are also misunderstood to be proud. What you got to understand is that being an introvert is only a state of mind, it is not something that you cannot change. The easiest way to overcome this fear is to face it. The more you go out and the most people you meet, the more you will get used to having them around you. You will feel more confident around people then. You will also learn some new tips how to interact with people. The next step is to make serious attempts to make new friends. Unless you try, you will never be able to do it. It doesn't matter if you go wrong a couple of times. What matters is that you seriously try. Join clubs and social networking sites, attend more parties and social events, talk to your colleagues, neighbors, etc. Even if you are way too nervous and don't know what to say, just smile. A smiling face shows confidence, even when you're not. Last but not the least, tell your subconscious mind to shut up. Just follow your heart and speak your mind. There is nothing to fear. Just remember, nothing is impossible. If your shyness took over you and made you an introvert, it won't take time for your boldness to take over your shyness and make you an extrovert as well. You can do anything you want, only if you believe. And becoming an extrovert is definitely no rocket science. Introvert To Extrovert by Cmohatta in Self Help / Stress Management (submitted 2011-03-30) Not everyone is an introvert by choice. There are many who want to mix about and make new friends, but they find it extremely hard to do so. In this article we will discuss how you can change yourself from bring an introvert to an extrovert. Introversion is a state when you are too shy to speak your mind off, to almost anyone new. You tend to find it difficult speaking to new people at work and it becomes tougher when it comes to making new friends. And it becomes almost impossible, when it comes to hitting on this cutie who has been checking you out for a while. Sometimes it is good to be quite, but over a period of times it tends to get frustrating. For such people, life becomes like a compromise that they have to take each time they feel like opening up themselves in public. Often people tend to take introverts for granted, assuming that they're too innocent to react. Sometimes introverts are also misunderstood to be proud. What you got to understand is that being an introvert is only a state of mind, it is not something that you cannot change. The easiest way to overcome this fear is to face it. The more you go out and the most people you meet, the more you will get used to having them around you. You will feel more confident around people then. You will also learn some new tips how to interact with people. The next step is to make serious attempts to make new friends. Unless you try, you will never be able to do it. It doesn't matter if you go wrong a couple of times. What matters is that you seriously try. Join clubs and social networking sites, attend more parties and social events, talk to your colleagues, neighbors, etc. Even if you are way too nervous and don't know what to say, just smile. A smiling face shows confidence, even when you're not. Last but not the least, tell your subconscious mind to shut up. Just follow your heart and speak your mind. There is nothing to fear. Just remember, nothing is impossible. If your shyness took over you and made you an introvert, it won't take time for your boldness to take over your shyness and make you an extrovert as well. You can do anything you want, only if you believe. And becoming an extrovert is definitely no rocket science. Two children arrive late at a birthday party. One of them looks at the large, noisy crowd inside and feels a surge of energy - a rush to just jump in and join in the fun. The other child is hesitant and searches for a friend. Seeing the crowd doesn't fill the child with energy; instead, the child's focus is on thinking about whom to approach and what to do next. What's the difference between the two? At first glance, it may seem one of them is SOCIABLE while the other is overly SHY. The 'sociable' kid (also called the extrovert) and the 'shy' one (the introvert) actually represent two dichotomies of human preferences. Unfortunately, because of society's very narrow vision, extroversion is usually perceived (wrongly) as a more 'positive trait' and introversion a more negative way to be. Understanding Extroverts And Introverts Every individual has a preferred style of interacting with the world - by turning their attention outward (extroversion) or focussing their attention inward (introversion). Most people believe that an extrovert is a person who is friendly and outgoing. While that may be true, that is not the true meaning of extroversion. Basically, an extrovert is a person who is energised by being around other people - the outer world. The opposite is true of an introvert, who is energised by being alone - in the inner world. For some of us, extroversion is 'home base' - activities such as speaking or socialising come more naturally. For introverts, activities such as listening or writing come more easily. The extroverts find introverted activities such as writing draining. For introverts, doing extroverted activities such as attending social gatherings is exhausting. In other words, each of us has our own gravitational pull towards either extroversion or introversion - a preference we are usually born with. How To Recognise Your Child's Preference Or Style Children start showing a preference for extroversion or introversion very early in life. You may not get to choose your child's preference, but you can help them understand their style and what they need. What do extroverted children like to do? "My daughter just won't stop talking; from the minute I reach home she's all over me!" - Mother of an extrovert Extroverts: • Tend to share thoughts or feelings immediately. • Ask lots of questions and need an immediate response. • Need people and activity to feel energised. A day alone leaves them feeling drained and cranky. • Rarely play alone; usually grumble that they are 'bored'. • Get into trouble for talking too much or interrupting. • Dislike being alone when upset. Will follow you around, touch you, and move right into your space. What do introverted children like to do? "I thought he was ignoring me. I didn't realise he was thinking!" - The mother of an introvert Introverts: • Share thoughts and feelings selectively, often only with parents, siblings or one friend but rarely with strangers. • Feel grumpy and drained after being in a large group. • Start talking in the evening after having time to reflect. • Have a strong sense of personal space and do not like to feel invaded. • Are often told to 'hurry up'. • Are not much into kiddie parties or having friends over at home. Clearing The Myths Of Introversion Myth 1: Introverts Are Unfriendly: This is probably THE biggest misconception about introverts. Introverts are energised by their inside world. Being with people drains them and is not their natural preference - but they are warm, compassionate people who are well aware of their own and others' feelings. They usually make very good friends, but may be close to only a select few. Myth 2: Introverts Have Self Esteem Issues: Not at all. Unfortunately, society's assumption is that those who are 'outgoing' have high self esteem. Introverted kids usually have no self esteem issues unless they are told by well-meaning family and friends that they have low confidence simply because they have fewer friends. Hearing that will undoubtedly lead to low self esteem in anyone! Myth 3: Introverts Will Never Succeed In Life Since They Don't Get Along With Others: Success in life doesn't just depend on one's social skills. Introverts are successful in any number of fields which call for use of their own special gifts. Myth 4: Introverted Children Are Aloof: Introverts are not rejecting you when they are quiet. They are thinking and recharging. They need time for reflection and inward thought. Myth 5: Introverts Need To Be Pushed To Do Things: Introverts are naturally contained and unhurried. Introverted children who are constantly told to do things quickly because they are wasting time feel pressured and then make mistakes. Parents (usually the extroverted ones!) need to understand how damaging it is to expect your introverted child to 'turn into' an extrovert. This puts an impossible burden on an introverted child and does much to destroy their sense of self worth. Encouraging And Understanding Your Child's Special Gifts As a parent, you can do a lot to encourage your child's preferences. Instead of pushing your extroverted son to do things alone, or compelling your introverted daughter to attend more parties, allow them to flower into what they will naturally become. If your child prefers extroversion: 1. Enrol them in more extra-curricular activities. 2. Recognise that they are drained by too much time alone. 3. Allow them to speak without restraint. 4. Be patient with their questions. 5. Praise them for their natural ability to make friends. 6. Understand that they prefer to be read to and dislike too much writing. If your child prefers introversion: 1. Honour their need for space, reflection time and observation. After a hectic school day, they may just want to go into their room and be alone. 2. Recognise that they are drained by large groups and interaction. Don't push them towards parties or joining clubs. 3. Be patient with their 'slowness'. When allowed to do things at their own pace, introverts usually perform better. 4. Prepare them for 'public appearances' by teaching them simple manners and social skills. These are usually difficult areas for an introvert. 5. Praise them for their observation skills. 6. Understand that they learn best by watching or reading. As the popular saying goes - 'find yourself and be yourself.' Allow your child to be what he naturally is and watch him soar! Are you the wallflower type who would like to be the life of the party, if only for one night? Perhaps you have good social skills, but you want to stand out more in the crowd. Here is a guide for the introvert who wants to work a room by with ease and charisma. Starting conversation The first step when an introvert arrives at a party is to tell herself or himself: Whatever happens tonight is all in good fun. And if I screw up, I'll simply forgive myself and keep on moving. Thinking of the party as a game, or a weird dream, or fodder for an interesting short story may also help. When you arrive at the party scan the room and observe what you see. Who catches your eye? With whom might you have something in common? Make a mental note of the people you would like to speak with by the end of the night, and make an effort to speak to all of them. It doesn't matter whether you do or don't, only that you have a loose game plan to go by. You might want to start with the fellow staring down at his shoes at the buffet table, he's probably an introvert too. The best way to break the ice is to talk about the one thing you definitely have in common - being at the same party. You can start things off by saying "I can't believe the decorations in this place. [the hostess] really went the whole nine yards" or "...so what do you think about the corn fritters? Pretty good, or have you had better?" or even "I knew [the hostess] was a people magnet but I still can't believe it. Look at this crowd!" Incidentally, complimenting the hostess, the party, the food or the decorations is always a good opener or segue during a lull in conversation. Leave the weather and sports small talk for the office watercooler. Getting in the Mix Introvert's Guide to Network Marketing Success by Serena Tan in Business / MLM (submitted 2006-12-29) Does the idea of selling scare you? Are you annoyed when you receive calls from complete strangers trying to interest you in the latest ground floor product or business opportunity? So do I. That's because you and I belong to the 85% of the population who hate being sold to. And if we hate being sold to, why would we want to inflict it on others by becoming network marketers ourselves? After all, the very crux of network marketing is sales, isn't it? Not if you believe network marketing expert Michael Dlouhy. He is a 26-year industry veteran who has made it his business to spread the message that network marketing is NOT about sales. What is network marketing about if not sales? Apparently, it's about people. I bet you have never heard any network marketing company tell you this. What they probably told you was that the big money was to be found in recruitment (the business opportunity) rather than sales of the products, how to put together your list of 100 names, and how the compensation plan would help you make money fast. That puts us introverts in rather a tight spot, because we don't like selling, and we don't want to risk rejection or jeopardizing friendships to make money. The result is that after maybe 6-12 months, we find ourselves with dwindling leads, few sales and even fewer downlines. No wonder we think network marketing is best reserved for the extroverts and natural salespersons. The key here is self-understanding, knowing what works for you as an introvert, and then using that knowledge to market your products and business opportunity differently. You don't have to force yourself to put on a false front to succeed in network marketing. No one is going to be convinced anyway, and you are just giving yourself unnecessary pressure. In other words, if you are an introvert, don't try to operate like an extrovert. It's not you, and your prospects will know it. What you need to do is to turn your personality into a business advantage. To do this, you need to know your strengths, find your own comfort level and work from there. For example, I am highly uncomfortable opening up in a group environment. My strength lies in one-on-one conversations. Going one-on-one puts me at ease and allows me to give my full attention to the person I am with. When I am at ease, the pressure is off and that puts me in a relaxed and confident frame of mind, just what I need to build a good relationship. Work from your natural strengths, and you can market more successfully. It won't feel like selling (if that's what is holding you back). Your focus would instead be on the person you are sharing your product or business opportunity with, and how you can help him meet his needs. That's a win-win for both of you. What if your preference is not to have any face-to-face contact? Can network marketing still work for you? Yes, if you use the right Internet marketing techniques. The Internet has such a wide reach that you can potentially reach thousands of people seeking your product or business opportunity - if you know how to find them. Again, remember that different marketing techniques work for different situations. Experiment until you find what works best for you. Here are some suggestions on how to get started in marketing your business online. First, you need to ask yourself who you are trying to reach. Are your prospects extroverts or introverts? According to research, introverts make up 25-40% of the population. That's a sizeable percentage. Make sure your marketing efforts contain something for everyone. For introverted prospects, their preference (like yours and mine) would probably be an arm's-length approach that gives them time to think and consider their response and get back to you when they are ready. Asynchronous methods like emails, ebooks, information DVDs and CD-ROMs would work well. Your extroverted prospects, on the other hand, would respond well to phone calls, tele-seminars and the standard excitable sales letter peppered with action words in caps, bold and highlighted yellow that tell them to whip out their credit cards and take action NOW. Secondly, whatever your prospect's personality type, there is one thing you can do that is practically guaranteed to attract prospects to you without you having to chase them down. It is the content of your website. Put together a site with a professional look and feel and fill it with pages of high quality content that provide just what people are looking for on the Internet, and you will see your site rankings rise and enjoy an increasing number of hits. If you do it right by working with (rather than against) your personality, don't be surprised if some of these visitors eventually become your customers or downlines. The bottom line is: just because you are an introvert doesn't mean you can't do network marketing or sales. You just need to find your own unique way of doing it. Be comfortable and natural in the way you reach out, and you will attract success more easily. As Jacques Werth, president of High Probability Selling, a sales training company in Media, Pennsylvania, testifies: "Many of our most successful graduates, some of whom earn high-six-figure incomes, are introverts," he says. "I'm an introvert, and I have had a highly successful sales career for almost 50 years." Jean Arthur was that rare commodity - an actress who shunned the limelight. She was reputed to be more reclusive than Garbo and so is often overlooked in descriptions of the Golden Age of Hollywood, but she gave memorable performances in a significant number of high quality movies ranging from 'The Whole Town's Talking' in 1935 to 'Shane' in 1953. She originally made her name as a comedienne in comedies like 'Mr. Deeds Goes to Town' for which her distinctive voice was ideal but her acting ability was such that she was also a leading contender for the coveted role of Scarlett O'Hara in Gone with the Wind (1939). She was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Actress in 1944 for her performance in 'The More the Merrier'. Teenager Jean, still a brunette One Bleach Bottle Later Learn One of The Secrets to Increased Motivation and Personal Development by gregory burrus in Self Help (submitted 2010-04-21) It has been long known that self-improvement has always been the crucial facet when it comes to succeeding in a competitive marketplace. The marketplace as we know it leaves little room for failure as in those who are not able to pull their own weight. A lot of times this is because of a self image developed long before one came to the business world. Because you work online, you still need to develop a better self improvement program so your online business becomes a success. When it comes to business, often times the success you seek is sitting and waiting for you in some program that others have used. Your goal is to take a step back, be a fly on the wall about your own self improvement situation. NLP or Neuro Linguistic programming is one of those programs. NLP is among the preferred tools of the personal development drive. NL provides a full suite of tools and strategies to help you become successful today. The Neuro Linguistic applications predict success merely because of its superior adaptability to the needs of the individual looking for personal development. For instance, for those with performance anxiety troubles, a great number of exercises will make an admitted introvert who is stuttering or has excessive sweating at the prospect of talking in front of a crowd; into a public extrovert who's sent into the crowd well on their way to speaking with much less fear. Now even though some may scoff at the idea, some of this may be done with meditation. For the individual hurting from extreme anxiousness the idea of meditation is well within the fabric of NLP and can rather often bring about astonishing results. While die hards may scoff at the thought of personal development merely because it's such a subjective exercise, it's noteworthy to note the extremely famous and successful individuals that swear by it and attribute their business success to examples, and exercises learned and tried during a personal development seminar. Maybe the most crucial facet to remember when talking about NLP personal development is the fact that it seeks to take advantage of a person's already built in strengths and weaknesses and just exploit the good and remove the weaker ones. When your success is mandatory now and your intention is to succeed in business, be valuable, and further your role as a leader in your business, just know that increased motivation may come from learning and researching NLP today. Managing Diverse Teams: Introverts and Extroverts by Terra Pugh in Business / Management (submitted 2010-08-09) Humans are particularly interesting creatures. We're extremely self involved, rarely have any perspective on our behavioral triggers, and really don't have a clue as to the "why" of what we do. Now, we're not bad creatures. We just have a lot to learn about ourselves. Case in point: What do you get if you throw a human into a herd of horses? Dust. Lots and lots of dust. (Note: You get dust from horses chaotically running around in a corral.) Now what do you get when you throw an unseasoned manager into the middle of an already established team/workflow? Dust. Lots and lots of dust. In general, the human race is goal oriented and rarely is able to put together a process of getting from point A to point B without a certain measure of trial and error. Typically, those of us that are direct line think: "Point A to Point B. A=B, now." Life doesn't necessarily work that way, especially when we're trying to get another living creature to do something for us. We need to have an idea as to how they think and what makes them tick. Enter extroversion and introversion. Typically, extroversion (also extraversion) is defined as: "the act, state or habit of being predominantly concerned with obtaining gratification from what is outside the self. Conversely, introversion is defined as: "the state or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life. (Merriam-Webster Dictionary) However, for the sake of this post, let's forgo the traditional definitions for a different set. Let's define extroversion as being physically active and introversion as being mentally active. Using this definition, extroverts will typically be more active and on the move. This can mean that they are moving their feet or moving their mouth. These are the socialites that thrive on conversation and human interaction. They've always got to be doing something or in the middle of something (to the point that they almost can't help themselves). The key with extroverts? Their "feet" wind up their brain (think of a wind up toy). On the other hand, introverts will typically be less active, quieter, and much more pensive. Their movements tend to be slower, more thought out, and you cannot rush them. They'll spend a lot of time thinking their way into things. You'll find introverts in computer science, accounting and in fields that are heavy in thought and have little human interaction. It's not that they don't interact, it's just that they are wired a little differently in their interactions and in what they are drawn to. The key with introverts? Their "mind" winds up their feet (again think of the wind up toy). Of course there are hybrids, introverts with an extrovert tendency in them. The secret in managing all of this is to know what you have in front of you at the moment. An extrovert will need to do something and move toward a goal whereas an introvert will need something that will mentally challenge them. So, back to the previous question. What do you get when you throw a manager into an already established team/workflow? The answer depends on the manager. Adjust to fit the situation and the personality in front of you and you'll find that you're apt to create less dust. At least, that's my take on it. Marketing to Children by John in Education (submitted 2007-12-17) The Ethics of Marketing to Children Are you a spirited extrovert? Since toddlerhood I have been bursting with energy and always on the prowl for new stimuli. My parents had trouble understanding my abilities to remain awake for 18 hours every day with no signs of tiring. I just never wanted to miss a beat. Well here we are 40 years later and have never taken the time to mellow out. Since the internet began to take form in the late 90's my interest has been in search engine advertising and publishing websites that kids like. Many marketers research websites for children, but few have been or are spirited extroverts themselves. At the turn of the millennium I began to realize that search engines and website research can pave the way for pinpoint targeted search engine marketing to children. After determining the role that search engine data had to help organize the setting of websites I set up my first kids research website in 2002. Why kids research, aren't there threats to children from online marketing? It's no secret our children are the future. Many marketing communications companies such as McDonald's, Hershey's marketing to children or Toys R us spend millions every year directed right at kids. "Mommy, can you buy me that for my birthday?" "Daddy I want that for Christmas" "Hey Mom can we go to McDonald's for dinner?" "I want that chocolate bar!" Sound familiar? This is no fluke that your kids want what they see. The way many kids products are advertised and packaged leaves very little room for interpretation. In less than 1 second a youngster sees it, likes it and finally wants it. Now mom and dad you are the target of the "nag Factor". Recent statistical surveys conducted suggest that children aged 12 to 17 years of age only need to say it 9 times (on average) before the parents cave and buy what they are asking for. When your son or daughter "says I want that"...you have actually been targeted by a marketing children pro. Promotion to children is a double edged sword. There is the ethics of marketing to children issue and threats to children from online marketing that is not as seen. How and Why of Communications to Children Each child in North America is exposed to roughly 100 TV commercials a day. If I set research in motion and dig what information I find about marketing to children is astonishing, but do I feel like I betray myself? The truth is research websites for children are a true blessing for parents. Here are a few resourceful sites for children that are filtered by humans to ensure integrity of suitable information. Ask Jeeves For Children http://www.ajkids.com/ Kids can ask a question and get and immediate answer Looksmart Children Directory http://search.netnanny.com/?pi=nnh3&ch=kids More that 20,000 websites organized in a directory for children Yahooligans http://www.yahooligans.com/ Started in 1999 it is designed for kids in the age bracket of 7 to 12. KidsClick! http://www.kidsclick.org/ Over 5,000 kids related site compiled by librarians. If I think back to my teenage days the closest information source I had was the school or public library. Children today have a wealth of information at their fingertips with a research website for kids of choice. Listen-up mom and dad...the trade off for hours of engaged internet activities is "daddy I want that dolly" or "can you buy me an Xbox mom, all my friends have one and I really, really want one...please?". I am telling you first handed research websites for children are aimed at EXACTLY what I have told you above. enticing your children to say any of the above magic phrases is why Free kid friendly sites have such a high conversion rate. On research websites for kids search engine marketing is studied carefully. Appealing to and irregular child, intense kids, excited kids, sensitive kids, analytical kids, a persistent child, an introverted child, spirited children or an intense child has all been researched well. Behavioral studies allow website administers to hone their campaigns so that more and more children start nagging "I want that..." Mom and dad, I am just letting you know what's up here with marketing to children. Many of the research sites for children are well researched with sound search engine marketing strategies that are aimed at getting in your kid's mind. Although you feel comfort in "kid's safe" websites, he, he,he...it could translate to persistent kids nagging you into purchase after purchase. Finally, I'll leave you with a few facts on marketing to children. 1) Children today are suffering form obesity. This is a result of Junk food (McDonald's), extensive TV viewing hours each day and home video games such as Xbox. 2) When a child nags their parents for a gift they are 55% successful. 3) About 1./2 of children surveyed claimed that when they nag and the parent(s) cave in and buy the desired gift it improves their sense of well-being Any statistics quoted in this article were obtained form the following websites http://www.newdream.org/kids/facts.php http://www.media-awareness.ca/english/parents/marketing/marketers_target_kids.cfm http://www.kff.org/ Marketing to Introverts: Seven Marketing Pitches That Leave Introverts Cold by Marcia Yudkin in Marketing (submitted 2009-12-15) According to Dr. Marti Olsen Laney, introverts make up roughly 25% of the population. Yet when you look at high-IQ people and high earners, the percentage is far higher. So if you hope to capture the attention and patronage of introverts, it's vital to downplay or avoid marketing tactics that don't influence them to buy - or send them running in the opposite direction. Unlike extroverts, who thrive on social interaction, introverts recharge their batteries by being alone. They tend to be more private, quiet and to-the-point than extroverts. Here are seven types of marketing pitches that are common in Internet marketing - and elsewhere - that leave introverts cold. 1. Earnings brags. Screen shots of earnings as they appear in a shopping cart program or merchant account report are pervasive in Internet marketing promotions. Some proponents of this tactic claim that this is the only way to prove that the seller is as successful as he says. Introverts aren't swayed by such "proof," however, because someone who shows exactly how much money they made is utterly unlike them. To the introvert, what such a person made doesn't indicate how much they themselves might make. The introvert is far more likely to take an interest in customer testimonials from people who sound like themselves. 2. Name dropping. Introverts make decisions on substance, not on who knows who, so referring constantly to big-name people as your friends doesn't influence them at all. Likewise, some speakers boast that they "shared the stage with so-and-so," but to an introvert that is no credential - not even a weak one. Trotting out the names of famous clients and sharing things they said is considerably worse, because it gets introverts thinking that you do not respect confidences. 3. Numbers served or sold. A bio in a direct mail piece I received yesterday starts off: "Dr. XXX currently owns and operates a clinic in YYY with over 20,000 patients." To an introvert, this fails to impress at all. Who wants to be one of 20,000? Introverts dislike being part of a herd, following the crowd or being treated as a number. If this bio said instead that Dr. XXX deliberately keeps his practice small, so he can give each patient personal attention, and that there's a waiting list of several months to see him, that would make him far more interesting to the introvert. 4. Saying large is small. "We're limiting this seminar to just 150 people, so act fast," said one promotion I heard recently, but to an introvert that statement is totally absurd. A room containing 150 people is a crowd, not by any stretch of the introvert's imagination an intimate event. To the introvert, any group larger than about 12 is no longer small. It's fine to run large events. Just don't call them small! 5. Pressure to decide fast. Introverts have certainly been known to make impulse buys, but since they pride themselves on thinking things through, they resent and reject pressure to make up their mind before they're ready. Introverts generally want a lot of information before pressing the "buy" button, and if you use a countdown clock saying there's only XX minutes or hours until the offer goes away forever, they're gone instantly, never to return. 6. Talking head videos. Since introverts usually love to read and can read quickly, they feel tortured when a web site conveys crucial information in a video that could have been conveyed in text. They don't hate the video medium in itself, only when it seems to be used out of laziness or self-aggrandizement rather than to show something that couldn't be as easily communicated any other way. 7. Too much personal information. Introverts prefer you to get to the point. Therefore, when you go on and on and on about your spouse, kids, pets, vacation or new yacht they tune out. If you want introverts as clients, beware of revealing facts that may reflect badly on you, even if you believe you've cast them in a positive light. For example, you may think discussing having gone bankrupt makes your current success more impressive. The introvert may not be able to get past your confessing this failure so blithely, since this is something they'd never abide others knowing about themselves. For introverts, either minimize the personal revelations or segregate them in a section of a newsletter or web site they can skip. My own clients tend to be about 75 percent introverts, and this probably has to do with how easily introverts can identify that I'm someone like them whose success they can model. Take a look at the personality profile of your own customer base and how you market, and you may well find some eye-opening patterns. You may certainly decide to continue to turn off introverts, but do make that a conscious choice rather than a side effect of simply following popular marketing tactics. Meditation - The Key to a Happy Life by Saddhamala (Nancy Nicolazzo) in Spirituality / Meditation (submitted 2011-01-29) Psychologists, researchers, philosophers and religious leaders all have something to say about happiness. What is happiness? What are the factors that lead to happiness? Can we do something to feel happier? Happiness is defined as a state of mind or a feeling characterized by contentment, love, satisfaction, pleasure, or joy. Attributes that correlate with happiness include: relationships and social interaction, extroversion, marital status, employment, health, democratic freedom, optimism, endorphins released through physical exercise and eating chocolate, religious involvement, income and proximity to other happy people. Philosophers and religious thinkers often define happiness in terms of living a good life (being virtuous and engaging in behaviors that are informed by ethics). Researchers, schooled in psychology, describe three kinds of happiness: 1. pleasure (positive sensory experience), 2. engagement (involvement with one's family, work, romance and hobbies), and 3. meaning (using personal strengths to serve some larger end). According to research: 1. identical twins growing up in different families, prove that 50% of one's happiness depends on one's genes. 2. about 10% to 15% of a person's happiness is a result of various measurable life circumstances such as socio-economic status, marital status, health, income, and gender, and 3. the remaining 40% of one's happiness is a combination of unknown factors and the results of actions that individuals deliberately engage in to become happier - for example, extroverts are happiest in situations involving lots of human interaction and introverts are happiest when they have time for solitude, silence and simplicity. Although older Americans generally suffer with more health problems, they report fewer problems overall. Young adults are angrier, anxious, depressed, have financial problems, troubled relationships and career stress. Most telling of all are the results of a 2010 study by Matthew Killingsworth and Daniel Gilbert, from Harvard University, who polled 2200 subjects and received a quarter-million responses. Their research found that people are happier when they are concentrating on the present, than when they are daydreaming. Surveys by Gallup conclude that spiritually committed people are twice as likely to report being very happy. So what do the statistics and research tell us? Many of the factors leading to happiness: genetics, socio-economic status, marital status, health, income, and gender cannot be easily changed - but concentrating on the present moment is something we can all train ourselves to do through meditation. During meditation, we concentrate on the breath, and when we are distracted by thoughts, story lines and negativity, we continually bring our attention back to the here and now, back to the breath, back to the present moment. Training ourselves in meditation, then, is training on concentrating on the present moment, and therefore, training in being happy. Meditation is the key to a happy life. Miniature Pinscher Training: What to do with the Little Rascal Dogs by Alvin Alkerson in Family / Pets (submitted 2007-09-09) Not all Miniature Pinschers or Min Pins are categorically the same. There are energetic Min Pins and then there are placid Min Pins. There are extroverted Min Pins and then there are introverted Min Pins. There are serious Min Pins and then there are the seriously off-beat goof balls who cannot sit still for one stitch of proper miniature pinscher training. When it comes to miniature pinscher training, dog trainers are often at a loss on what to do with these little rascals. Some pet owners find this breed too tiny (or too cute) to be subjected to any form of training, which makes the dog more difficult to manage (if they can be managed at all) in the end. Some Min Pins even suffer from the Little Napoleon syndrome: a tyrannical behavioral problem that causes the dog to bark excessively, to attack people (or other dogs) even when unprovoked and to be physically destructive to any and all things in the house. If you are subjecting your dog (and yourself) to miniature pinscher training, you must first remember a few basic characteristics of your pet. Min Pins are energetic to a point of insanity. They are extremely athletic, agile and can move very quickly with its prancing gait. Its small size is in complete reciprocal to its fearless spirit; some first time Min Pins handlers even find the dog a bit too assertive or feisty. This is a breed that will definitely not spend most of its time snoozing placidly on your lap. In fact, you can consider yourself extremely blessed if your dog manages to sit still for one whole minute during training. Also, the Min Pins are inquisitive animals, literally poking their noses into trouble. On the other hand, they make excellent watchdogs because they are alert, sensitive to their surroundings and bear residues of being territorial. In miniature pinscher training, pet owners must provide their pets enough physical activity and mental stimulation; not to mention enough space to run around. These dogs need to expend their energy in some constructive manner. They are notorious for destroying anything when they become bored or agitated. They also become increasingly noisy and often fall into excessive barking. Miniature pinscher training may take the form of obedience classes or agility classes. Desensitization is also part of miniature pinscher training. Min Pins are generally suspicious in nature, which makes them excellent watch dogs in their own way. Unfortunately, this trait may also translate to aggressive displays towards people and animals. In fact, this dynamo is even known to run after its perceived "enemy" because its chasing instincts are still very strong - a drawback to its ancestors who were bred to chase after vermin in the fields of Germany. This chasing instinct may also work in reverse manner. When the Min Pins feel threatened or bored or simply naughty, they will make you chase them for hours on end. These dogs are extremely sharp-witted and all your attempts to pacify it will be in vain. Unless, controlled early on, the Min Pins will react with aggression towards any unfamiliar stimuli in its environment. That is why it is essential desensitization in miniature pinscher training is essential. My Personality Says NO To Traditional Network Marketing by Carl Coffin in Home / Home Business (submitted 2008-05-06) I'm an Introvert. I have learned to be more extroverted, but I'm still an Introvert at heart. I don't feel comfortable going to live events and being around a bunch of people I don't know. I don't feel comfortable cold calling prospects, handing out DVD's, CD's, or Magazines in my local community. I also don't feel comfortable sharing my business opportunity with my friends, family, and neighbors because I'm always wondering what they think of me. My personality says NO to traditional network marketing. I have tried for years to change my personality to no avail. I've gotten better, but I still have this desire to stay in my shell. I would rather sit in my office and market online and have a system close my prospects and do all the work for me. I get this funny feeling in my stomach when I know I need to personally call my prospects. I would rather not call anyone, but have money flood into my bank account every month without speaking to a soul. My personality says NO to traditional network marketing. Does this mean that I'm in the wrong business? In my opinion the answer is NO. There is a place for me in this industry. I heard a trainer say that Introverts make the best salesman because they are good listeners. They are also good at emphathizing with prospects. I know this is just one man's opinion but I feel that listening and emphathizing with people are natural talents for me. My major point in this article is to share that if you are Introverted there is a place for you in this industry. If you are afraid to open up and network, one of the best things to do is to read personal development books. Personal development helps change your self-concept. If we have a better self image of ourselves we won't care what others think of us. When you get to that point my friends, you will be unstoppable. Once your self image is rock solid, all it comes down to is learning sales and marketing techniques. If you learn how to sell yourself to your prospects as a mentor who can can lead them to success, and drive massive amounts of traffic through marketing to your offers you can have massive amounts of cash stuffed in your bank account each month. Internet network marketing is perfect for Introverts The awesome thing about Internet network marketing is there are so many free ways to generate prospects. There are also many paid ways. The key is to believe in yourself and know that any skill can be learned. No one was a master copywriter in one day, they had to learn as well. This is the same with building websites, marketing funnels, etc. Take care my friends, and know that the power is within you. If you would like to learn more about me and how your business can benefit from an online marketing system, check out my resources below. Discover how to earn a whopping $4,567,09 per month in your spare time even if nobody joins your MLM business. Forget cold calling. Forget those home meetings. In fact, forget everything you've ever been taught about building a solid income in Network Marketing from the "gurus". Let this 25- yr "unknown" marketer show you how he built an organization of over 4,120 in 14 short months without making one phone call! ==> http://www.CarlCoffin.net - My Online Marketing System http://www.MLMTheLazyWay.net - My Personal Blog http://www.myspace.com/carlsmlmsecrets - Become my friend today!! Networking for Introverts by Sandra Zimmer in Other (submitted 2008-08-11) People who are introverts or highly sensitive have special abilities that are valuable in networking events, group meetings and social settings. However, they often try to imitate the aggressive networking styles of extroverts instead of developing methods more suitable to their own sensibilities. This often causes their sensitivity to work to their detriment. They end up feeling inadequate and squashed in the networking process. What introverts and highly sensitive people do best is to connect by receiving others. Here are some core concepts that you can use to make connection in a crowded room of strangers if you are introverted in nature. 1. Reach out by receiving a€|#34; Instead of trying to move toward people, stand still and look around the room with soft eye contact. Look gently and kindly at people, seeking anyone who is able to look back at you. 2. Only connect with the people who respond to you. The people who are able to look back at you are the ones in the room you want to connect with. They are the only ones with whom it will feel good to connect. So smile and use your sensitivity to invite the connection. Either move toward the person or wait for him/her to move to you. 3. Listen and ask questions a€|#34; This is your strength. Be curious to find out about the person. Don't be afraid to ask obvious questions. 4. Tell your story only after listening for some time. Especially when talking with an extrovert, you must wait and let them talk first. After listening for while, you will intuitively sense what to say to that person. 5. Ask what kind of client they want you to send to them. Let them know you will keep their card and keep them in mind in the future. Follow-up your connection with an e-mail or phone call after the networking event. Let them know how much you enjoyed connecting with them and you look forward to seeing them at the next event. The people with whom you have connected this way are almost always good contacts for you. This approach uses the law of attraction to receive people who are on your wavelength. Give it a try and let me know what happens. Peculiarities of College Life: How to Find the Right Courses by Ket Ledford in Education (submitted 2010-04-08) A college student is relatively independent. This independence can be observed in many fields, for instance, college students live apart from their parents, they take up part-time jobs, choose their majors themselves, and choose the courses they consider right and necessary for them. However, sometimes it is rather difficult to choose a course before you try it. This article will offer you advice on the criteria for choice of your college courses. How to choose the courses that will meet your demands? * Read the catalogue description. This is brief idea of the course, but it is enough o form general opinion about it. * Pay attention to the professor's reputation. Ask your senior friends to comment on this or that professor. Compare the responses and make a decision. * Consider the syllabus for the course. Pay attention to the reading assigned to it; decide if you are able to read that amount of literature. * If writing is your weak point, pay special attention to the number of written papers necessary to pass the course. Do not let yourself be cowed down by the course syllabus, but do not take up the burden you will not be able to bear. * Also, you should take into account class participation required by this course especially if you are an introvert and do not like public speeches. If you are an extrovert and if you like to demonstrate your knowledge, you should take a class that requires active class participation. * Consider your background. Do you have necessary basic knowledge to take up this course? * If you have chosen a class but you discover that too many people have enrolled already, do not lose your heart. It is possible to attend several classes (if the professor and the size of the room permit you) to see if you want to continue or not. If you prove to yourself that the class is perfect, turn to the professor, maybe he/she will add you to the list. Perfect Match - Learning to Become More Introverted by allan in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2009-10-07) Are you currently in a relationship with your partner and perfect match and this person is very introverted and you are extroverted and you are trying to become more introverted? Are you currently looking to find your perfect match and you know you are very extroverted to the point of being obnoxious; yet the person whom you like and think is your perfect match is much more introverted than you and you want to be able to relate to this person and get his or her attention without being too overwhelming? In both scenarios, you need to realize that you are a wonderful person and you should never change yourself in order to make someone else happy, even if that person is your perfect match or at least you believe that he or she is your perfect match. We always should be striving for emotional maturity, but we need to find that balance and not lose the special treasure of our own unique self in the process. If you are an extroverted person, that is a great thing, but if you want to tone down some of those obnoxious tendencies in order to impress your introverted perfect match, you can start by trying to talk to some of your more introverted friends to see what makes them tick so that you can in turn begin the process of better relating to your introverted perfect match. If your introverted perfect match was asking you to change, that would not be right. This behavior modification should be all your choice in order for you to better relate to your perfect match. Introverted people have a tendency to hang back in a crowd and they do not like to go up to people that they don't know and to initiate a conversation. So, how do you handle that type of situation when your perfect match is introverted and you are not? One thing you need to work on is understanding. You need to understand your perfect match and that he or she is definitely different than you in regard to those introverted qualities; even though you are your perfect match are different, that does not make either of you wrong. You both just need to learn to work together to find a common ground. So, how do you, as an extroverted person find common ground with your perfect match, who is an introverted person? You need to meet your perfect match on middle ground. Tone down your behavior and don't be so high energy and allow yourself to move more into the low-key level where your perfect match is. Accept your differences and know that finding that common ground with your perfect match will not always be easy, but if you truly like this person and think he or she is your perfect match, then you need to work hard to mesh your personalities together into some semblance of commonality so that you and your perfect match can have a mature dating relationship with long-term potential. Sales Training - Can the Introvert Salespeople Find Happy Hour Bliss? by Patricia Weber in Business / Sales (submitted 2008-11-11) Some history claims that the first happy hour was held in a local pub in Ireland. Others attribute that this before dinner reduced price drinks event started in the 1920???s as the Navy???s slang for its on-ship entertainment. Regardless what is true, introverts and extroverts would design a Happy Hour quite differently. Happy Hour mood music. Introvert ??? If we have to have music, nothing more than soft playing music in the background. I want to hear both others and myself talk. Extrovert ??? Crank up the tunes. Loud and up beat music will get things stirring. Happy Hour lighting. Introvert ??? When I???m talking, I prefer we can see each other. Real connections mean real conversation. Extrovert ??? Let???s have the lights dimmed or turned up. Either way, I???m there for the conversation; as much conversation as I can have. Happy Hour networking. Introvert ??? Have the sidelines around the bar marked so I can stand and observe for a time. I???ll need a little time to join in. Extroverts ??? Have happy feet on the floor pointing the way to the center of the action; that???s where I want to be from the get-go! I???ll dance into the middle of the action following the feet. Happy hour number of people. Introvert ??? I???m most comfortable in smaller groups. For me one is company and two can be a crowd. Maybe a group of two to twenty people max. Extrovert ??? If we???re going to be happy, we need lots of people. Crowds - all the people the space can hold is wonderful. Happy Hour title. Introvert ??? I???d be attracted to something like ???Friendship Hour,??? or ???Get Acquainted Hour.??? Extrovert ??? Any title with the word ???Happy??? or better yet, ???Party??? in it is for me. It???s the event I???m after and the happier the better. Happy Hour time of day. Introvert ??? As long as I plan to have some quiet time before and after, I can be fine at a Happy Hour gathering. If I???ve had a strong extroverting day, I won???t have the energy at the end of the day to last long. Extrovert ??? At the end of the day is perfect. Although starting the day off around a lot of people would be energizing too. Hey, what about a morning hour with espresso coffee? Happy hour with happy endings may have a different meaning for introvert and extrovert salespeople. Why is it critical for salespeople to recognize their preference? Because to enjoy any event like this, if you can prepare for it, very likely you will find yourself enjoying it and making connections for friends, clients and even connectors. Sales Training - Daily Recovery Important for Introverts by Patricia Weber in Business / Sales (submitted 2008-10-14) While autos can go a day or sometimes more before a fill up is required, introverts who sell will discover accelerated sales results with a daily routine centered on three areas: release techniques, comfortable marketing activities and targeting those activities to identified prospects. One area to fill up is your own beliefs about what success you want. Most of us, salespeople or not, have beliefs that hold us back from being all we want to be. We have an internal dialogue that is like a noisy clanking engine. Statements such as, ???I???m not worthy, It doesn???t matter that others are succeeding, I???m different,??? or any number of beliefs keep on ticking in our mind. You need to find a release technique to set your day up for success. Some most effective ones include the Sedona technique, Emotional Freedom Technique, meditation or even writing love letters. It doesn???t matter what technique you use. What matters is that you use one daily. Another fill up is to identify appropriate marketing activities. What???s appropriate? First, select a mix of activities that satisfy short, medium and long term sales goals, then act upon the ones that you enjoy - the ones that you are most comfortable with. Let???s say it???s the fourth quarter of the year and you are quite close to making your sales goal. The priority, the emphasis, would be on short term activities that get you the fastest results. This would include activities like: follow up with all prospects, contact all current clients to cross sell, and asking for referrals from clients. The fourth quarter is not the prime time to be using speaking engagements or article writing to attract new prospects quickly. When you need fast results, select and act on low hanging fruit sales actions. Whatever activities you select, start with activities you like the most to keep your attitude high. A third fill up activity is to constantly be defining your perfect client. Have you noticed when driving that if you take your eye of the road for just a second or two, you may tend to drift out of your lane? Well, when you take your thinking and talking about your perfect customer off in a different direction, you tend to drift away from your perfect clients. Part of your daily routine can include a fill up in your mind and talk about just who is your target client. The book, Attracting Perfect Customers, by Stacey Hall and Jan Brogniez, offers a strategic model for this. By achieving clarity on your perfect customer, wherever you are networking either in person or online, your message will be attractive to those you want to hear it. You won???t drift out of your lane. Extroverts tend to be energized by many activities going on at once, and a daily fill up may not be required, but extroverts would still benefit from a routine kind of attitudinal and marketing activity fill up. If your tendency in selling is more toward introversion, then the three fill ups ??? releasing negative beliefs, acting on desirable marketing activities and focusing on your target client ??? are more important to use on a daily basis. Sales Training - Introvert Salespeople Celebrate Speed Reduction Day to Rev Up Sales! by Patricia Weber in Business / Sales (submitted 2008-11-26) Just as Nixon enacted Auto Speed Reduction Day for energy conservation in 1973, introverts in business who sell may want to declare their own Sales Speed Reduction day for energy conservation. Extroverts, more like solar powered items, continually and speedily energize by doing things. Introverts, more like a flashlights, need to stop and replace actually batteries to keep on going. 1. Sales and marketing plans usually include a degree of networking. Be selective about the events you go to. As an INTJ in Myers Briggs types, I usually go early and speak with three to six people and then I'm free to either sit and eat, just wander around or leave. Selectivity and purposeful introductions are key to my success. 2. Schedule your days so any extroverting - speaking engagements, networking, even one to one meetings - can be done after you have some quiet time before and after. This allows you to pace yourself. In particular, you want any activity that restores and refreshes you. Selling can be enjoyable this way! 3. Email is a great way of communicating for introverts. You can control the conversation more easily. Don't hesitate to draft an introduction or follow up email and let it sit in draft mode. Then before you "speak" you've satisfied that innate need to think first. 4. Maximize your planning side to minimize crunch time. If you start preparing for a sales presentation or making a proposal well before the deadline, this lets you manage both time and energy. 5. Remember that introversion can look like shyness, but it isn't. Professor Bernardo Carducci of the Shyness Institute at Indiana University defines the difference this way: an introvert hangs around the edge of a social or business event to preserve their energy; a shy person is reluctant to join in because of the risk to be judged. 6. Understand yourself as an introvert. Since we need more time to restore our energy, select enough speed reduction activities to protect your energy. Hire a coach if necessary who understands the introvert's care. No one is solely introverted or extroverted. Being an introvert in sales doesn't mean there is something that needs to be fixed. There's nothing broken. We're in the perfect position as introverts to do more 'being' instead of 'doing.' The truth is even extroverts may find it stimulating to slow down on occasion. Sales Training - Introverts Top Four Strategies for Winning Sales by Patricia Weber in Business / Sales (submitted 2008-11-03) It was the 1938 Pimlico Race that Seabiscuit outraced Triple Crown winner War Admiral. Why? Experts say that Seabiscuit held with the pack and was trained to start from the gate with a burst of speed right from the starting bell. It???s important that as a salesperson you find your starting bell - that thing that gives you the jolt into your daily activities that creates the highest payoff each day. And just what are those daily jolt activities, in particular for the introvert, shy or reluctant who sell? Start each day in a way that will energize you in this extroverting activity of selling. This will be different for each of us. However, it is important in particular for introverts since the majority of our sales day will be a slow discharge of personal energy as we talk with prospects and customers. Energy can be physical, mental and emotional. Meditation, spending ten minutes reading something motivational, and even exercising before you start your workday can charge you up for the day. Remind yourself throughout the day you naturally have all the skills that customer???s crave. Be yourself: focus on the customer. Listen to them as you normally prefer to listen to people before you speak. One four year study by David Kurlan, The Modern Science of Salesperson Selection, published five major weaknesses in the April 1994 issue of Inc. Magazine in an article called ???Psyched Up or Psyched Out.??? One of the weaknesses, the tendency to become emotionally involved, affects listening skills to become more self-focused rather than prospect focused. Our distinct advantage as introverts is being able to maintain focus, hear important points and maintain control of a meeting. That???s one of several important skills that in innate in introverts. Remind yourself of this! Recharge throughout the day as needed to keep your optimism high. Over 30 years of research by Martin Seligman and his colleagues with more than one million salespeople have confirmed the importance of optimism in salespeople across several industries. It???s to a degree of being able to outsell from 20% to 40%. As introverts we tend to roll things over and over in our minds. Take time to think over positive affirmations. Find things to be grateful for. Stop, take a break, and recognize even the smallest sales task accomplishment. Listen to uplifting music to help sharpen this competitive advantage of optimism. End your day inside your head again with a focus on your inner game. A Harvard study which compared more than 60,000 sales people, concluded that one common success factor was the ability to manage the "Inner Game of Self Management." They not only know the rules, strategies and objectives, but they manage their inner game. It is like the horse racing around the track with action, sweat and yet simply running the race. Get some good training or coaching. Learn the rules, the strategies, set your goals and then take those end of day contemplated actions. In 1938, two hundred yards from the wire, Seabiscuit pulled away from his rival. He extended his lead in the horse race, finally winning by a clear four lengths. As long as you steadily increase sales, you have more than a horse???s three years to win the race of selling. What is going to be your starting bell? Plan your energized approach, practice optimism throughout the day, recharge regularly and focus on your inner game. Then race to the finish line of top salespeople. Sales Training - Top 35 Sales Tips Mostly for Introvert and Shy Salespeople by Patricia Weber in Business / Sales (submitted 2008-11-26) In 1998 I wrote my first book, Sales Skills for An Unfair Advantage: 104 Sales Tips for People in a Hurry. Sales professionals still seem to be in a hurry! With speed in mind and a focus being to help in particular, here are 35 tips to help introverts and shy to sell more easily. Sales professionals can start and use these either in the final days of the year, or anytime. In particular, these are for introverts with a few for shy and even the reluctant extrovert salespeople. 1. Take time and use your listening skills to build rapport and trust. 2. Make your interest in research your strength and take time to work in silence at planned times in the day. 3. Go with a friend to networking events so they can make introductions for you. 4. Rather than try to engage in small talk, ask open-ended questions when you are networking and then listen and learn. 5. To overcome shyness and avoid networking opportunities altogether, join a social group with friends to accustom yourself to the environment. 6. To manage your introversion when networking, take planned breaks to grab a drink or go to the restroom. 7. Boost your confidence and belief in yourself by reflecting on past successes in any endeavors before you engage in sales and marketing actions. 8. Take time to write a thoughtful thank you note after first meeting someone. 9. Stay focused on people who you meet by maintaining eye contact through 80% of your conversation and you will eliminate external distractions. 10. Take advantage of email to get your message just right. 11. To get known and become memorable, write articles for the internet as well as trade publications. 12. Take advantage of social online networking and set a goal for a comfortable number of networks and number of contacts you want to make. 13. Be more curious about how you can help others and become known as a connector. 14. Focus on and use your strengths of listening, planning and preparedness for all your sales and marketing. 15. Develop a sales and marketing plan that fits you instead of trying to follow some extrovert model. 16. Perfect your ability to shine in discussing bigger and deeper issues by scheduling follow-up meetings from networking events. 17. Learn to value yourself and what power you bring to a much wanted selling environment. 18. Pump up your composure and self-control to communicate self-confidence. 19. Get a massage to dissolve that tension carried in your muscles from any extended times of extroverting. 20. Stay true to your nature in networking and always leave a little early. 21. After any networking take time to get organized by making notes of people you met that you want to follow-up with. 22. Perfect for our planning nature: practice both a 30 second and 60 second version of the introductory elevator pitch. 23. Create a blog for marketing so you can build credibility while nurturing that introverting desire. 24. Bring to mind something that makes you smile often throughout the day to lighten up your thoughtful expression. 25. Make asking for referrals one of your top marketing activities since you value personal and deep relationships. 26. Work from the inside out and convince yourself first that you have a valuable product or service. 27. As your business grows, outsource some of the more extroverted activities and do what you do best. 28. Approach sales meetings with an agenda; written or spoken. 29. Keep a journal of successes along the way and refer to it often. 30. Schedule exercise or meditation into days that are going to be more extroverting than introverting. 31. Just take a step at a time and only build the social skills you believe you would most enjoy. 32. Find a coach or a mentor so that you can rely on these supporters to help you get out of your head. 33. Find the right sales organization which might be one that balances selling with a product or service that requires analyzing and problem solving. 34. Take advantage of follow-up meetings for breakfast or coffee since the structure is usually shorter than lunch. 35. Value yourself; you learned that in tip #17, because you bring power in ways much wanted by the buyers of today. All professional salespeople do introverting and extroverting all day long. It???s the nature of the selling process as you work toward the benefit of a prospect to go from research, to planning, to sales conversations and follow-up. In 1998 I wrote my first book, Sales Skills for An Unfair Advantage: 104 Sales Tips for People in a Hurry. Sales professionals still seem to be in a hurry! With speed in mind and a focus being to help in particular, here are 35 tips to help introverts and shy to sell more easily. Sales professionals can start and use these either in the final days of the year, or anytime. In particular, these are for introverts with a few for shy and even the reluctant extrovert salespeople. 1.?????? Take time and use your listening skills to build rapport and trust. 2.?????? Make your interest in research your strength and take time to work in silence at planned times in the day. 3.?????? Go with a friend to networking events so they can make introductions for you. 4.?????? Rather than try to engage in small talk, ask open-ended questions when you are networking and then listen and learn. 5.?????? To overcome shyness and avoid networking opportunities altogether, join a social group with friends to accustom yourself to the environment. 6.?????? To manage your introversion when networking, take planned breaks to grab a drink or go to the restroom. 7.?????? Boost your confidence and belief in yourself by reflecting on past successes in any endeavors before you engage in sales and marketing actions. 8.?????? Take time to write a thoughtful thank you note after first meeting someone. 9.?????? Stay focused on people who you meet by maintaining eye contact through 80% of your conversation and you will eliminate external distractions. 10.????Take advantage of email to get your message just right. Selling to Introverts: 10 Ways to Appeal to Introverts' Marketing Preferences by Marcia Yudkin in Marketing (submitted 2009-12-15) Whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, you probably have an unthinking tendency to market to people the way you yourself prefer to be communicated with and treated. If your target audience resembles you, that approach succeeds. But if your target audience differs greatly from you, you're shooting yourself in the foot when you do that. Worse, unless you've investigated or learned about the preferences of those with a different personality, you may not realize the extent of this disconnect. For best results, you must market to people the way they prefer to be marketed to, not the way you prefer to market or be marketed to. When you are selling to people who are reserved, quiet, comfortable with themselves, independent thinkers and not the life of the party - in other words, introverts - here are 10 important guidelines to keep in mind. 10 Ways to Sell Successfully to Introverts 1.Third-party credibility boosters. Introverts tend to be less gullible than extroverts, because they're less swayed by enthusiasm or the desire to follow the crowd. You want to win their respect, and they respect media coverage, awards, certifications, credentials and endorsements from industry leaders who are known as the most competent in their field. Any relatively objective indicator of excellence influences introverts to become more interested in what you offer. 2.Confidentiality. Introverts treasure privacy, and they retreat when they see that you might not keep their patronage of you private. Coaches and consultants who illustrate their points with examples from clients raise this suspicion, even if the clients are identified only by a first name. Likewise, offering feedback as part of a package but only in public can make introverts hang back. Explicit reassurances about confidentiality can be crucial to earn the trust of introverts. 3.Opportunity to ask questions before the sale. Because introverts are less likely to get swept along by the breathless enthusiasm of a sales pitch, they value the chance to contact the seller to clarify something that's important to their decision-making process. Saying there will be an opportunity to get questions answered after the sale helps, also. If the question-asking occurs in private rather than in a group setting, all the better. 4.No gratuitous videos. Don't force a prospective buyer to sit through a video in order to access introductory information about your product. Introverts enjoy watching videos for entertainment or for demonstrating how to do something, but when you deliver information on video that that could easily have been conveyed in text, they'll resent you for wasting their time. Forget about "talking head" videos for this group. 5.No fluff or filler. Introverts hate hype. They also dislike it when people don't get to the point. High-content communications with some promotion woven into it or appended at the end therefore go over best with introverts. 6.Samples. Because introverts prefer substance to fluff, they're more eager to buy when they've seen a sample that impresses them. So if you are selling a book, provide a free sample chapter; if you are selling a coaching program, make a sample session available, with the participant's permission noted. 7.No name dropping. Some marketers like to refer to colleagues as "my good friend (or buddy) so and so," but if you do that too many times, introverts may lose respect for you. They'd rather have fewer, closer friends, and they'll think you're blowing hot air when you claim to have close relationships with a lot of people. In addition, the mere fact that you know someone important doesn't raise your status even a millimeter with an introvert. 8.Personal attention. Introverts prefer to interact one-on-one or in small groups. They don't like crowds. So if you offer seminars, coaching, tours or workout facilities, do so on an intimate scale. You won't catch introverts yearning to cruise on a thousand-passenger ship, enjoying stadium-sized lectures or belonging to a crowded, cavernous gym if they have another choice. 9.Minimal pressure. If you sell overly aggressively and don't give an introvert time and space to think through their decision, they'll duck out and go elsewhere to buy. Deadlines are fine, but not ten minutes down the line. 10.Practice what you preach. Introverts value consistency. They're put off by a proofreading service that has a typo in its marketing copy, a purportedly "green" company that wastes paper or someone who says he's not selling something yet proceeds to do exactly that. Make sure you embody the principles you espouse in the way you promote your offerings and the way you treat customers. Above all, communicating in a calm, respectful, content-rich manner wins over introverts. Be prepared, be succinct, be substantive with them and you'll be successful. Some say I am introvert - others say I am extrovert by Shafi Farooq in Careers / Career Management (submitted 2009-09-20) Introvert? Extrovert? What the hell is the difference? Ain't we all humans? Ain't we all unique in our own way? My attitude towards others is well-balanced, very respectful of others and somewhat respected I might add. My performance at work is much better than average. I socialize at work as much as I need to during lunchtime and coffee breaks. However, when I sit in that cubicle, I work and I do a damn good job at that. What if I am an introvert When I first came to the States, I started working as a computer technician. I was told that I was too shy and I sat in that cubicle all day long, working and working. I would say to myself "I was hired to do a job. I was not hired to socialize. That comes after work when I leave that building." My manager even warned me to get out and mingle with others. It's good for your sanity. You are all cooped up in that 8x8 cubicle. You are an introvert. English not being my first language, that was the first time I ever heard that word. Obviously, I didn't know what it meant. As long as it didn't start with an "F", it didn't bother me that much. I told her, I said "I am not whatever you just called me. I am just as human as you are." Luckily, she didn't say anything and left it at that. Maybe she thought I was a dumb asshole and that's why she probably didn't say anything. My apologies to the dumb assholes of the world. I actually meant to say something else. I just slipped. I apologize again. So I did some research. Now I know what an introvert is. When there is an introvert, there has to be an extrovert. And when I understood what an extrovert was, I decided to become one. O! man, life is fun, ain't it? What if I am an extrovert Five or six years passed. During that time, I had converted to being a full-time extrovert. That became my faith. I started working for another company. I was so aggressive that some people, at work, complained I was stepping on their toes. I would say to them I am an extrovert. I am supposed to do that. If you get offended or your rights are violated, that's your problem. Those days I was so aggressive if someone wanted to go to hell, I would make sure that I was the first on that path. My manager warned me I was way over my head. She said people were offended, people were insulted. No one wanted to talk to me let alone socialize with me. What if I am an introvert/extrovert I was already out of the rat hole of being an introvert. I didn't want to become one again. A lot of people felt insulted by me. So I didn't want to be an extrovert either any more. I decided to be an introvert slash extrovert. I even had a sign labeled "Introvert/Extrovert" outside my cubicle to the right of my name plate. People started calling me int-ext. There were some who called me In tExt. I felt like an In Text Ads Network. O! ye human resources of the world I am not an introvert. I am not an extrovert. Let those fancy words be the vocabulary of the shrinks of the world. Don't label me any more, please! I want to be a hard worker. I want to be a smart worker. All I want to do, at the end of the day, is to put some food on the table. All I want to do is see some smile on my kids' face. Moral of the story If you are an introvert, get out of that rat hole. Mingle with others. Hear what other people have to say. Take interest in others and their work and interests. And be assertive. If you are an extrovert, tone it down. Will you, please? You are not the only one living on this beautiful planet of ours. Be assertive but not aggressive enough that people stop socializing with you. Just be mindful of others' feelings. You do your job and let others do theirs. Most of all, don't let the shrinks of the world label you anything. First and foremost, we are all hardworking people. We respect others. We don't ask others to respect us. But what we do ask is to not be insulted with this mumbo jumbo kind of talk that we don't even fully understand. Some tips to beat the loneliness during single traveller holidays by Ankita in Travel / Travel Tips (submitted 2011-07-09) Going on solo holidays is a rewarding experience. It does not matter whether the traveler is an extrovert or an introvert. But sometimes the single travellers feel the crunch of loneliness. Here are some tips for the solo travellers to avoid loneliness during solo holidays: 1. Before you proceed to contact your friends to find out whether they have any friends at the destination you are visiting and fix a date with them for a cup of coffee or drink. This will help you to avoid loneliness at the new place and your energy will also be charged. You will also know some little but essential things about your new destination. 2. Single travellers should always try to stay in a small guest house. In this way you will be able to socialize on your vacation. At small guest houses you will get more personal attention and you may be easily guided for the places you want to visit. 3. In the early days of your trip it is best to take a walking tour of the place because it gives single travellers a fair idea about the place. You can also take day trips to nearby places by bike. 4. Another great way to mix yourself with the local people and to learn about the culture of the place you are visiting is to learn to make their food by joining some cooking classes. Single travellers can use this newly acquired knowledge back home for impressing their friends by making foods of different places. 5. If you are interested in languages try your hand in learning the language of the place you visit. At least you can learn some common words most commonly used there. In this way you will not only enjoy your solo holidays but also increase your knowledge. 6. Local interaction is very important for holidays for singles. In many countries where people do not have English as their mother tongue they often want to practice English. Solo travellers can offer their expertise in English to them. You can meet the over coffee or drink. This will result in quick interaction with the local people and will mean more comfort for you during your holidays even if they are single holidays and you can beat the loneliness. 7. Remember you have to make your holidays thrilling and exiting even if they are solo holidays. So go to a busy restaurant crowded with couples and do not forget to take a decent book or magazine of your choice. Do not try to be very self conscious. Watch the people dining there and stare at them. Display your book or magazine prominently. Some people may come to you to talk and may even offer some comment for your book. 8. Solo travellers will do well by going to shows and theatres. During intermission they can talk with the neighbors in their row. In this way solo travellers can increase their acquaintances. The above tricks are easy to follow but will make the holidays for singles memorable and exiting. My name is Jody, and I am an Introvert. Sounds like a weird meeting for some off-beat support group right? If there were actually support groups for the 25% of the population who are Introverts, they would probably have few members, as us Introverts tend to shy away from social gatherings. In fact, we are drained by such events! Of course it is very difficult to avoid everyday noisy interaction, especially since even Introverts have to venture out into Extrovert territory sometimes. These occasions are usually referred to by Introverts as the 'Big Drain'. That is how I feel most days, because I am an Introvert living in a world created by, and for Extroverts. What exactly is an Introvert you may be wondering? Well to put it simply, we are the opposite of an Extrovert. Extroverts tend to draw their energy from interacting with people, and come alive at gatherings and parties with lots of people. Extroverts thrive on change and new experiences. They truly adore the hustle and bustle of modern life. They should, after all they created it! Humans are particularly interesting creatures. We are extremely self involved, rarely have any perspective on our behavioral triggers, and really don't have a clue as to the "why" of what we do. Now, we are not bad creatures. We just have a lot to learn about ourselves. Case in point: What do you get if you throw a human into a herd of horses? Dust. Lots and lots of dust. (Note: You get dust from horses chaotically running around in a corral.) Now what do you get when you throw an unseasoned manager into the middle of an already established team/workflow? Dust. Lots and lots of dust. In general, the human race is goal oriented and rarely is able to put together a process of getting from point A to point B without a certain measure of trial and error. Typically, those of us that are "direct line" think: "Point A to Point B. A=B, now." Life does not necessarily work that way, especially when one is trying to get another living creature to do something for us. We need to have an idea as to how they think and what makes them tick. Enter extroversion and introversion. Typically, extroversion (also extraversion) is defined as: "the act, state or habit of being predominantly concerned with obtaining gratification from what is outside the self. Conversely, introversion is defined as: "the state or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life. (Merriam-Webster Dictionary) However, for the sake of this post, let's forgo the traditional definitions for a different set. Let's define extroversion as being physically active and introversion as being mentally active. Using this definition, extroverts will typically be more active and on the move. This can mean that they are moving their feet or moving their mouth. These are the socialites that thrive on conversation and human interaction. They've always got to be doing something or in the middle of something (to the point that they almost can't help themselves). The key with extroverts? Their "feet" wind up their brain (think of a wind up toy). Examples: - Get them to walk to your desk when they need to talk to you. That way, their mind will be more engaged and settled by the time they get there. - If they are feeling creatively blocked, have them go for a walk or talk with other co-workers about what they are working on. The process will engage their brain and help them move beyond the brain block. On the other hand, introverts will typically be less active, quieter, and much more pensive. Their movements tend to be slower, more thought out, and you cannot rush them. They'll spend a lot of time thinking their way into things. You'll find introverts in computer science, accounting and in fields that are heavy in thought and have little human interaction. It's not that they don't interact, it's just that they are wired a little differently in their interactions and in what they are drawn to. The key with introverts? Their "mind" winds up their feet (again think of the wind up toy). Examples: - For complex problems, ask one question and leave them to solve it. It will take them some time, but they will come up with the right answer. - If they are overwhelmed, have them go work on their project in quiet, secluded area. When you do need to check in on them, do it from a distance. They'll come to you if they need help. Of course there are hybrids, introverts with an extrovert tendency in them. The secret in managing all of this is to know what you have in front of you at the moment. An extrovert will need to do something and move toward a goal whereas an introvert will need something that will mentally challenge them. So, back to the previous question. What do you get when you throw a manager into an already established team/workflow? The answer depends on the manager. Adjust to fit the situation and the personality in front of you and you'll find that you're apt to create less dust. At least, that's my take on it. The 5 Key Steps from Being an Introvert to Being an Extrovert by Nelson Berry in Self Help / Hypnosis (submitted 2011-03-29) Are you a self-confessed introvert? If so, you probably know the pros and cons of being one. Yes, it feels safe and peaceful to be by yourself. But there will be times when you can???t help but feel lonely and insecure and think about all the things, people, opportunities, and experiences you are missing out on. If you want to make a change in your life, here are 5 steps you should follow: 1. Change the way you think about yourself. Most introverts refuse to invite change into their personalities because they think they are born to be introverts and that???s who they really are. They think they can???t help but be introverts. But who you are is only what you think about yourself. If you think you are an introvert, then you will make decisions based on that belief. When someone invites you for a party out, you will choose to stay at home. When you???re in a crowd, you decide to stay in one corner and be by yourself instead of getting to know the people around you. Why? Your reason will be ???because I???m an introvert???, not knowing that you just became an introvert because you thought so. This shows that your actions and behavior are the results of your thoughts. So the first step is to change the way you think about yourself. There are two sides to this: ??? Think that you are an extrovert. ??? Believe that you are a very confident person so you are naturally likeable. 2. Focus on the benefits of extroversion. Instead of thinking about the benefits of introversion, focus on what being an extrovert can do in your life. Some people who think they are introverts have a negative perspective about extroverts. They tend to justify their introversion by saying that extroverts are noisy, rowdy, and aggressive people. That makes them feel safe and good as introverts. If you want to be an extrovert, you need to help your mind understand that desire. Tell your mind to look at the benefits of being an extrovert. That includes more time spent with the family, more friends, more acquaintances, more memories, more experiences, more support and encouragement, more laughter, and the list goes on. Extroverts are also able to speak their minds and give their opinions. Therefore, they don???t have to settle for situations that are not favorable to them. 3. Find a balance. No one is born without the need for social relationships or the occasional alone time. You are created to be a balanced individual, independent but also able to value relationships and interactions with others. There is a different kind of satisfaction and happiness found in being with others and a different kind found in being by yourself. You need both kinds to live a complete and happy life. 4. Let down your guard. For most introverts, however, the transformation is more challenging. Some introverts only became introverts because of three possible reasons: ??? They received negative feedback as extroverts. ??? They had a negative experience as extroverts. ??? Their introversion is part of their defensive instincts. If you really want to change, you have to make the decision to let down your guard and let people in. Now, that sounds hard. After all, can you really control your instinctive defense mechanisms or the thoughts that automatically enter your mind? 5. Reprogram your subconscious. The answer is, yes, you can! Your defense mechanisms and the thoughts that just randomly enter your mind without your meaning to all hide in your subconscious mind when not in use. If you want to control every thought that pops into your head or the instinctive feelings you have, you can reprogram them by sending subliminal messages into your subconscious. Here are some examples: I have the traits of a natural extrovert. I am confident and outgoing. I am at ease with other people. I feel comfortable in crowds. I enjoy social environments. I enjoy meeting and interacting with people. I value my relationships deeply. The Important Decisions to Consider when Choosing a Career to Pursue by Academiesbtia in Education / Online Education (submitted 2011-08-26) Higher education : When designing for choosing a career there are most vital choices to be created for a stronger future. Nowadays an individual will opt for any career path as they like. It's straightforward to become overwhelmed by the massive variety of career decisions offered in an exceedingly great amount of knowledge concerning these careers. Choice of the task depends upon the salary information and also the superficial factors like self-worth and income which is able to not give for a career satisfaction within the future basis. Interests : There ought to be interest in choosing the career. The interest are going to be emerged when the degree is chosen because the person like. Then the career are going to be a lot of helpful and successful with the required studies. Intro-vision Vs. Extroversion : Introverts would like longer to recharge and also the extroverts thrive on social interaction. Several peoples are terribly near the center of the spectrum and can be happy in an exceedingly career that balances the time with the social interaction. Natural talent and Abilities : Naturally there ought to be interest in all the topic that is to be thought of for a career and when the actual subject isn't well versed then it'll be an excellent deal. Most degree programs are together with a spread of categories which can be or might not be the long run path or career. Don't build yourself discouraged with the negatives within the unwanted subject and check out to encourage yourself for pursuing a best career. Goals and rewards : The career path are going to be happy once you get a lot of rewards within the work. Some folks need to assist the opposite folks directly however another people can look for independence and autonomy. All the persons are going to be derived fulfillment in an exceedingly totally different approach. however it's not the proper call of being attentive to the society's price rather than the own. it'll result in a wrong career alternative. All the persons can have a separate distinctive combination of interests, abilities, temperament traits and values. Deciding a best career isn't straightforward to most of the folks. once you analysis and introspection is completed it'll be a value with a lifetime of career satisfaction. For more details about Special Education log on to http://www.academies.com/ Academy does the legwork for you, offering a rundown of various degree offerings as well as valuable information on the professions that can be obtained by major. Now, students can find all of the information they need for finding an online school in one simple, easy to navigate, informational site. The Introverted Leader by Chris Hammer in Business (submitted 2011-01-07) I'm an introvert. And so are many other reasonably bright, well-rounded, effective individuals. So it's not a bad thing. But I do believe that to be most effective, the introverted leader should examine what this personality style can mean in the context of leadership - and know how to leverage it successfully. (And if you're more of an extroverted leader by nature, this is still worth paying attention to: to lead well you need to understand all types of personalities - including the introverts). What makes a person more introverted or extroverted? In simplified terms it's about how we process our information and how we 'recharge': the extrovert will often examine his thoughts out loud to others, whereas the introvert is more likely to spend more time alone making sense of his. The extrovert will seek out others as a source of stimulation and energy, and the introvert will be pushed to the edge of exhaustion if she's unable to take refuge in her own solitude. Introverts are typically more socially reserved than extroverts, and their presence can easily be missed in a roomful of people (this is not synonymous with 'shy', however - we're not necessarily shy as much as we are 'quiet and unassuming'). So, then, can an introvert really be an effective leader? Of course she can - but in a rather different way than how we're used to thinking about leaders: most of the politicians and other leaders we see in the public eye are extroverts. This is the type of leader we're used to because they're in front of us every day. They're charismatic, outgoing, and animated. They have a commanding presence. They're the 'people people'. But it's important for the introverted leader to refrain from trying to emulate the extrovert just because that's what others may expect. Developing stronger speaking skills and making the effort to connect with others in more dynamic ways, for instance, are important things to practice - but trying to be someone we're not is inauthentic. And nobody likes a phony. (Finding this balance can be a fine line sometimes, but we can always check in with ourselves with this simple question: "Am I trying to be someone I'm not, or am I genuinely trying to bring out the best of who I am and who I could be?") We all have the ability to stretch our personalities a little; to enlarge them enough to more effectively meet the world head-on, and to operate a little bit out of our comfort zones. The introvert can and should learn to present himself in more outgoing ways as the situation requires - but he should also understand that much of his effectiveness actually lies in his introversion: that his natural tendencies as an introvert also happen to be important leadership qualities. The introvert's innate leadership qualities are in his tendency to observe carefully and evaluate accurately before engaging a situation; in his habit of formulating his thoughts and planning his message before speaking; and in his ability to quickly cultivate quality relationships. So, yes, introverts can make great leaders - but they do need to stretch their boundaries in order to be heard in an extroverted world. And just as importantly, they need to recognize and embrace their 'gifts' rather than resent their 'shortcomings'. Time Management Tips For Extroverts - Build Productivity With A Quick Quiz Plus 3 Proven Strategies by Paula Eder in Self Help (submitted 2011-07-17) Time management tips are the ultimate energy tools if they fit your personality. Are you an extrovert or an introvert? The quiz that follows will help clarify what makes extroverts unique, as well as describe their singular gifts. If you are an extrovert, capitalize on your special strengths! You'll discover that you can create new paths to heightened productivity. To magnify your effectiveness, using these specialized tips. What are the Strengths of an Extrovert? If you are an extrovert, you carry the following advantages: 1) You possess a highly developed capacity to create social environments in which you thrive. In these settings, you cultivate strong professional relationships. 2) Extroverts utilize their sophisticated interpersonal talents to navigate through challenging situations in the world of work. Their genuine interest in others enables them to listen actively and with compassion. Extroverts can use their natural empathy and communication skills to gather data and negotiate effectively. Quiz: Are You an Extrovert? _____ T/F: I do best when I'm actively engaged, not passively learning. _____ T/F: I am energized by group collaborations. _____ T/F: I'm most creative when collaborating with others. If you answer these questions with "True", then the 3 tips in this article apply directly to you. Briefly stated, your extrovert strengths shine when you direct your energy towards engaging with others. As this fuels your energy, your stamina is superior in situations demanding intensive interactions. At the same time, you may find your effectiveness erodes when you work on your own. 3 Ways Extroverts Can Amplify Their Productivity Extrovert Tip #1: Use your interpersonal skills to build effective and highly cooperative teams. Support your more sociable co-workers as they work together and independently generate team approaches that allow each individual to excel. Also, identify which introverts you work with most easily, and delegate tasks to them that can be handled independently. Knowing that your perspective and keen perceptions feed your creativity, tune into spontaneous opportunities to strengthen your relationships with others. The more you can accurately map out each contributor's range of competence, the more inspired your guidance of "smart groups". Because your skills build confidence, you can direct others to create highly effective working systems. You and your colleagues may be amazed by how dramatically the synergy of such collaboration surpasses the sum of its individual parts. Extrovert Tip #2: Recognize and respect introverted coworkers, and capitalize on their unique strengths. Don't fall into the extrovert trap of discounting introverts. Instead, call on your intuitive social skills to respectfully draw them out. Make a note of how they add to group projects with their special strengths. Remember that introverts are not at their best when put on the spot. This is particularly true in stressful group situations. So, explore options to check in at agreed-upon intervals. You can rely on methods of communicating predominantly via text messaging, emails and meetings in quiet surroundings. Some introverts are quite comfortable preparing presentations for groups, given enough time to prepare. By working within each individual's comfort zone, everyone feels respected, data is collected, and no one feels stranded or engulfed. Extrovert Tip #3: Identify the tasks you find difficult or bothersome, and handle them first thing. Extroverts can find it tempting to socialize rather than attend to stressful tasks. But if you habitually seek out others for stimulation before attending to annoying project details, your final product may suffer. So overcome the urge to procrastinate. Start with the objectionable work and get it over with. Then you'll be free to make enjoyable and productive use of the rest of the day with clear conscience. So now, ask yourself: How can you capitalize on your extrovert strengths to supercharge your effectiveness? Humans are particularly interesting creatures. We're extremely self involved, rarely have any perspective on our behavioral triggers, and really don't have a clue as to the "why" of what we do. Now, we're not bad creatures. We just have a lot to learn about ourselves. Case in point: What do you get if you throw a human into a herd of horses? Dust. Lots and lots of dust. (Note: You get dust from horses chaotically running around in a corral.) Now what do you get when you throw a new manager into the middle of an already established team? Dust. Lots and lots of dust. In general,??humans are??goal oriented and rarely able to put together a process of getting from point A to point B without a certain degree of trial and error. Typically, those of us that are "direct line" think: "Point A to Point B. A=B, now." Life doesn't necessarily work that way, especially when we're trying to get another living creature to do something for us. We need to have an idea as to how they think and what makes them tick. Enter extroversion and introversion. Typically, extroversion (also extraversion) is defined as: "the act, state or habit of being predominantly concerned with obtaining gratification from what is outside the self. Conversely, introversion is defined as: "the state or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life. However, for the sake of this post, let's forgo the traditional definitions for a different set. Let's define extroversion as being physically active and introversion as being mentally active. Tips on How to Relieve Stress and Depression by Belinda Daly in Self Help / Advice (submitted 2010-10-04) The human body has a natural relaxation response which is an effective solution to all kinds of negative stress and depression. All methods of relaxation techniques - deep breathing, visualization, meditation, and yoga, etc. - aids your body to trigger the relaxation response. It is important to regularly practise these actions which will eventually lead to a big reduction in your everyday negative stress levels. These relaxation techniques will increase your feelings of bliss and tranquillity. They will also serve as a shielding experience by instructing you on how to stay serene when faced with the stresses of modern life. The fact is you cannot keep away from all negative stress, but it is possible to counterbalance its harmful effects by learning how to induce the automatic relaxation response. The relaxation response is when the mind, body and spirit are entwined and are in perfect harmony with each other. This deep state of relaxation is the reverse of the negative stress response which is detrimental to the mind, body and spirit. Please note though that the stress response is a vital factor of your autonomic nervous system - it's sub divided into the sympathetic nervous system and parasympathetic nervous system - because it creates chemicals in the body to prepare it for the fight or flight reaction. The stress response is helpful in life or death situations, but when it is constantly in action it causes detrimental effects on the mind, body and spirit. Frequently using relaxation techniques helps the relaxation response bring your mind, body and spirit into equilibrium. You can reduce stress hormones, slow down your heart rate and blood pressure by deep breathing and relaxing your muscles. The calming physical effects of the relaxation response will increase energy, fight ailments, relieves aches and pains, boosts motivation and productivity, etc. The great thing is with a little motivation to practise these techniques anyone can benefit from their harmonious effects. Below are some tips on how to relieve stress and depression: 1. Set aside at least 10 to 30 minutes per day for relaxation practice. 2. Start including relaxation practice into your daily routine. It is advisable to do your relaxation exercises in the early morning before you begin your other tasks and obligations. 3. Practice relaxation techniques when you are fully awake and attentive. If you are tired you will not get the full mental and physical benefits of relaxation techniques. 4. It is important that you choose the right relaxation techniques that makes you feel good. 5. If you are an introvert you will probably choose relaxation techniques that you can do alone like meditation or progressive muscle relaxation. Though if you are more extroverted you will probably do yoga classes. Whatever you choose to do - solo relaxation techniques or take classes - with constant practise it will keep your mind, body and spirit in complete harmony with each other. When you follow these tips on how to start relaxation exercise you will immediately start to feel like a new person. So don't delay go ahead and start becoming a more relaxed and focused human being! TO KEEP MIND SHARP, MEET FRIENDS, ATTEND PARTIES by Jyotishacharya Vinay Sheel Saxena in Spirituality / New Age (submitted 2011-08-20) An easy way to keep your brain sharp is to meet friends, attend parties or just play bingo! Frequent social activities may help to prevent or delay cognitive decline in old age, says a research conducted by the Rush University Medical Centre." If memory and thinking capabilities fail, socialising becomes difficult," added James, posy- doctoral fellow at Rush Alzheimer's Disease Centre. Yes it is true that social inactivity itself leads to cognitive impairments, some people just need alone time to 'recharge'. If they are around people too often then they feel drained until they can be alone for a while. Some people are wired that way. Some people are the opposite. They want to spend some time with their friends or in some social activities. It is the basic difference between being an introvert and being an extrovert. Vedic Astrology not only understands this issue but also has many effective remedial measures to overcome this problem. Being an astrologer I should tell you that you are not only passing the decisive time of your life but also there are some hindrances in your horoscope. Your stars and dasha are not supporting you as they should. In the most illustrious and distinguished profession of astrology I usually confront many new and strange experiences, some make me worried about these people, but some are really unusual that put me into the world of wonder. Today I want to share some peculiar type of experience with you. One day a young man aged about 28 years came to me. He was suffering from some unconventional types of problems. He was actually fed up with his life. He told me that I just want to move into a nice empty part of the world, and stay there, away from people, away from nagging bosses, cheating girlfriends, stupid people, politics, politician Worshippers, and people who blindly follow things like sheep. I just want to stay there and do whatever I want. I'm sick of the human conditions and the human existence as it is in this day and age. I'm sick of living amidst this big contest to buy more stuff pointlessly, this big contest to see who can be the most political moron at work, or see who's going to get married or nailed first. I just want to be somewhere where nobody's opinion matters anymore but my own. I tried to understand his problem and I succeeded. He was genuinely passing the crucial and critical time of his life. Despite of his hard work he could not get as much success in his life as he wanted to get, his girlfriend left him in lurch, and also his decisive so called friends were responsible for his deplorable and pathetic condition. I asked him to be happy and optimistic and suggested some remedial tips related to my Vedic astrology. After some days I got a call that he is recovering day by day. He was happy and satisfied with me and wanted to gift me something valuable things. The real gift which I got was that he was happy and recovering. I felt proud that time. I believe that happiness is a state of mind which gives us real pleasure and happiness and it has nothing to do with one's professions, physical charms and even intellectual attainments. In the modern world of sick hurry, we often forget to relax. Instead of taking sleeping pills at night, we should just learn how to meditate and relax for a few minutes daily. We should follow the path of truth, righteousness and sincerity to maintain peace of mind and give up negative thoughts such as anger, desire, vanity, avarice, attachments, sloth, etc. Above all tension should be avoided. Let sweetness in thought, temper and talk become our habit. Then happiness will pursue us rather than the other way about. Have a positive outlook, because if you have lost hope in life, you will always fear failure and tribulations of life, thus you will create miseries in your life due to your wrong attitude. Be cheerful and keep your face to the sunshine and please enjoy your friends' company. Whatever is there in your heart about other people, don't let it come to your face. Enjoy every movement of your life, forgive others. I am sure you will be the happiest person. Have trust in me and my Vedic Astrological thoughts. You will be well satisfied if you move on that path which I tell you to do. It can eliminate all your problems. It is for sure that in the time of your mental and emotional situation astrology can come to the rescue as it can see what are the precise placement of stars which are prompting the brain to act in this fashion and it can also be effectively judged that since how long it has been affecting and how much damaged it has caused. The ascendant chart along with D-6 and D-9 chart is read in commensuration with Dasha and Gochar (transit). It can be very precisely predicted that what remedial measures should be initialled by the native so that the effect gets minimized if not eradicated Top 5 Things to Do to Make Her Weak in the Knees by Tony Mandarich in Other (submitted 2009-10-30) Are you one of those guys unsure of what to say when around girls? Do you instantly clam up? Perhaps you are one of those guys who used to have skills but somehow lost his mojo along the way? No matter which description defines you, stop stressing for I'm going to teach you the top five things to say and/or do on your date ensuring she is yours tonight. If you practice these tips with confidence, then the girl will be hounding you with phone calls and she will be begging for more. 1. Hold her hand. No matter if the girl is an extrovert or an introvert, a girl melts over this old-fashioned step. Not sure exactly what it is about holding hands, but it works. Let's say for example you are walking ahead of her. Just inch your hand out behind you. If she is feeling you, she will naturally grab your hand into hers. It works every time. For some reason this puts girls in that "this is my man" state of mind setting precedent for the rest of the evening. 2. Tell her you are happy when you two are together. Girls eat this up, but make sure this isn't your first date with her. It may scare her away. However, if you are nearing relationship status, the girl will think it is the sweetest thing in the world. She will blush and gush and most likely go back and tell her girlfriends all about it. This is the result you want. You want her to the point she is eating out of your hand. If you let her know she makes you happy it is a way of informing her how important she is to you. Girls like to be placed in priority position in your life. So this is just one way to express it to her. 3. Tell her you wish she was with your girlfriend. Again, do not do this on the first date. If you did, she will lace up her Nike tennis shoes and sprint out the door. Make sure you are in a romantic setting, conversation is flowing, she may say something about how she feels about you, then express in a confident, yet nonchalant tone, that you wish she was your girlfriend. If you two are at a level of comfort for each other, then it will sound smooth and romantic guaranteeing you a great rest of the night. 4. Surprise her. Girls love romantic surprises. Surprise her with flowers, unexpected gifts or a planned date she knows nothing about. For instance, if she continuously talks about how one day she would love to go sky diving reserve a date with her. Ask her to dress in an appropriate manner without spoiling the surprise, book the sky diving place yourself and take her. She will love you forever. It shows you pay attention when she talks, and it reveals a spontaneous side. Girls love knowing it will not be monotonous spending time together. You will rack up bonus points for years with utilizing surprises. 5. Tell her how gorgeous she is when she smiles. She will be tugging at your clothes trying to take them off in no time after you relay this to her. It is the one thing that makes girls go weak in the knees instantly. And you are able to try this on the first or thirtieth date making it the number one advice I am able to pass along to you. Understanding different personality and how to interact with them increases our chances of succeeding in any activity whether it be a marriage, a family or business venture.?? In this article I would like to address two elements of the personality types, Introverts and Extroverts.How can I tell if I, my child, or partner is an Introvert or an Extrovert?The Extroverts tend to interact with many people, and are energized by the experience of large crowds. They usually find speaking to strangers easy, and are often seen as a€?the life of the partya€?.Introverts usually interact with a few people known to them,.?? They are often fatigued in large crowds, and need times of solitude to re-energize. They often find little to say to strangers.An important word of caution here:?? One needs to be careful not to use the information form this scientific study to label ourselves or others.?? No one fits into either category one hundred percent all of the time.?? Fore example many who would characterize themselves as an introvert would also say they can be quite extroverted when doing things they are passionate about. Many very successful singers would say this about themselves.We all can be varying degrees of these two elements, but most of us tend to be more of one than the other.The Source of Conflict, self esteem issues, and misunderstanding arise when we think one is better than the other, and especially when we try to change the other.?? It is natural to think that our way of doing things is the best way, and the majority usually wins in this battle.?? 75% of the population are extroverted, so who do you think gets most validated?We often hear well intentioned parents saying; a€?my child is an introvert, but I am working on ita€? as if it were a shortcoming. As a result introverts often report feeling as though they are not quite as well equipped for life as their counter part, which is a misinterpretation of the facts.?? Each has its own unique gifts, and each is important.Life requires both personalities.?? We balance and complement one another. The extroverts often have many friends, and seem to?? have just the right thing to say.?? The introverts have fewer friends, but they tend to be of a deeper level because they (the introverts) are good listeners.?? For relationships to be successful, we need communicators and listeners. Were we get into trouble is when we try to change the God given talents of another (or ourselves) and try to make them fit into an unnatural mold that the majority thinks they should be.?? When introverts discover nothing is wrong with them, it is often reported as being the most freeing experiencea€|freeing them to be who they are rather than?? trying to be who they never can be.?? What greater gift can we give to ourselves, our children, partner or co-worker than to free them in this manner.??A book I recommend on this subject is a€?Please Understand Mea€? by David Keirsey and Marilyn Bates. vote upvote downsharePrintflag Was this Hub ...? Useful Funny Awesome Beautiful Interesting CommentsLoading... // No comments yet. 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Name: Comment: jQuery(function(){jQuery("#comment_submit_8570578").attr("disabled","");});No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinkedComments are not for promoting your Hubs or other sitescom.observe(); jq(document).ready(function() { jq('#comment_submit_8570578').click(function() { var btn = this; btn.disabled = true; setTimeout(function() {btn.disabled = false;}, 1500); com_8570578.save(); return false; }); });More Research OpportunitiesTeachers, Tutors And Parents Education Information And Resource SiteAt this blog you will find all sorts of free stuff.Educational ProductsThe Death and Life of the Great American School System: How Testing and Choice Are Undermining EducationAmazon Price: $10.41 List Price: $16.99Democracy and Education: an introduction to the philosophy of educationAmazon Price: $1.99 Democracy And EducationAmazon Price: $9.98 List Price: $9.99 I have read numerous times that you should let the reader see your protagonist's characteristics within the first few pages. This enables the reader to quickly identify with him. This connection will determine whether the reader turns the next page. Unless you are writing fantasy or science fiction, your protagonist will have ordinary strengths (possibly extraordinary, but within the realm of reality); he will also have weaknesses. These qualities need to be conveyed early on. Here are 12 characteristics that may pertain to a protagonist or main character (MC): 1. Intelligent: Is your MC smart? If so how smart: is he a genius, did he finish college, does he gets all As in school? 2. Handy or Crafty: Maybe your MC isn't great at academics, but is he handy, musically inclined, or crafty? 2. Arrogant: Does your character think he's better or smarter than others? Does he let others know it? If so, how? 3. Trustworthy: Is your MC the kind of individual that others feel they can trust? 4. Determined: Does your MC know what he wants and strives to obtain his goal? 5. Greedy: Is your MC the kind of person who wants everything he doesn't have? Is he the type of person who wants much more than he actually needs? Does he make it obvious? 6. Dependable: Is your MC the kind of individual that others know they can count on? 7. Brave: Does your MC do what he has to even if he's frightened? Is he known for his bravery? 8. Cowardly: Is your MC afraid of his own shadow? Does he try to avoid any kind of confrontation or adventure? 9. Caring: Does your MC demonstrate kind and caring qualities? Does his family and friends think of him as a caring individual? 10. Selfish: Does your MC think of only himself? Is he known for this unsavory quality? Use DISC Personality Profile Test To Increase Employee Productivity by John Ess in Business / Human Resources (submitted 2010-12-29) The DISC personality profile test groups several different aspects of the person's behavior through testing their preferences in word associations. The phrase DISC stands for Dominance, Influence, Steadiness, and Conscientiousness .Dominance relates to control, power, and assertiveness. While influence pertains to interpersonal scenarios as well as communication. Steadiness is relating to patience, persistence, and thoughtfulness. Conscientiousness will be having to do with structure and organization. Everything DISC management is categorized in a grid by having a "D" and an "I" and share the top row that connotes the extroverted elements of the character. The "C" and "S" which are underneath them depict the introverted facet of the character. The "D" and "C" then share the left column and characterize aspects that are job focused. The "I" and "S" will share the right column and signify the interpersonal component. The way in which this matrix is established the vertical dimension will symbolize a factor of "Assertive" or "Passive" and the horizontal dimension will characterize "Open" vs. "Guarded". On the Dominance Disc online assessment method individuals that score high in the intensity of the "D" styles aspect is normally considered to be very productive in working with almost any issues and conflicts. While the men and women who have a minimal "D" are people that will need to find more information before they decide. Individuals which obtained a higher "D" are referred to as demanding, powerful, egocentric, as well as strong willed. On the other hand those who scored a minimal "D" tend to be called orthodox, low keyed, undemanding, humble as well as peaceful. Somebody that has high "T" ratings will probably influence others by talking, activity and usually are emotional. These kinds of individuals DISC online assessment will probably express them as convincing, magnetic, passionate, welcoming, demonstrative, trustworthy, and upbeat. Those that have lower "T" scores tend to be influenced by means of data and details not necessarily through their feelings. These people are described as being unproductive, informative, realistic, as well as cynical. The men and women that have higher steadiness ("S") scores with their DISC online aim for a stable rate, security, and don't wish to have unexpected changes. A high "S" rating person is described as quiet, laid back, possessive, as well as steady. People that have a minimal "S" are viewed restless, impatient, enthusiastic, plus impulsive. Somebody that has higher "C" (conscientious) scores are going to abide by rules, restrictions, as well as structure. They like for their tasks to be superior as well as can perform tasks right the very first time. These individuals are very careful, cautious, as well as exact. Those who report a minimal "C" on the DISC online could test the policies and want to be independent. They may be identified as stubborn, opinionated, and also unconcerned by the details. You're able to log on to our site to get a DISC online user profile trial. This can be the best in addition to helpful method of getting awareness of what an internet user profile will provide. These profiles end up being individualized towards the respondent. The questions will be answered live on-line and also the results will be measured automatically. That will make certain that the final results are exact. This can be accomplished from almost any computer which includes access to the internet. After the DISC online is completed the results are immediately accessible to the respondent so they will be provided the chance to look at the internet user profile. They are able to then print the results, save them on their computer, or simply e-mail their profile to another person. Knowing the difference between extroverts and introverts can help you understand yourself and others. Introversion and extroversion is often described as being a continuum. A person who is very extroverted, will not be very introverted. Most people are in the middle with one side being more dominate than the other. While everyone has variations in their behavior, people are often confused by responses of people who are on the opposite side of the spectrum. How do you recharge? The simplest distinction between introverts and extroverts is how they recharge. An extrovert recharges by being around other people. An introvert recharges by spending time alone or with a trusted friend or two. Whom do you trust? Extroverts are likely to reach for the phone if they are alone. They want someone to talk to about things that are happening or not. Introverts may be considered secretive but are more likely to trust only a few people. They are likely to think things through before acting or even discussing their thoughts with someone. Think or act, which comes first? The introvert tends to think first. An introvert tends to observe situations before they participate. They are likely to imagine different possibilities before they take action or discuss matters. Extroverts are people of action. They tend to need to enjoy brainstorming. They are more likely to spontaneous and take action immediately. Are you talkative? Introverts view extroverts as chatty and sometimes overly talkative. Extroverts tend to view introverts as shy or anti-social. Neither one is the case actually. Extroverts need to talk and be with others. Introverts prefer to think before talking. Some introverts get overwhelmed at parties or group settings. One reason introverts are considered quiet is they will wait for a pause in a conversation before speaking, extroverts tend to start speaking when there is a pause. What do you do when stressed? An extrovert is likely to gather friends for an activity or function. They may go shopping or find some place where people are. Introverts are more likely to withdraw. They may go home and curl up with a book or watch a movie at home. An introvert may call a friend or two but will likely avoid groups until stress subsides. Which one is better? There are some people who will argue that one side or the other is better. It takes both types of people and those in the middle to balance the world. While introverts may act like extroverts and extroverts may act like introverts, their nature is one or the other. Pretending to be someone they are not will ultimately fail in some form. If however both sides become informed, they can understand and relate to each other. What's Her Type? Keys To Understanding Your Child by Dede Perkins in Family (submitted 2008-05-25) "Let us beware and beware and beware...of having an ideal for our children. So doing, we damn them." D.H. Lawrence So begins the parenting chapter of David Keirsey's Please Understand Me, II. Although "typing" personalities began in the days of Plato, nearly 2400 years ago, most of us have not been given the tools to understand one another. When I was a child and was hurt or confused by a friend's behavior, my mother and grandmother would say "Everyone's crazy but me and thee. And sometime I wonder about thee." We'd shrug and laugh and that would be that. Knowing I wasn't the only one to be confused by people's behavior always made me feel better. Realizing we are different, however, I wondered why are we expected to act the same? Why are introverts encouraged to relax and enjoy the party? Why are energetic children told to sit still and behave? Why are dreamers often pulled back to earth? Would we be better off if we celebrated each other's differences instead of trying to change them? In Please Understand Me, II, David Keirsey argues yes. As he writes on page one, "...people are different from each other, and [that] no amount of getting after them is going to change them. Nor is there any reason to change them, because the differences are probably good." So instead of worrying that your child doesn't sit still or sits still too much, that she dreams too much or dreams too little, that she's too outgoing or not outgoing enough, relax. Instead, try to understand her true nature and parent accordingly. Kiersey writes, "...overseeing Mother Nature's project, maturation, requires parents to become child watchers, not child shapers, acting only when they detect a teachable moment or opportunity to encourage the growth of some attitude or action that is consistent with the child's temperament...Parents must be able to answer the question, 'What kind of person is my child, and what can I do to help him or her grow in that direction?'" So take a moment and think about your child. Does she thrive on physical action? Does she jump on her bike and race around the neighborhood? Dive elbow deep into finger paints? Play her guitar day after day after day, just to get it right? If so, according to Keirsey, she's probably an "Artisan" like Amelia Earhart or Barbra Streisand. "These children shine in action...The entire range of fine and practical arts, and of competitive games and sports, will grab budding Artisans - they need physical movement and novelty, and they love contests," Keirsey writes. If your child loves stories, prefers make-believe over physical play, is sensitive and concerned about others, Keirsey calls her an "Idealist" like Eleanor Roosevelt or Margaret Mead. Idealists "seem to have a natural talent for relating intimately with others, or for what I have called "diplomatic empathy," he writes. Is your child helpful, eager to understand and follow rules, unsettled by change? Is she the traditional "good little girl?" Perhaps she's a "Guardian" like Elizabeth II or Mother Teresa. Keirsey writes "Guardian self respect seems to be enhanced when they are serving others. Even as young as five, Guardians can be seem doing good deeds, not only for their parents and teachers, but also for their siblings and friends." Finally, is your child a collector of shells, rocks, butterflies, stamps? Does she love to push buttons, take things apart and reassemble them, master a computer game? Does she ask endless "why" questions, seeking to understand the way things work? If so, Keirsey calls her a "Rational" like Margaret Thatcher or Marie Curie. "More than anything else, Rational children wish to learn how things work. They start their logistical investigations early and continue them throughout life," he writes. After you consider your child's temperament, ask yourself, is she an introvert or an extrovert? Is she a "fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants" type kid or one who prefers knowing what her day will bring? Finally, which of the four temperaments best describes you? Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Do you prefer an orderly, well-planned day or an open and flexible day? Understanding your own personality may illuminate how you perceive your child's strengths and weaknesses and how they affect you. In short, understanding personality and temperament can make you a better parent. To read more about personality and temperament and/or take his online personality sorter, check out Keirsey's web site at http:keirsey.com. Chances are, you'll be glad you did. There are times, when you're an introvert, that people think you are shy or snobby, anti-social, or cold-hearted. Just because you prefer to be alone does not mean there is something wrong with you. Being the life of the party is not the most important thing in the world to you. Actually, just the idea of being at the party can be an ugly thought. What exactly is an introvert? It has little to do with shyness. An introvert may be shy, but this quality has nothing to do with introversion. I am an introvert. I'm energized by being alone. When I'm around other people for too long, my energy is drained. I bask in the quiet of being alone where I can think and explore my own thoughts and feelings. That's why I enjoy staying home and writing articles, designing my own website, and reflecting and pondering on things from within the inner world of my mind. Although I am blunt and to the point when I speak, most who have worked with and around me in the past will tell you that I have good social skills. I can do it, I just don't want to. It can be exhausting. I avoid social situations as much as possible, and for me, the alone time is time for renewal. Introversion is not depression. It's a dimension of the personality. I know people who can't seem to accept this trait and have unrealistic expectations of what I should be like. I don't want to be like them or someone else. I'm going to be like me. I can only be my best me when I have the chance to regain the energy I lose from being around others. Even being around people I like and feel comfortable around can prevent my need and desire to be quietly introspective. Why Do Introvert Tend to Make Others Upset by Luckysatr in Food / Recipes (submitted 2011-08-28) Why do introverted people find it is difficult to mingle with other people? It is as if they are from the outer space and they came to the earth by mistake. They are easy to be misunderstood. If you are an introvert, you must be desired to solve the problem. However, if not, you may also want to know the reason in order to go along well with your introverted friends and relatives. Here are some reasons for the strange behaviours of introverted people: it is rare for an introverted people to show themselves in public or reveal their thoughts. They look mysterious and estranged. What's more, as you can see, the world is in favour of those outgoing guys. Many extroverts are suspicious of the talent introverted people occupy. Unfortunately, some introverts are not sure of the contributions they have brought to the world. First of all, let's have a look at the special traits of introverted people. In fact, they can be much more complicated, when they are exhausted, they may not act in the same way as before. For example, one day they can be very energetic and talkative. However, the other day you will see they are quite unwilling to be dragged out of their own mind and it is impossible for them to speak with you actively, which of course confuses people around them. What introverted people tend to do is as follows: 1. They pay more attention on the inner world, which makes other people hard to understand them. 2. They can be very concentrated on a difficult math question. 3. They usually hesitate before giving a talk. 4. They try their best to avoid the crowd and find a tranquil place. 5. They can be completely neglect what other people are doing. 6. They are cautious about the social activities they take part in. 7. You can never see too many facial expressions of them. 8. They can be very anxious if not given enough time to be alone. 9. They will not express their opinions until asked. When you have known their characteristics, it will not be hard to understand why they are always so mysterious to you. There are a lot of difference between an extrovert and an introvert. For example, the way of thinking and speaking. An extrovert is thinking while speaking, which is a piece of cake to them. However, it is actually impossible for an introvert to make it. It takes some time for introverted people to think before speaking and they are not active to speak except the topic is familiar to them. Outgoing people can never understand them for their minds will become more and more clear when speaking so that they do not need any other time to think.Here are some reasons for the strange behaviours of introverted people: it is rare for an introverted people to show themselves in public or reveal their thoughts. They look mysterious and estranged. What's more, as you can see, the world is in favour of those outgoing guys. Many extroverts are suspicious of the talent introverted people occupy. Unfortunately, some introverts are not sure of the contributions they have brought to the world. Your must know guide to prepare for an interview by Jon Ciampi in Careers / Interviews (submitted 2010-02-06) Congratulations; you've landed an interview - the first step in the hiring process! Celebrate for a moment, and then take a deep breath. There are a few more hurdles to jump before landing that job. How do you prepare? Your goal is to get a second interview! Armed with your goal and a copy of the job description, it's time to check out the company. What do they do? What do they sell or provide, and to whom? Look for evidence through research and interviews with similarly employed professionals about how your role fits into the company's mission statement and overall operations. Familiarize yourself with this information and incorporate it into your tone and content for the interview. Next, dig into the company's performance. What strengths and weaknesses are evident; have they recently reached any milestones? Let your interviewer know you have skills that can solve issues specific to the industry. Review company reports, press releases and news stories to look for clues about what the company wants to accomplish or fix, and where money and resources are being spent. If the company is public (or a competitor), I highly recommend using Yahoo! Finance to research the company performance, competitors, annual letter, and analyst reports. You may need to buy an analyst report, but it will be the best money you can spend. Formulate questions and know the answers ahead of time. You'll be able to converse on the answers you receive with intelligence and confidence. Now, you need to practice your interview. Check the company website for info about the actual interview process. Research and be ready for any specific approach you may encounter. Find out if tests or technical questions are involved and make sure you're ready to address them. Answer these five questions to cover the basics: 1. Are you qualified for the position? Simple statements work here - cover your education, training, and pertinent experiences. 2. What motivates you? Discuss what thrills you about this work. 3. What are your "negative" factors? Be brave - nobody is perfect. Talk about these frankly, but be sure to include a positive evolution from the condition or the results! 4. Are you a good fit? Teamwork or lone activities? Introvert or extrovert? Ethics? 5. Why do you want the job? Focus on how the company can lead their competitors with your help. What benefits will you bring to the job? And finally, relax! With great preparation, you'll get a good night's sleep and be at your very best on the important day. Good luck. More on job interview preparations...